Newsweek: I Have Asperger's, Here's What Everyone Gets Wrong

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Fnord
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04 Aug 2022, 12:45 pm

"I Have Asperger's, Here's What Everyone Gets Wrong", by Matthew Kenslow

Strangers might assume that I am drunk or on drugs because of how I walk and talk. 

Because I act differently to other people, I believe others assume that I am unfit for society.  There is a misconception that autistic people won't amount to anything.  But I am one of many who are proving otherwise.


(Me too, Matt!  Me too!)

Read the Full Article
 HERE 



KitLily
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04 Aug 2022, 1:53 pm

That's a good article, thanks FNord.

Hopefully I'm proving otherwise too. I set up my own business and run it by myself. Apart from my daughter, that is my greatest achievement.

So sad that people feel the need to shout at Matthew just because he looks different to how they think he should.


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kraftiekortie
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04 Aug 2022, 2:31 pm

Many people with Asperger’s succeed. And classic autism, too.

There are quite a few success stories on this Site.

I’m not even Asperger’s…I’m a classic autistic...and I’ve succeeded somewhat. Not as much as some others. I’m not a professional…..but I have a degree, and will be retiring from my Civil Service job in 5 months. I’ve been just a clerk for 42 years, 41 for the same entity. But I’m getting a pension that’s almost as much as my present income.



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04 Aug 2022, 9:49 pm

What is frustrating is that stereotypes contradict each other.


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05 Aug 2022, 2:29 pm

Thank you for sharing this story. I know that I will succeed at the things that I enjoy doing.


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lostonearth35
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05 Aug 2022, 2:40 pm

Sometimes it feels like autism is the only disability that people in general think you won't amount to anything if you have it. People can be blind or deaf or in wheelchairs but the geniuses are always saying how "inspiring" it is that such people can live decent and productive lives. But if you're on the spectrum they think we're all trapped in our own little worlds and that we bring nothing but pain and suffering to our family members. When will it ever stop?



Joe90
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05 Aug 2022, 2:45 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
Sometimes it feels like autism is the only disability that people in general think you won't amount to anything if you have it. People can be blind or deaf or in wheelchairs but the geniuses are always saying how "inspiring" it is that such people can live decent and productive lives. But if you're on the spectrum they think we're all trapped in our own little worlds and that we bring nothing but pain and suffering to our family members. When will it ever stop?


People with downs syndrome get the same treatment too. I know a 30-year-old girl with downs, and she has never been employed even though she's more capable than she looks. Also people often talk for her, thinking that she can't talk for herself. She gets depressed often because the world thinks that she's "stupid".


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Shadweller
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06 Aug 2022, 5:46 am

Fnord wrote:

Because I act differently to other people, I believe others assume that I am unfit for society.  There is a misconception that autistic people won't amount to anything.  But I am one of many who are proving otherwise.


(Me too, Matt!  Me too!)

Read the Full Article
[b] HERE 


I think it's quite apparent that those on the spectrum who cannot help acting differently have many more issues than those that are able to mask successfully and hide their differences.

I have experienced this directly myself. Sometimes I can blend in and not stand out, which is usually all I want to do. It seems to me that whenever my "mask" slips the "feedback" from others is immediate. It seems that someone is always ready to pounce with a comment, or mockery etc, the instant my mask slips. I'm trying to figure out if I can gain any benefit from this, and work out if i could have acted differently to avoid that happening, but it seems that it's often been when I've been unable to change my way of being.

Sometimes I cannot be anything other than what I am. To some extent I shouldn't have to be, but if you act different, the consequences are going to be harsh. We live in a neurotypical world that does not understand or tolerate differences.

The guy in that video stands out a mile just due to that jacket he is wearing with all the badges / medals. If he walks round in public wearing such clothes he is going to attract attention of the wrong kind. That would be such an easy thing to change too.

In the UK something like 87% of diagnosed Autistic people are unemployed. To the extent that I have held down jobs for the majority of my life I have been "fit for society", although things have often been excruciatingly difficult and painful socially.

I have underachieved in my working life relative to other people in my family and my peer group at school, but I'm doing relatively OK work wise I guess, considering how much I am affected by my Autism. My current admin / clerical job suits me quite well in that I don't have to take irate customer service type phone calls, and it's not stressful. The people I work with currently all treat me well, which makes a huge difference and I am thankful for this.



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06 Aug 2022, 10:14 am

This reminds me of that saying-

Society: Be yourself!
Society: No. Not like that.


This is so true.


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Fnord
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06 Aug 2022, 10:23 am

KitLily wrote:
This reminds me of that saying-

Society: Be yourself!
Society: No. Not like that.


This is so true.
Reminds me of a line spoken by Major Frank Burns (Larry Linville) in the M*A*S*H television series:

"Individuality is fine, as long as we all do it together."

The episode was titled "George", and was first aired on 1974-02-16.  The story was about a decorated GI who confided to Hawkeye that he was beaten by men in his own unit for being gay; but Frank Burns is outraged when he finds out from another source and tries to have the soldier dishonorably discharged.



KitLily
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06 Aug 2022, 2:17 pm

Fnord wrote:
KitLily wrote:
This reminds me of that saying-

Society: Be yourself!
Society: No. Not like that.


This is so true.
Reminds me of a line spoken by Major Frank Burns (Larry Linville) in the M*A*S*H television series:

"Individuality is fine, as long as we all do it together."

The episode was titled "George", and was first aired on 1974-02-16.  The story was about a decorated GI who confided to Hawkeye that he was beaten by men in his own unit for being gay; but Frank Burns is outraged when he finds out from another source and tries to have the soldier dishonorably discharged.


Yes...people like the IDEA of others being different and individual but not when it affects them :lol:


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07 Oct 2022, 7:51 pm

The author of the article also has a YouTube channel.


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07 Oct 2022, 10:20 pm

You’d think in 2022 publications wouldn’t use that outdated label anymore.


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08 Oct 2022, 10:16 am

Zakatar wrote:
You’d think in 2022 publications wouldn’t use that outdated label anymore.


For the article in the OP, Newsweek used “Asperger’s” because that is how the articles Author described himself. And that reason is true for media in general. While Aspergers has been out of the DSM for almost a decade it is still a common colloquial term. Posters on this website use it often and Asperger’s is a diagnosis option in your profile.


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08 Oct 2022, 11:35 am

Shadweller wrote:

I have experienced this directly myself. Sometimes I can blend in and not stand out, which is usually all I want to do. It seems to me that whenever my "mask" slips the "feedback" from others is immediate. It seems that someone is always ready to pounce with a comment, or mockery etc, the instant my mask slips. I'm trying to figure out if I can gain any benefit from this, and work out if i could have acted differently to avoid that happening, but it seems that it's often been when I've been unable to change my way of being.


What can be the most frustrating is those who are half on and half off the spectrum because those that are definately autistic and who have issues are generally excused and helped along by those who are not (Not saying this is always the case but in general), but those who are able to mask and/or only have certain traits so appear to be NT-like are the ones who can have the hardest times because people compare them to NT's and here is the problem because the issues they have is when they do come across an area they struggle in, they are told they are not trying hard enough or they are not given the help they need or an allowance of time to recover when they need it. (They also tend to be taken advantage of a lot which an NT would not dare do to an obviously autistic person because they could be named and shamed for what they have done).
When I look back on my life it is surprizing how held back I have been by others who took advantage and pocketed my earnings for themselves.
Yet because we 'Can" do things, does not mean that we don't struggle.
It used to really puzzle me through school where I was told off for underperforming many times when other times I could do the tasks with ease, just because I hit one of those flustered situations or I had hit a partial shutdown so I was on a mental "Go-slow" and yet because teachers did not know this and I did not know why it happened or how to explain this (Even if I am not on the spectrum I still had these trait-like issues) and so all I got was to be told off for not performing like I could do and teachers genuinely assumed I was purposefully being "Awkward" with them in my abilities not being up to my usual standard.

But here I go again making no sense to most people... But I may as well post this anyway! Haha!


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09 Oct 2022, 5:54 am

There's such a wide range of abilities and mindsets within the autistic community. The general public tends to judge autistic people by what they're worst at, rather than by their strengths.