NTs and shutdown

Post Reply New Topic

I watched a NT have a shutdown/meltdown in the grocery store yesterday. I assume she was an NT but could have been on the spectrum or have any disorder. Her electric cart ran out of power and she was stuck in the middle of the pathway. She did not say anything to anybody for at least the five minutes I was in line to check-out (busy store). I thought it was odd that she was right in the middle of the aisle but she was talking to people. When a store employee finally walked by her, she then exploded. He offered to help but everything he suggested was wrong. He kept asking her what she wanted and her answer was for him to fix the cart there in the aisle. Not finding a solution, he just pushed her to the checkout while she complained about it. She was capable of walking out the store while an employee helped carry out the groceries along with another man that looked capable to help. I do understand her frustrations but just watching her berate the employee for an unreasonable request was something else. Not humorous but just...no words to describe it other than meh.

A man in line behind me commented, "That folks, is why meth is bad for you." I told him to be nice and another man backed me up. My issue is that I masked (snark with a fake smile) and had no sympathy or compassion for the woman. I understood she may be on the spectrum and was experiencing a shutdown but I still smiled at the man's cruel comment. I used my own guilt for smiling to confront the man. Karma is gonna get me for this.

I am not a bad man, I just wanted you to know. ~ Patty Griffin (Ohio)

That was his last movie; 'Giant', before he got mangled in a sportscar. TLDR.

That wouldn't be a shutdown. If anything it was a meltdown. Shutdowns aren't demonstrative or verbal like that.

Smiling when someone makes a bad remark doesn't make you a bad person nor does it make you deserve karma. Just because you're on the spectrum yourself doesn't mean you have to be 100% compassionate of everybody's problems all the time. Just relax a little. No need to beat yourself up about it.

Pal, I would smirk too, but naturally, not while masking. The type of humour I enjoy the most is dark humour, especially situational one.

But consider this: in situation that you've described, it is not the behaviour of the woman which I find funny. If anything, it is worrying. But that remark, thrown in this particular situation? Yeah, I find it funny. Sometimes I feel bad for finding certain things humorous, but hey - it's just who I am and it is not like I can just wave that feeling away.

I remember a conversation, years ago, between me and several pals whom I've skated with. We were in a car, as one of the guys was giving each of us a ride home. We lived in the same area of city, ended up skating around all day, goofing around and jumping off stairs, drank a few beers and nobody was in the mood to do a 20km skate to get back to bed. Anyway, there was a girl I barely knew in the car and we started chatting. It turned out that she went to the same high school, with art profile, as my mom did. I told her that and she was like:

-Oooh! That's interesting! I've never met anyone significantly older than me who finished this school! Tell me, is she an artist? What she is doing now?

Me:

-She is not. Does nothing. Just like all people like her. She's dead.

I fully expected that everyone in the car will laugh out loud. It was funny to me. But instead, it was dead (no pun intended!) silence, all the way to our district. After a while, the girl said "I'm sorry about your mom".

I had similar experience at funeral of a classmate from my studies. She died in an accident - two trains crashed head-on due to tracks steering switch malfunction. I truly grieved and felt sad for her death, even though we weren't close - but I knew that she was a honestly good person, always helpful, emphatic. One of those who we have way too few in the world. It was a loss.

When we were by her grave and people put flowers on it, one of colleagues have stumbled, fallen, completely messed her dress and covered it in dirt (it was a rainy day on graveyard) and destroyed the bouquet she was carrying. Instinctively, she said something that can be best translated at "f***, it's a train wreck" (even though the word she used is more of an equivalent to catastrophe, it have slightly different meaning in my native language).

Let me tell you, I turned around and walked off, because I just couldn't keep a straight face because of her choice of words. I was honestly sad that day - but the fact that I've heard that sentence by the grave of someone who died in accident involving trains made my brain firing "haha" on all cylinders. I felt a bit guilty about it.

That line would make me smirk too. It was funny, and I like dark humor.

That wonan does have a mental illness, it’s called “Being a Karen”.

Eh, I wouldn't laugh at such.
I won't waste my mental energy over that.

I'll just blankly stare at it, waiting whatever it was to finish itself and be done with it.
Or, find another line that's moving faster if I'm not patient enough.


If someone's commenting and asks me to back it up, I'll stare at them just as blankly.

Yes, I would've decided to be creepy about it.
If that person flinches, roll their eyes or calls me a creep... Now THAT would've make me smile.

Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.