Questioning if my social skills are really perfect

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FranzOren
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26 Nov 2023, 9:46 am

I wonder if my social skills are really perfect than it used to be. Well, my social skills are much better than my childhood and adolescence, but when I communicate with adults or to people close my age, I behave as if I don't know how to socialize and ask questions that confuses others. For example, when I try to communicate with people on Discord even, I ask social skills related questions that is supposed to be easy for me to understand. I especially don't understand what people are saying unless it's part of my restricted interests. I know how to read facial expressions and I follow most social rules.

I was too confident that I have NT social skills, but I am far from that. I was so confused.

I wonder if anyone is on the same or similar situation as me.



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26 Nov 2023, 9:56 am

Nobody automatically knows the language used by a small community.
I started with what I read in books and as a kid, listened to adults talk.
Perhaps that is missing.
You don't have an opportunity to just listen quietly as a kid and learn the language.

Social skills have gotten worse with Covid Isolation. Normal people haven't been able to interact in person.
Some older people still have fears due to the danger to older people



FranzOren
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26 Nov 2023, 9:59 am

That makes sense.



colliegrace
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27 Nov 2023, 12:05 am

I think one common thing is that we tend to think we're doing better socially than we actually are. That has been my experience: that I need an outside perspective to really know how my social skills are doing


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Edna3362
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27 Nov 2023, 12:21 am

I never assumed that I ever have perfect social skills.
Because I don't have perfect language and emotional regulation.

More like I'm certain that I don't give a damm about it.


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FranzOren
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27 Nov 2023, 11:34 am

That makes sense.



CockneyRebel
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30 Nov 2023, 1:31 am

I don't think anyone has perfect social skills whether they're NT or autistic.


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FranzOren
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30 Nov 2023, 3:02 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:
I don't think anyone has perfect social skills whether they're NT or autistic.


What I meant to say is that my social skills doesn't naturally come as it should overtime.



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30 Nov 2023, 8:32 pm

I'm 65 and I don't even have "OK" social skills. I learned enough masking to stay out of trouble, but I gave up on non-mandatory socializing in high school.


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FranzOren
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01 Dec 2023, 7:56 pm

Campingbare wrote:
I'm 65 and I don't even have "OK" social skills. I learned enough masking to stay out of trouble, but I gave up on non-mandatory socializing in high school.


I only partly mask my symptoms of ASD.