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do you believe meltdowns can be outgrown.
Poll ended at 12 Feb 2016, 6:46 pm
yes 17%  17%  [ 5 ]
no. but it less as you get older. 66%  66%  [ 19 ]
maybe 17%  17%  [ 5 ]
Total votes : 29

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Deinonychus
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02 Feb 2016, 6:46 pm

do you or no?


i heard its a life long as well bc of aspergers.

i have also heard it can be outgrown.


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beakybird
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02 Feb 2016, 6:54 pm

I never have fully outgrown them myself, but have found much better ways of controlling them.

Knowing what triggers them and planning accordingly is the first step. Avoidance is good if possible, but too much avoidance can ruin your life.

I try to visualize possible situations where I can meltdown ahead of time by knowing my triggers and desensitizing myself to something I'm about to encounter. This helps.

Being married to a woman who has lost patience with my meltdowns gives strong motivations to swallow the feeling down. Sometimes I still can't. But it does get better if you work at it.



btbnnyr
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02 Feb 2016, 8:28 pm

I think you can outgrow meltdowns.
One aspect is improve emotional regulation as you get older.
Another is actively learning to regulate emotions over time.


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ProbablyOverthinkingThisUsername
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03 Feb 2016, 12:11 am

My meltdowns kind of morphed into depressive episodes, so in a way, yes?



Dwarvyn
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03 Feb 2016, 7:21 am

I don't know that you ever really grow out of them.

I think you can usually learn through experience what is most likely to cause them and what is most likely to lower their intensity and/or duration, and thus avoid triggers and seek out the help you need. In general, you also have more freedom to give yourself these allowances as you get older (for example, as a kid you'd have to eat what your parents cook; as an adult you can choose what you are going to eat, possibly reducing the likelihood of a meltdown due to food sensitivities).

If I feel that I'm slipping into a meltdown or shutdown, for example, I can usually at least delay it if not avoid it altogether if I go engage in a special interest for a couple hours. The focus helps me calm down. When I was a kid, that wasn't really something I had the option of doing, mostly because my parents didn't really think my interests were important, and that I should only be doing them for a certain amount of time before I go do something actually important (like socializing...).



BirdInFlight
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03 Feb 2016, 7:49 am

I'm starting to feel that under certain circumstances they can actually get harder to avoid or manage as you get older, such as when under increasing stress as middle age and older age progresses, menopause adding to a woman's stress load of challenges, life crises, and later life burnout.

Not saying everyone will experience that, because not everyone will. But personally I'm finding it to be so.



EzraS
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03 Feb 2016, 8:08 am

For more severe autism I would say not outgrow them, but maybe develop better controls to a degree. These days I'm not set off quite as easily and I can recover faster in some instances. I believe a lot of cognitive and occupational therapy has helped me with this.



beakybird
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03 Feb 2016, 9:04 am

BirdInFlight wrote:
I'm starting to feel that under certain circumstances they can actually get harder to avoid or manage as you get older, such as when under increasing stress as middle age and older age progresses, menopause adding to a woman's stress load of challenges, life crises, and later life burnout.

Not saying everyone will experience that, because not everyone will. But personally I'm finding it to be so.


This is also true. Even though I'll never be menopausal (thank god) the fact that "real" difficulties are constantly present makes the "lesser" things that would typically trigger an outburst seem less severe. So I'm better able to keep it together when facing a long wall of brake lights because I got so much other stuff to worry about it sort of shorts out the energy I would even have for an outburst.

Like someone else said too, I've found my outbursts have sort of morphed into more frequent depressive episodes. Which, for me, is a more desirable negativity. I'd rather be depressed than flip out and break things or potentially hurt myself.



skibum
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03 Feb 2016, 9:08 am

I don't remember having meltdowns so much as child. If I did they were disciplined as tantrums. When I was a child I had a lot of shutdowns though and a lot of time of escape. I would play alone in my room a lot. But as I got to be an adult I started having more and more meltdowns. As the pressures and responsibilities of life increased and I did not have places to escape, I started having a lot of meltdowns. Now that I know I am Autistic and understand what is happening, I am aware of many of my triggers and I have fewer meltdowns now than before. But I still have them. I don't think I will ever "outgrow" them but the better I can control the triggers in my environment, the fewer meltdowns I will have.

I did not do the poll because there was not an appropriate option for me.


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Ettina
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03 Feb 2016, 7:56 pm

Some people outgrow them. Most don't.



Agustin
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03 Feb 2016, 8:04 pm

I had a meltdown a few days ago and it wasn't pleasant. I do not believe I will ever out grow them, but I rarely ever have one.



nuttyengineer
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03 Feb 2016, 11:16 pm

As I just had the worst meltdown that I've had in quite some time, I'm going to say no. However, you can learn to manage them. For instance, I was able to hold it back long enough to finish out the work day and then let it out once I got home.


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TheBadguy
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03 Feb 2016, 11:46 pm

I don't know if I just haven't learned to cope. My meltdowns can be downright horrible mess. But the thing is I am usually laid back and very calm. I am so use to coping with so much already, when I do have a meltdown all hell breaks down.

I haven't figured out yet what my triggers are. But I do know a long period of stress is one of the starts and build up.



DevilKisses
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04 Feb 2016, 12:57 am

I outgrew them. The last time I had a meltdown was when I was twelve.


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rude1
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04 Feb 2016, 1:05 am

I have meltdowns on a lesser scale where I bite myself and cry a little. A year ago I was still having full blown kicking and screaming meltdowns but changing my living situation helped that.


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Ilovesnails
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04 Feb 2016, 10:26 am

I too have found as I've gotten older it's gotten worse. Depending on the day and what's going on I can easily have a melt down every day. If I'm not having a melt down I'm in a depressive state.