Is having an obsession (or obsessions) problematic?

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I scared away all my Facebook friends because of my "obsessions"

I feel like a loser

Yes.

Then nothing of value was lost. I wouldn't unfriend anyone because of their obsessions. These people weren't really your friends.

Though basically I don't have friends anymore, or desire to have friends lol (I'm schizoid)

Having an obsession is problematic when it's unhealthy. E.g. when you spend your entire day with it, and neglect everything else.

I used to have obsessions with people when I was in my teens. It would make me look like a stalker. I wasn't intending on causing any harm, I just wanted to find out everything about them because I was just so obsessed.

I was so obsessed, that nothing else in my life mattered except these few local people I knew of that I developed an obsession with. I didn't choose the obsession, it chose me. It was probably the reason I lost friends, because I wouldn't talk about anything else but my obsession. It took over my mind so much that it was impossible to even think about anything else, so that was why I couldn't talk about anything else.
But the strange thing was that I didn't like having this obsession. It wasn't like a special interest I could indulge in and learn useful things. It was an unhealthy obsession that made me look like a stalker. Thankfully I don't really have those obsessions any more.

I don't really get obsessed with things. I've not really got the attention span for it. I like things fir a short while and then I move onto liking the next thing and so on.

The only thing I've ever really stuck to long term is my exercise regime but I wouldn't say I'm obsessed with that. I just do it because it's necessary.

It goes both ways. Marie Curie was obsessed with radiation. It got her two Nobel prizes, and killed her.

Obsessions are problematic if:

If it doesn't align with safety, function and job, or certain ideas of whatever standards or value you prioritize over.

Intrusive, distressing, unacceptable, isolating, causing mental health issues.

Poorly expressed or impulsively shared, poorly compartmentalized, and leads to neglect.



I don't have these problems.
Not even with my most unwanted of obsessions.

I don't know why.
My own impulse is to mainly keep any of my special interests or obsessions to myself, no matter how healthy and safe, popular and trendy, useful or socially acceptable.

If I were socially motivated myself, I would've brag it outright or be shameful.
But I don't. Maybe being asocial is the difference.

It just stays in my head.
The worst it could do for me is getting distracted, leads to poor time management of jumping into the rabbit holes in the internet, or spending excessively related to whatever obsessions.

Maybe also because I also don't have any anxiety disorders like most autistics do. I also don't have ADHD.
Having it mostly balanced on top of my head than toppling it and ended up dominating my life too much.

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OP, what were your obsessions? Maybe there are FB groups dedicated to them. Otherwise, I'm still curious what they are.

Yes. It could be that the content of the obsession either creeps folks out (like cannibalism), or just bores folks (like an obsession with deep fat fryers). Or it could be the way you talk about the topic. A young lady I used to know was obsessed with dogs. And if she went on a trip she would talk about "seeing" different breeds of dogs the excited way that most folks would talk about seeing celebs. She would say "I saw a golden retriever" the way most folks might say "I was in Beverly Hills, and I saw Tom Hanks...the REAL Tom Hanks!". On online message boards of the time she came off as super geeky and weird. And often got bullied online for it.

I will talk about going on a hike and seeing bird species, or seeing wild mammal species. But even that requires an explanation first (that you're a bird watcher), and wild animals are more elusive than domestic dogs being walked on the beach by their owners. So its more of a thing to see one.

Totally about context.

Obsession with cannibalism: turn-off

Obsession with botany: a-ok!

When I had obsessions and constantly talked about them to others, I wasn't blissfully unaware that they were bored or disinterested, and I even knew they wouldn't be interested even before introducing them to my obsession (except in very small doses), but the impulsiveness was way too intense to resist and because it was an obsession, nothing else in the world interested me, being so my mind was taken over by the obsession. How can you talk about grades and fashion and whatever else your peers share as an interest when all your mind is full of is your obsession with these particular few people? My mind was like a computer with a malware virus that takes over all your apps.
Let's just call the person I was obsessed with Jack.
My mind was like:-
Grades: Jack.
Friends: Jack.
Family: Jack.
Homework: Jack.
Work: Jack.
Driving: Jack.
Interests: Jack.
Favourite colour: Jack.

Yep, that's how severe it was.

I'd rather have my obsessions than fair-weather friends who would leave me over them. As for "facebook" friends? Most of the time they are not.

As long as your obsessions aren't negatively affecting your own life (or are like...something gross and probably unmentionable on these boards), there's nothing wrong with having them.

If people decide to stop being your friend just because of your obsessions? That's their loss, you shouldn't have to change to cater to them.

I don't care if people have obsessions.
That doesn't mean they have to talk about them non-stop.
That's two different things.
The most brilliant minds in history had obsessions.