Would you attempt to talk someone out of committing suicide?

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What would you do?
Attempt to talk him out of committing suicide 79%  79%  [ 69 ]
Let him do whatever he wants. It's his life. 21%  21%  [ 18 ]
Total votes : 87

Mw99
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21 Dec 2008, 11:18 am

If someone told you he wants to kill himself, what would you do? Would you try to talk him out of committing suicide or let him do whatever he wants?



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21 Dec 2008, 11:29 am

I have before when someone I knew on MySpace posted a bulletin about how she was going to kill herself the next day. Of course I later realized that she probably wasn't really going to and was just attention whoring. She was like 14 and always posted things like that, so I should have known. :/



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21 Dec 2008, 11:42 am

Same here. I volunteered for a telephone hot line service, and regularly got calls from the same person (another teenaged girl) threatening suicide. The first few times, I went strictly "by the book" - verify intent, listen empathetically (as best I could), and make a referral. After a while, it became apparent that she was a seeking attention more than a resolution, and I told her so when she called again.

When I reported this to my supervisor, she told me that this girl was well-known to the staff, and that she was surprised that I had taken as many calls as I did from her before calling her bluff.

I will certainly try to talk someone out of a suicide attempt, but when it becomes obvious that their threats are more cries for attention than help, I am temped to tell them, "Just do it, then."

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ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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21 Dec 2008, 11:45 am

I have crisis intervention training. When someone is suicidal what you should do is talk to him/her about feelings and listen to what him/her has to say. If they already took an overdose call 911 and get an ambulance to take them to the ER.
If they are just thinking about it and are reaching out to you, reflect what they say back to them: "You are upset about so and so and now you feel like killing yourself" that kind of thing...



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21 Dec 2008, 11:53 am

Yes, I would if I could. Sometimes I think it may be a cry for help and sometimes it can be that life seems unbearable, but I've been there in the past and have read posts here saying that other members have felt suicidal at some point in their lives when depressed or having problems. I don't think that free will enters into it here, except as a theoretical point...if I could stop someone killing themselves, I definitely would.



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21 Dec 2008, 11:56 am

ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo wrote:
I have crisis intervention training. When someone is suicidal what you should do is talk to him/her about feelings and listen to what him/her has to say. If they already took an overdose call 911 and get an ambulance to take them to the ER.
If they are just thinking about it and are reaching out to you, reflect what they say back to them: "You are upset about so and so and now you feel like killing yourself" that kind of thing...

Yeah ... the "Empathy" model.

I really wasn't suited for work at "The Listening Ear," but it sure looks good on the old résumé!


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21 Dec 2008, 11:57 am

I HAVE! By the end, I am always wishing I hadn't bothered, and that they just killed themselves. They try to bring ME down, etc. So I am generally THROUGH with that!



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21 Dec 2008, 12:04 pm

If I personally knew them, I'd go to their house, beat on the door for hours if that's what it took until I was let in, then I sit down and have and just stay and talk with them, stay with them, for days if I have to, until I am convinced that they will not take their life. That is what it takes.



Padium
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21 Dec 2008, 12:07 pm

My answer: Yes, and I have.



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21 Dec 2008, 12:13 pm

God, yes. I'd do more than talk, and try to stop them.

The only circumstances I wouldn't go to help, is with a terminally ill person who can meet the requirements of a physician assisted suicide or a suicide bomber.

Suicide bomber: any terrorist or random-violence person who wants to kill people as they go is welcome to take themselves out. I'd just want to protect others they might hurt.



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21 Dec 2008, 12:15 pm

It depends. If it's someone I know, then yes. If it's some random person on the internet, I couldn't care less.


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21 Dec 2008, 12:15 pm

have done something similar-tried to help someone see how nice they were [she is one of the nicest members on there] and to get through their suicidal thoughts,on another forum,as she has supported am through some bad times,and have reported a WPers attempted suicide to mods before,because the member is a part of WP.
am protective of the things that make up the two main online communities am visit,and offline-the home live in,though dont feel any attachment to any of it.

wp has been wrongly blamed for 'not doing anything about it', [think it led to legal crap,cant remember] eg;member-william freunds' eventual shoot up and suicide, but there's very little can do for online threats,unless forums start making people give their home addresses,but then that would make the forum staff responsible for peoples lives,not good.
people get in trouble with police if they let someone kill themself.


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21 Dec 2008, 12:22 pm

I have seen first hand too many times what it does to people (not the person committing suicide... the people around them) and as such I'd consider it a duty of sorts to at least tell someone they trust that can try to convince them otherwise. I'm not a very convincing person and I don't think I'd be the best at it, but I know I could help in some way.


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21 Dec 2008, 12:36 pm

Talk them out of it, don't let them go through with it.

Suicide is one of those topics that has always just disturbed the hell out of me, for whatever reason. My mother has spent most of her life threatening suicide when things didn't go her way, and one night a couple of years ago, she actually came quite close to doing it when she was evicted from her home and had nowhere else to go. She told me and my wife the next day that she would have done it that night but she just couldn't bear the thought of doing that to the three children she raised.

Having had friends and classmates take their own lives over the years, it's just a subject that bothers me. But I'm no good at helping people because I'm brutally honest, even when I'm trying my hardest to say nice things to someone. I have never been good at comforting people, but I would definitely try my hardest to talk someone out of taking his/her own life.



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21 Dec 2008, 12:41 pm

usually people who talk about wanting to kill themselves arent serious, they want you to talk them out of it. because they are lonely, but if i had a friend and it was out of the norm for him to talk about suicide i'd have no problem trying to talk him out of it


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ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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21 Dec 2008, 1:24 pm

richardbenson wrote:
usually people who talk about wanting to kill themselves arent serious, they want you to talk them out of it. because they are lonely, but if i had a friend and it was out of the norm for him to talk about suicide i'd have no problem trying to talk him out of it

I read somewhere that isn't true. People who talk about it and go into detail about a plan are very serious and might actually try to kill themselves.