Do you experience anger differently then people around you?

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demoluca
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27 Sep 2008, 9:47 am

When I'm 'angry', there is more physical sensation then emotion.

I get these tickly, rising sensations in my legs. I get the same tickly sensation in a very specific part of my brain( I can feel it on the inside). I start to shake/ tremble. I think horrible things about whatever's made me angry. However there is not much emotion to it, just these physical sensations plus the thoughts. Later, when I think about it I get a bit frustrated, but no real 'anger' comes out of it.

Embarrassment is almost the exact same thing, except there is an actual sensation of 'shame' attached, rather then the absence of any emotion at all.

I've never experienced 'fury' or 'rage' or 'pissed-off' or anytihng else like that. I've experienced 'annoyance' in a more traditional way. I've experienced anxiety and a type of passionate sadness in some non-traditional but still there ways.

Do you experience anger(Or any emotion) In some weird way? Is it anything like how I do? If it's different, then how?


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Belfast
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27 Sep 2008, 11:14 am

Just guessing:
Sounds like epinephrine/adrenaline coursing through system, as preparation for reaction. I get that sensation of "shooting" jolt in my wrists when I almost drop something, for instance-have to react quickly, and even if I catch the item, still feel the weirdness in my body, as it takes time for the chemicals to be dissipate, be reabsorbed by body. It can cause trembling motions in one's limbs, too-I notice it with anxiety (when acute & severe).

As for anger, I get mad then get sad. First, I scream & yell my frustration & fury, then I feel guilty for being so explosive or harsh, and I start crying. Some folks I've known say it's opposite for them-that they're first sad, then mad.

I don't always visibly display my bad moods (incl. mad/sad), can on occasion just go silent & people wonder what's happening with me-when I don't feel "in control" enough to let any of it out around them-so I may seem placid/calm externally, on surface.


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2ukenkerl
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27 Sep 2008, 11:33 am

I have the SAME! I am 3 times more likely to laugh than I am to yell.



ToughDiamond
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27 Sep 2008, 6:49 pm

Yes I can often laugh where another might shout - it's a slightly dark laugh though.

Not aware of any physical signs, except sometimes feeling hot. But that can be from stress or frustration also.

Anger's a difficult emotion for me. I tend to feel I never have permission to show it, and I don't recognise it in myself readily, though often I can realise it later. In the past it's come out as strangely dark comments, and there's been some very long time delays which have confused people. Often it's a request to remove the source of the anger, delivered cold and slightly ominous. It's hard for me to measure anger out appropriately.

I sense that I have a lot of defenses to stop people making me angry too often. I think I'm strangely adept at sarcasm.

When I had to negotiate through a series of problems with my ex-wife, somebody present told us later that we both kept degenerating into sniping, though at the time I'd just assumed the ex was being impossible and any sting in my replies were justifiable. The suggestion was that neither of us had really got over the separation at the time.

I'm quite good at bitching, damning and belittling, but only against people I see as a serious threat to me or my ideals, or against nebulous groups and powerful people. I love to highlight the mistakes of aggressive leaders. I don't like it when anybody tries to run any ordinary person down to me or mock them, the "lets agree to hate this one" thing.

I've recently got rather better at doing anger more naturally, though it's still probably the hardest emotion for me.

I think it's probably more a matter of pride with me, don't like to think anybody else can make me angry, though I might complain to them later - "you pissed me off when you did that."



makuranososhi
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27 Sep 2008, 9:02 pm

There is what can best be described as a physiological rage, where the body leads and the rest follows. It is not a comfortable feeling.


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Carbonhalo
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27 Sep 2008, 9:39 pm

I only ever seem to be angry with myself these days....but it's still something that generates an automatic lockdown in public.
I used to (and may still) react to fear with paralysis, but i've learned that forcing fear to become anger will release me.

I used to have rare "berserker" episodes. The world turns red and all I can see is the object of my hatred.
I once came to with one claw embedded in someones face while I was punching him in slow motion... then realised it was slow motion because I was hauling back and forth the four people holding onto my arm.
Then came the comprehension... and the self loathing... and the self destructive behaviour.

I haven't had one of those episodes since I limited my alcohol consumption and started self medicating. :D



Tahitiii
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27 Sep 2008, 10:18 pm

ToughDiamond wrote:
When I had to negotiate through a series of problems with my ex-wife, somebody present told us later that we both kept degenerating into sniping, though at the time I'd just assumed the ex was being impossible and any sting in my replies were justifiable. The suggestion was that neither of us had really got over the separation at the time.
I wouldn't take that too seriously. People see what they want to see. They read me wrong more often than not and project their own issues onto me. Even when they do see things correctly, they like to play the "share the blame" game, as though there's always two sides to every argument. That might be true most of the time, but obviously not all the time.
How old are you? Some of what you say sounds vaguely familiar.

I have a different reaction to anger, too, and I'm not sure how to describe it. It's as though the adrenaline doesn't kick in properly. I can still be rational, but I sometimes chose to pretend that I'm out-of-control because it gets the point across. Otherwise, no one notices that I'm angry. It takes a lot of energy. And you have to get the timing right. More often than not, I miss the chance or skip it, and later regret being such a wimp.

Same thing with fear. I'm been in a few spots that I believed at the time were life-threatening, but I was still clear, practical and philosophical. The serious heart-pounding doesn't kick in until later.

Carbonhalo wrote:
I used to (and may still) react to fear with paralysis, but I've learned that forcing fear to become anger will release me.
That sounds familiar, too. But I doubt that it is strange. I've heard that the ability to turn grief (pray) into rage (predator) is what separates us from the animals. I think it's a semi-conscious choice in most humans.



ToughDiamond
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28 Sep 2008, 7:15 am

Tahitiii wrote:
How old are you? Some of what you say sounds vaguely familiar.

3 years older than you.

Quote:
I have a different reaction to anger, too, and I'm not sure how to describe it. It's as though the adrenaline doesn't kick in properly. I can still be rational, but I sometimes chose to pretend that I'm out-of-control because it gets the point across.

I think with me, I have a problem with showing ANY anger, unless it's crystal clear that it's justified. I probably get a lot of it out of my system in the form of - er - "satirical comments." And singing - that's much louder than I'd care to shout. I never did get the hang of raising the roof, though I get the validity of your method of showing anger early. But the whole emotion is so invisible to me, most of the time.



PunkyKat
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28 Sep 2008, 9:26 pm

Anger is like my main emotion. I fly off the handle at the slightest offence that is not even an offence at all. People are actualy scared of me because I can get really violent when provoked. My neice who was living with us once learned that fact about me quick.



CMaximus
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28 Sep 2008, 11:09 pm

I shake and can't think, my voice cracks and i get a sort of tunnel vision, losing awareness of my surroundings.

Generally i try not to get that upset, but...



WonderWomen
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28 Sep 2008, 11:18 pm

i try not to get upset either but there is this one guy that I met on this site

he sent me an email last week and he is asking why i won't contact him anymore

i told him not to email me anymore from my personal email account

would you get upset if i did that to any of you?
did i do the right thing?



Rainstorm5
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29 Sep 2008, 11:40 pm

CMaximus wrote:
I shake and can't think, my voice cracks and i get a sort of tunnel vision, losing awareness of my surroundings.

Generally i try not to get that upset, but...


Same here, but that's just when I gt 'upset,' like how I feel when I'm unfairly verbally attacked or put-upon. If I get really, really angry (which thankfully doesn't happen very often because it takes a LOT to piss me off), I feel an adrenaline surge through me and I have no choice but to release it, either with uncontrollable screaming or if really pushed, physical violence (I'll shove/hit people or throw things at them). They usually hit me back, but I won't feel it until an hour or so later after the event has occurred. Like CMaximus describes, above, I get tunnel-vision and nothing else exists in front of me except whatever or whoever it is I'm angry at. Normally I just start crying or walk away, but occasionally if I'm cornered and people won't leave me alone, that's when I get violent. It's probably happened maybe 4 or 5 times in my entire life where I've gotten that angry. Fortunately, the worst damage I did was only to myself.


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