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Fnord
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06 Aug 2022, 10:11 am

Twilightprincess wrote:
I’d prefer to see “cranky, abrasive, opinionated, and generally unpleasant” in an ad for a job.
Where do I sign up?



Twilightprincess
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06 Aug 2022, 10:14 am

Fnord wrote:
Twilightprincess wrote:
I’d prefer to see “cranky, abrasive, opinionated, and generally unpleasant” in an ad for a job.
Where do I sign up?

:lol:


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babybird
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06 Aug 2022, 10:23 am

Anyway once you do manage to pass an interview most workplaces have an unwritten rule of leaving your personality at the door.


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Fnord
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06 Aug 2022, 10:29 am

babybird wrote:
Anyway once you do manage to pass an interview most workplaces have an unwritten rule of leaving your personality at the door.
It is more like, "Leave your angst and drama at home; we did not hire hire you to be a crisis actor."



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06 Aug 2022, 10:31 am

Oh and god forbid you might have a life outside of the job.


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HeroOfHyrule
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06 Aug 2022, 10:31 am

I'm a "lone wolf". Other people don't like interacting with me, and they don't trust that I can get things done since I don't communicate the same way they do. If I work by myself though I do just fine and don't have to worry about working around others + having them prevent me from doing the things I know I can do.

Sometimes allistics are more of a barrier to the autistic person, than the autistic person is a barrier to them, which is how things seem to work out for me despite the fact that everyone acts like I'm a barrier to them.


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HeroOfHyrule
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06 Aug 2022, 10:38 am

Outside of work and in relation to "group projects" in school, I either just did the projects by myself or did nothing because no one wanted to be in a group with me, nor would they let me do anything if I was in a group with them. There were a couple times where I did have to do everything though because the people in my group slacked off, which I didn't care about because I didn't have to deal with them and I made sure we got a good grade.


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I use he/him pronouns.

I watch a lot of cartoons and anime. I also have a cat and a rabbit as pets. I like to learn + catalogue information about other organisms, especially rodents (+ related animals) and great apes.

I don't often respond to PMs, unless I interact with the person that's PMing me a lot on the forums.


Fnord
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06 Aug 2022, 10:46 am

babybird wrote:
Oh and god forbid you might have a life outside of the job.
Or just be a woman with at least one child.



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06 Aug 2022, 10:48 am

HeroOfHyrule wrote:
Outside of work and in relation to "group projects" in school, I either just did the projects by myself or did nothing because no one wanted to be in a group with me, nor would they let me do anything if I was in a group with them. There were a couple times where I did have to do everything though because the people in my group slacked off, which I didn't care about because I didn't have to deal with them and I made sure we got a good grade.


I didn't have the confidence of playing team sports and anything to do with close contact when I was at school because of physical and sexual abuse. I was covered in bruises and I thought that people could smell the abuse on me. I'm still a bit like that now but it's got easier with age.

I hope things get easier for you in time HoH.


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06 Aug 2022, 10:51 am

Fnord wrote:
babybird wrote:
Oh and god forbid you might have a life outside of the job.
Or just be a woman with at least one child.


I once overheard a manager telling his HR woman that she best never get pregnant. He was serious as well.


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Fnord
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06 Aug 2022, 11:14 am

babybird wrote:
Fnord wrote:
babybird wrote:
Oh and god forbid you might have a life outside of the job.
Or just be a woman with at least one child.
I once overheard a manager telling his HR woman that she best never get pregnant. He was serious as well.
I have also heard that spoken, and it might have a lot to do with why raises and promotions seem to be based on total hours "on the clock" -- holidays, maternity leave, personal days, sick days, and vacation days do not count -- instead of how long someone has been employed.  Mothers are more likely than fathers to take time off for pregnancies, post-natal care, and to care for sick children.

Yes, I know that last statement seems sexist, and I am not suggesting that it describes how things 'should' be.  I am just saying that fathers seem to take fewer days off than mothers when children are involved, and THAT is a sexist situation.



shortfatbalduglyman
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06 Aug 2022, 11:25 am

Fnord wrote:
babybird wrote:
Anyway once you do manage to pass an interview most workplaces have an unwritten rule of leaving your personality at the door.
It is more like, "Leave your angst and drama at home; we did not hire hire you to be a crisis actor."

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06 Aug 2022, 12:23 pm

Fnord wrote:
babybird wrote:
Fnord wrote:
babybird wrote:
Oh and god forbid you might have a life outside of the job.
Or just be a woman with at least one child.
I once overheard a manager telling his HR woman that she best never get pregnant. He was serious as well.
[color=black]I have also heard that spoken, and it might have a lot to do with why raises and promotions seem to be based on total hours "on the clock" -- holidays, maternity leave, personal days, sick days, and vacation days do not count -- instead of how long someone has been employed.  Mothers are more likely than fathers to take time off for pregnancies, post-natal care, and to care for sick children.


It could be a major challenge to work while breastfeeding, too. Some types of employment and workplaces would not be very accommodating when it comes to that.

People should have more time off for maternity leave AND paternity leave.


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Twilightprincess
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06 Aug 2022, 12:44 pm

I think colleagues think of me as a pushover. If they get tired of students, they send them over to me at the wrong times even though I'm busy with other students. Some of those students have severe behavioral/emotional issues that require ALL of my focus and energy.

I would love to have some of the kids all day every day, but I have other commitments, too, and it would be nice to have lunch and to use the bathroom once in awhile. Last year, I decided that a good solution would be to pick up those students when it was time for me to have them, and I discussed it with the teachers in very clear but kind terms. It worked for about a week, but invariably, the teachers would gradually start sending them over again no matter the time. Also, I can't just turn the little monsters away once they are with me because it would hurt their feelings. I'm like a mom to some of them.

There are other situations like this one as well. This is just one example. I've been given extra duties which involve going in early, staying late, and doing extra work that is not part of my job description. My pay has been awful, but it's going to improve in the next couple of weeks. It's a complicated situation.

Anyway, so yeah, I prefer being a lone wolf. I struggle with finding the right balance between being nice and being firm, so I err on the side of caution and am nice, but it's not exactly working out for me.


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babybird
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06 Aug 2022, 1:31 pm

Yeah I think that sometimes nice people can get taken advantage of.


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06 Aug 2022, 2:12 pm

The other thing is, when kids are ill they always want Mummy, not Daddy. So Mummy ends up staying at home/ getting up in the night to look after them. That's another reason mothers stay at home with sick kids more.


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