Self-awareness relative to age range?
I'm wondering what you all think about the notion of "self-awareness", which kind of has a fluctuating meaning, but I am thinking about it relative to periods of life...for both ASD and NT folks. I've heard it said now and again that you don't really attain self-awareness until your 30s (and that's presumably with NTs in mind), so I guess for us it must be in one's 40s, or even later (?) since there's that heuristic formula of "two-thirds of one's age" applied to Aspies' emotional mentality.
I've also heard it bandied around here and there that your personality is not really calcified until around the age of 27; again, that must be with an NT population in mind.
My self-awareness definitely took off after my diagnosis at 27. I wasn't aware of weird mannerisms, somewhat monotone voice, or tics or stimming or such until post-diagnosis and then was able to correct or mask those more effectively and assess people's facial expressions more in dialogue with them.
But this is the thing about the neuro-centric definition of "self-awareness"...it seems to be awareness of how others see you, not how you (accurately) believe you appear to them. Or, to NTs, the two perspectives seem to be one and the same - which I think has to do with more innate ToM or theory of mind.
It has been my observation that self-awareness is something most people never attain, period.
This seems to tally with my experience, when I was in my twenties I had very little self-awareness.
I was probably about 40 when I became fully aware of my social missteps and neurological differences and started actively wondering "what the heck is wrong with me?"
But having a complete misconception of what autism/aspergers is, it took me until I was 45 (and a lot of googling) to work it out.
Since then self-awareness of my autism has increased to painful proportions, but I'm hoping that the ongoing journey will reveal something of purpose and meaning behind it all, and I can achieve greater self-acceptance.
I've also heard it bandied around here and there that your personality is not really calcified until around the age of 27; again, that must be with an NT population in mind.
My self-awareness definitely took off after my diagnosis at 27. I wasn't aware of weird mannerisms, somewhat monotone voice, or tics or stimming or such until post-diagnosis and then was able to correct or mask those more effectively and assess people's facial expressions more in dialogue with them.
But this is the thing about the neuro-centric definition of "self-awareness"...it seems to be awareness of how others see you, not how you (accurately) believe you appear to them. Or, to NTs, the two perspectives seem to be one and the same - which I think has to do with more innate ToM or theory of mind.
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"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph
I also have mistakenly(?) thought "self-awareness" was something more like social awareness: awareness of how other's perceive one. Per my Google search:
self awareness: conscious knowledge of one's own character, feelings, motives, and desires
which has nothing to do with how one is perceived.
I am very aware --- but am still unclear about the self-awareness. For instance, I have always been hyper aware of my feelings and others' feelings, but cause or effect eludes me (as there are infinite contributors really). I know that I am capable of being very kind, very mean and everywhere in between - so my character seems to be where I choose to "hang out" most of the time. I have lots of desires, an overwhelming amount so .... I don't get it. I think my therapist would say I'm more self-aware than most people (and always have been), but I seem to lack self or action or something. Perhaps I am hyper self-aware but lack in assertiveness to an alarming degree, so the self-awareness (and social awareness) is just plain hurtful.
There are stages. OP is referring to levels 3-5.
I'll try to summarize it;
Level 3 is usually around theory of mind, the idea around empathy, representation of self and others.
Level 4 is like some form of temporal permanence and social bigger picture thinking.
Level 5 is true self awareness. A lot may never able to attain it at all.
It can drive a person mad if not ready.
There are some accounts I've previously read around autistics and stages of self awareness.
There's a recurring theme around it; it involves either not attaining anywhere at level 3, or ignoring and skipping level 3.
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How did you determine that the OP was referring to levels 3-5 of a specific way of characterizing awareness? Freud said there were three, those working to realize artificial intelligence usually go with four stages, marketing folks go with five, some ways of arranging go with seven levels or stages, and another goes with fifteen levels - along with a smattering of lessor known systems.
It can drive a person mad if not ready.
It is my understanding that one cannot attain true self-awareness if one is not ready. True self awareness and madness cannot co-exist.
How did you determine that the OP was referring to levels 3-5 of a specific way of characterizing awareness? Freud said there were three, those working to realize artificial intelligence usually go with four stages, marketing folks go with five, some ways of arranging go with seven levels or stages, and another goes with fifteen levels - along with a smattering of lessor known systems.
Most inquiries like this is usually to do with comparing developmental stages.
Therefore the post I replied is based on developmental stages.
I'm sure it is not referring to the Freud's -- those are 3 levels of awareness in which most people of almost all ages would clinically have.
It does not fluctuate, because the term is not in a form of developmental stages.
In the AI/human terms -- there are multiple stages and more to do with complex and fluid intelligence.
Self recognition or 'awareness' is more of a feature than a developmental stage -- because not all machines are predetermined to have one.
Marketing terms isn't very relevant -- it is usually portrayed as 5 stages.
It is more like a reference of customers for business strategies than what the OP inquires.
Also... It is about self awareness, not necessarily self consciousness or consciousness itself.
Post implies neurotypicals of ages late 20s to early 30s or beyond -- supposedly "adulting years".
Age of doing X implies developmental stages or milestones.
At the same time, not at the stage of true self awareness, which usually lies at final stages.
The post implies multiple things while trying to compare an ASD account to overall NT account;
one is about the later stages of self exploration (late/ending of personality 'development' and identification), another about theory of mind (usually lies in the middle), and awareness of outward expressions (which is typically placed at the earlier stages than the other two).
Thus the post says it fluctuates -- that maybe, in ASD terms, it is over the place if it's applied to NT terms of development.
It can drive a person mad if not ready.
It is my understanding that one cannot attain true self-awareness if one is not ready. True self awareness and madness cannot co-exist.
Nonetheless, it seems one can miss the conditional terms.
Madness isn't the exact term...
The other term is... "Drowning".
Also some systems or terms say awareness implies control (which apparently you subscribe to -- which is to do with levels of consciousness) -- some don't and is not necessarily true.
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A similar thing happened to me but the anxiety decreased a lot in my late teens as I grew more confident in my masking abilities, maybe a little more than I should have been but it was better for me than not talking. I'm still shy but not nearly as bad as in early high school.