I don't want to complain about an autistic child but

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SteelMaiden
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23 Jul 2008, 12:15 pm

I would say noise-cancelling headphones.
Try staying in an intensive care psych ward. The stuff that goes on there nearly killed me last time I went.


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Bradleigh
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23 Jul 2008, 12:17 pm

SteelMaiden wrote:
I would say noise-cancelling headphones.
Try staying in an intensive care psych ward. The stuff that goes on there nearly killed me last time I went.

It sounds scarey.


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Triangular_Trees
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23 Jul 2008, 12:54 pm

Larree wrote:
You have the right to peace and quiet in your own home, and you should not have to put up with that kind of infringement in your living space. Start out nice when voicing your concerns to the kid's parents, but show no mercy when it comes to your personal right to space. I would not put up with that for too long. I fight fire with fire. I LOVE the sound of electric guitars, and I would gladly open my window, aim my speaker at a noisey neighbor's window, and show them who is the god of noise!


Actually that would be like dousing myself in gasoline because I felt the fire I was standing next too was to hot.

And for some reason, I keep forgetting to post this here, but I do have to move soon, within the next few weeks. i don't want to, but god is giving me no choice. I'm not allowed to live alone for the time being, and really shouldn't be alone at all.



LadyMacbeth
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23 Jul 2008, 1:21 pm

Just ask them to keep him inside during certain times of the day.


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KingdomOfRats
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23 Jul 2008, 4:24 pm

Triangular_Trees wrote:
Larree wrote:
You have the right to peace and quiet in your own home, and you should not have to put up with that kind of infringement in your living space. Start out nice when voicing your concerns to the kid's parents, but show no mercy when it comes to your personal right to space. I would not put up with that for too long. I fight fire with fire. I LOVE the sound of electric guitars, and I would gladly open my window, aim my speaker at a noisey neighbor's window, and show them who is the god of noise!


Actually that would be like dousing myself in gasoline because I felt the fire I was standing next too was to hot.

And for some reason, I keep forgetting to post this here, but I do have to move soon, within the next few weeks. i don't want to, but god is giving me no choice. I'm not allowed to live alone for the time being, and really shouldn't be alone at all.

that is good,at least after getting settled should not have the same problem providing do know where the new place is and what its like.


have tried getting assessed by SS for some support?


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equinn
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23 Jul 2008, 5:04 pm

Find a new place to live.

He obviously can't help it and will find some other stim or repetitive behavior that annoys you. As you must know, it is not always preventable unless the child is heavily sedated. I don't feel this should be an alternative.

Find somewhere quieter to live. You have a choice. The boy and his parents do not.
btw- I am shocked at the lack of tolerance. : (

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ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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23 Jul 2008, 9:57 pm

westernwild wrote:
ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo wrote:
I think he should have a drum. When I was a kid all I wanted to do was play drums I loved the drums sooo much no one would indulge me though.

He should have a drum kit.

I went to this arcade recently and played a video game that had a drum pad and cymbal pads and I played drums to these disco songs and "Mickey"

Such fun!


My aspie son LOVED drums almost from the very beginning; I got him his first drum at the age of one and he hasn't looked back since. He's now a drummer for his high school marching band. He loved to bang on things and make up rhythms, as a lot of aspie and autie kids do, so it was perfect. He's considered very talented by the band director and his drum teacher, and has a natural sense of rhythm.


I wanted to be a drummer in a rock band but no one wanted me to have a drum because they thought it would be too loud.

Music is what got me through my hideously painful childhood.



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23 Jul 2008, 10:10 pm

Since simply moving the trash can won't solve the cat yowling, you need to talk to the parents. While stims and such are important outlets for children on the spectrum, most of them can be channeled or redirected as long as there isn't an immediate stress cropping up. Google the address or Zaba search, get a name and a phone number, and call them. Negotiate. Find out the child's schedule, what they feel they can and can't control, what times of day are the most difficult, and what the possibility is of finding a scheduled time that you can work with the necessary quiet. It's one of the funny things about the spectrum, that those on the spectrum are often least suited to being in the same space because despite understanding, the reality is you have your own sensory issues that also need to be respected. As long as you approach it from a desire to reconcile disparate needs, without placing fault on the child, his parents should be willing to work with you.


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1Oryx2
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24 Jul 2008, 12:37 am

Bradleigh wrote:
It could be usesfull like maybe one of those movement detectors that will make a loud noise if he gets close or something. Or you could put a fake version of something that will probably scare him off, plus it could be fun.


Um, making really loud noises could hurt the kid. What if he's hypersensitive to sound? Speaking as someone who is, that would hurt and could lead to a meltdown -trust me, you think he's loud now, a meltdown is way worse.

Please don't scare him.

I know we can be irritating, but please be patent with us. It sounds like the little boy is stimming -try to find something to take the place of this stim.



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24 Jul 2008, 12:39 am

equinn wrote:
Find a new place to live.


It's not that easy to move to a new house. That can be exspencive.



Triangular_Trees
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24 Jul 2008, 11:37 am

This is getting frustrating. I would complain about all the people who aren't reading my posts, but then i'd probably have skipped half the posts in this thread anyway. So in bold underlined text to keep from having to repeat this 500 times

1) I have noise cancelling headphones - they are useless since i can still hear the child even if I also have ear plugs in at the same time

2) I do not care about the banging. I care about the yowling.

3. God is forcing me to move - my epilepsy has returned so severely that I can't live independently
*btw this house is on the edge of the woods in a rural area. Doubt there is a quieter place to live - at least not one that i can afford before becoming established in a career


*Now maybe I'll only have to repeat this another 496 times before people stop telling me to just get noise cancelling headphones, stop worrying about the banging, or move :D



Triangular_Trees
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24 Jul 2008, 11:47 am

Quote:
that is good,at least after getting settled should not have the same problem providing do know where the new place is and what its like.


unforunately yes. Its a place I vowed to never return to with people I vowed to never see again. last month was the first I saw or spoke to my mom in a year, for the 5 years before that I saw/spoke to her twice a year - christmas and easter. now i have to live with her.

I remember her as being abusive, both physically and emotionally, intentionally causing problems amongst people, deliberately giving someone the wrong advice then when they screw up because of it screaming at them that they should have known better than to do it that way, etc...

As soon as I get the go ahead to live alone i'm going to insist on moving into my grandparents vacant house- its been on the market since they died 2 years ago and so far no one wants it. With the price of gas I doubt anyone will ever want it. So it should still be there and my sister was living in it up until this summer. I just hope I can survive until then. I've asked my boyfriends dad to call and check on me periodically while I'm with my mom is don't trust her one bit

Quote:
have tried getting assessed by SS for some support?


Yes but they told me nothing will go through until november at the very earliest. Considering I'm not able to work, and only have $300 to my name - that after borrowing $1200 from friends, something else has to be done. And my medical bills are over $10,000 and growing - that's with insurance, otherwise they'd be close to $100,000

Hard to believe just a few months ago I had enough money in the bank to take all summer off from work, had almost half of the money saved up for a trip to the Netherlands, and had money set aside to help me when i moved for doctoral school isn't it?



ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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24 Jul 2008, 1:17 pm

Triangular_Trees wrote:
Quote:
that is good,at least after getting settled should not have the same problem providing do know where the new place is and what its like.


unforunately yes. Its a place I vowed to never return to with people I vowed to never see again. last month was the first I saw or spoke to my mom in a year, for the 5 years before that I saw/spoke to her twice a year - christmas and easter. now i have to live with her.

I remember her as being abusive, both physically and emotionally, intentionally causing problems amongst people, deliberately giving someone the wrong advice then when they screw up because of it screaming at them that they should have known better than to do it that way, etc...

As soon as I get the go ahead to live alone i'm going to insist on moving into my grandparents vacant house- its been on the market since they died 2 years ago and so far no one wants it. With the price of gas I doubt anyone will ever want it. So it should still be there and my sister was living in it up until this summer. I just hope I can survive until then. I've asked my boyfriends dad to call and check on me periodically while I'm with my mom is don't trust her one bit

Quote:
have tried getting assessed by SS for some support?


Yes but they told me nothing will go through until november at the very earliest. Considering I'm not able to work, and only have $300 to my name - that after borrowing $1200 from friends, something else has to be done. And my medical bills are over $10,000 and growing - that's with insurance, otherwise they'd be close to $100,000

Hard to believe just a few months ago I had enough money in the bank to take all summer off from work, had almost half of the money saved up for a trip to the Netherlands, and had money set aside to help me when i moved for doctoral school isn't it?



Oh yes, the yowling. I got distracted by the drumming because drumming is fun. I am sorry I wasn't paying closer attention, my posts weren't meant to be offensive.

You are moving to your grandparents vacation home? Do you think that will be a better experience? Sorry you had to go through your money :(

Best wishes!



Triangular_Trees
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24 Jul 2008, 2:10 pm

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You are moving to your grandparents vacation home? Do you think that will be a better experience? Sorry


No, not their vacation home. They're dead. The house is an area that was considered the ideal place to live a few years ago because you could live in a small town, but commute to work in either pittsburgh or cleveland. Now with the price of gas who would want an hours commute to work? So I expect the place to be on the market for quite a while.

The third floor of the house is an apartment, and has some furniture due to my sister living there. I'm not sure if any furniture is left on the first two floors as I know they sold most of it during a yard sale.

It would be great because I'd be alone, not living with my parents, who I hate, but still wouldn't have to pay rent and would be close enough to family that I'd have someone to take me to the doctor or grocery store



SteelMaiden
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28 Jul 2008, 12:17 pm

Bradleigh wrote:
SteelMaiden wrote:
I would say noise-cancelling headphones.
Try staying in an intensive care psych ward. The stuff that goes on there nearly killed me last time I went.

It sounds scarey.


The nurses alarms made horrible sounds. But to be honest, I spent my first week of my stay giving nurses many reasons to set the alarms off.
I'm a lot better now, don't worry.


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meesh
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29 Jul 2008, 9:52 pm

I nannied for a family visiting my town for a few days. Their 4-year old screamed just like you're describing. There was nothing they could do to stop it, period. The kid couldn't even stop it, no matter how much he wanted whatever reward was offered. You can go tell the parents about the screaming, but I'm guessing they're 600 times more exhausted by it than anyone else. Ever tried even a simple trip to the grocery store with a kid who screams suddenly at the top of his lungs every two minutes or so?

My best suggestion would be a study cubicle at the library. University libraries often have sound-proofed rooms for group work. You could reserve one for yourself and have utter quiet.