Advice on friend with AS

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I'm not an expert by any means but my best friend of 15 years exhibits at least 90% of the characteristics of AS. He is an amazing, funny individual who is often misunderstood by others.

He is 30 years old and is extremely stubborn and resistant to change. He has never been in a relationship and always says the wrong things when the chance arises. I always made excuses that he was just awkward but I think AS is a strong possibility and I need advice.

I feel that if I confront him, he will get defensive and shut me out. I also worry that he will be extremely resistant to professional help. He has a strong relationship with his mother and I have also thought about speaking with her about it as well.

Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks!

Outright suggesting that he has Asperger's might not be such a great idea. Read up on it a bit and start offering suggestions and giving insights based on what you learn. If he eventually asks about your newfound insight into his psyche, then it might be safe to tell him about it.

I don't think talking to his mom is a good idea either, even if they do have a good relationship. It might make him feel like he's being ganged up on.

This might sound a bit crazy but do you guys talk online much? There are a bunch of online quizzes friends and I procastinate with by linking to each other, if you were say joking around with him linking quizzes, and eventually bought up an AS test, he might see all his characteristics summed up. It's how I got some of my more introverted friends to take it to see if maybe it's just something we're all similar in, but they all scored heavily NT so somehow those quizzes are doing something right. (from my experience with them)

This is a hard one. My mum had been dropping hints that I might have it for years - and I had been getting offended for years! - before I eventually decided to research it.

I think Spot17 has the right idea - talk to him and give him advice on any problems he has that takes into account him possibly having AS. A lifelong friend that he feels he can be himself around could well be of a lot more value to him than any 'professional help'.

Thanks everyone This is all great advice!