jealous of other people's successes
I seem to think that everyone aspires to achieve everything in their twenties before they are 30 and for someone like me of that age (30) it makes me feel inferior and quite like a failure, and an underachiever and that I have wasted my time up to now for example still frustratingly not having finished my book I'm trying to write because of changing ideas. The envy grows when I hear people younger than me already in their early twenties or mid twenties and are already owning their own businesses, and are high level business managers and it makes me think 'Why am I not doing that ?' and 'How come they are there already?' A part of me responds 'Well, they may have to work hard in order to get to where they are now and maybe went straight into work after leaving school.' When I was still studying at college and for four months at uni I didn't have a job because I thought it would be too much to deal working in shop and studying at the same time.
I seem to think everyone else under 30 out there has got their life careers already except me.
It does bizarrely even get on my nerves when they mention the number 30 as though it still implies that youth has ended and now already in middle age.
During my junior year, the choir people at my school took a trip to Florida, with disney world being a part of that. One of my teachers chaperoned and when they came back she told us about how great it was, among other things that I don't remember. This made me feel inferior to the people who went on the trip, so I left a note in the room saying I was upset and went to the office. The teacher met me in the office, apologized, and thanked me for letting her know how this made me feel. She also said "I wish you could see yourself thru my eyes, because to me, you are enough", among other things. It was a very touching moment. I almost cried typing that.
_________________
Early 20s male with Asperger’s and what feels like a mood disorder
My post was deleted twice, because I spend way too long writing about this. Let me shorten it way down.
I feel the exact same way at times, but I always remind myself that...
No one is perfect. Nobody.
Bill Cosby and Harvey Weinstein looked successful, but they were sexual predators.
Tom Cruise and Nicholas Cage were successful movie stars, but one became a scientologist, while the other ended up with massive debt.
Robert Downey Jr. is quite successful now, but he used to struggle with drugs and once ended up in jail.
Long story short, something is always going on in the background, we just can't see it from our angle.
_________________
AQ:41
EQ:86
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 130 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 63 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
auntblabby
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Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,737
Location: the island of defective toy santas
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