Page 1 of 1 [ 13 posts ] 

06 Jun 2008, 1:27 am

Lately I have been thinking what I am doing is aspie or not or if everyone does this or does that.

Do you ever wonder what you are doing is something anyone would do or what an aspie would do? Or you wonder if anyone would feel that way you feel about something or if aspies feel that way, not non aspies?



Last edited by Spokane_Girl on 06 Jun 2008, 8:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.

cursed_brunette
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jun 2008
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 60

06 Jun 2008, 7:20 am

Every moment of every day... I don't know how to handle most social situations. Their is a fair amount of socializing when you are working & I AM TOTALLY LOST. I just cannot function effiently around people. I can't deal with the cruel behaviors most NT's exhibit. And of course because I have no filter I can't stop myself from saying things like this

"If she were sitting here, would you say that to her face?"

"Please don't talk about people when I am sitting with you."

Then of course I can only imagine what they say when I leave. The only place I am safe is HOME. If I could stay here & never leave I would be fine with that!! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !



MrMark
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Jul 2006
Age: 65
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,918
Location: Tallahassee, FL

06 Jun 2008, 8:48 am

NTs encounter language barriers too. The self-actualized individual recognizes that it is the fault of neither the speaker nor the listener, and persists in attempting to communicate.

Frustration is the result of the belief that there is something wrong with the speaker or the listener. "If only they would...!" "If only I could...!"

Acceptance of self and others can reduce frustration.


_________________
"The cordial quality of pear or plum
Rises as gladly in the single tree
As in the whole orchards resonant with bees."
- Emerson


Josie
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Apr 2008
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 607

06 Jun 2008, 10:32 am

I feel the same way too. I get highly annoyed when I can't understand what someone is telling me. I think anyone would get annoyed if there was a language barrier.



Willard
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Mar 2008
Age: 64
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,647

06 Jun 2008, 1:17 pm

Had this problem several years back, working with a young man from India. Most folks in the workplace seemed to understand him pretty well, but it always seemed to me that he was speaking way too fast for my brain to translate his accent. It didn't help that the work area tended to be rather noisy, too. Every time I had to ask him a question, I would have to have him repeat his answer at least three times before I could make it out. I know it wasn't his fault or mine, but it was immensely frustrating and embarrassing, I felt like a dunce and I'm sure it made him uncomfortable as well. He was a very nice guy, though - there were a few times when things got quiet and there were no interruptions and no pressure, we had normal conversations and I could follow him fairly well, without asking him to repeat everything. So it's definitely a cognitive issue.



krex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jun 2006
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,471
Location: Village of the Damned

06 Jun 2008, 8:12 pm

This IS a cognitive issue and it has been growing as the social service industries hires more and more people from other countries to force down the wages of service workers. My last job working with DD clients was about 80% Lyberian and I could barely understand them and the clients had a very hard time with their accents. That isn't fair for clients or staff to work in an environment that you can't understand the people working there.. Clients have enough difficulty in commnicationg and a need to socialize and communicate their needs to staff.


_________________
Just because one plane is flying out of formation, doesn't mean the formation is on course....R.D.Lang

Visit my wool sculpture blog
http://eyesoftime.blogspot.com/


06 Jun 2008, 8:19 pm

Cognitive issue as in cognitive problems?



equinn
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Apr 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 649

06 Jun 2008, 8:22 pm

cursed_brunette wrote:
Every moment of every day... I don't know how to handle most social situations. Their is a fair amount of socializing when you are working & I AM TOTALLY LOST. I just cannot function effiently around people. I can't deal with the cruel behaviors most NT's exhibit. And of course because I have no filter I can't stop myself from saying things like this

"If she were sitting here, would you say that to her face?"

"Please don't talk about people when I am sitting with you."

Then of course I can only imagine what they say when I leave. The only place I am safe is HOME. If I could stay here & never leave I would be fine with that!! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !


What you say to these people is appropriate. You are making them think twice about gossiping and talking about other people. I think this is wonderful. Don't stop! I do the same and always have done this. The difference is, I don't feel in the least bit guilty about it. People need reminders. If they think I'm obnoxious, so be it. Most times, they do think twice. If they swear at you, you are still right-even moreso. Keep an honest face and others will emulate you or shun you. But, you are making a huge difference in small ways.

equinn



krex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jun 2006
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,471
Location: Village of the Damned

06 Jun 2008, 8:23 pm

I believe so. I know I depend a lot on reading lips to understand what people are saying and I can't do that with many people with accents. Perhaps it is also a matter of auditory processing disorder but I do believe that it is more of as issue for people who are on the spectrum.


_________________
Just because one plane is flying out of formation, doesn't mean the formation is on course....R.D.Lang

Visit my wool sculpture blog
http://eyesoftime.blogspot.com/


06 Jun 2008, 8:32 pm

I have noticed at work people seem to understand what other people are saying even though I don't. If they speak really good English because they know a lot more English words than the others whom I have troubles understanding, and they don't sound gibberish, then I can understand them. I guess other people wouldn't have the same problem I am having at work? They would have just understood them and maybe their moves.



zeldapsychology
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,431
Location: Florida

06 Jun 2008, 9:24 pm

On the topic of Asperger's itself no. I do tend to analyze life thought for example I break down where I'm going to A,B,C,D my family says we'll take things one at a time and I analyze and plan the day out and get stressed easy. (My Nanny didn't care about getting a test done she said oh well I'll just reschedule.) :-) I do kind of smile to myself when I have an AS trait it's kind of funny and I might say well people with Asperger's tend to do that. :-)



Tim_Tex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2004
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 45,518
Location: Houston, Texas

06 Jun 2008, 10:41 pm

Not really.


_________________
Who’s better at math than a robot? They’re made of math!

Now proficient in ChatGPT!


Mikomi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jan 2008
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 753
Location: On top of your TV, lookin' at you funny.

06 Jun 2008, 10:46 pm

Yeah, I overthink things, ad nauseum.


_________________
Curiosity is not a mental illness.
Homeschooling Aspie mom of 2 kiddos on the Spectrum.