People who let their kids run around in stores

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Twilightprincess
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23 May 2022, 4:12 pm

Fnord wrote:
Pteranomom wrote:
ToughDiamond wrote:
Babies do make a lot of noise and it takes them a while to learn self-control, so keep them out of the place till they have.
Babies are human beings and cannot help making baby sounds. Age is an inherent trait that people have no control over, just like sex, race, or disability, and babies have as much right to be in public as men and women, black and white people, abled and disabled people. You would not like it if someone said that you should be hidden away because of some trait you couldn't help.
Would you then let your children run around freely in a store or restaurant?  Good parents teach their children proper behavior when in public before inflicting them on others.


There are all sorts of disabilities and situations which can make “proper” behavior almost impossible.

Parents can be good and not have perfect children.


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AprilR
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23 May 2022, 4:15 pm

Twilightprincess wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Pteranomom wrote:
ToughDiamond wrote:
Babies do make a lot of noise and it takes them a while to learn self-control, so keep them out of the place till they have.
Babies are human beings and cannot help making baby sounds. Age is an inherent trait that people have no control over, just like sex, race, or disability, and babies have as much right to be in public as men and women, black and white people, abled and disabled people. You would not like it if someone said that you should be hidden away because of some trait you couldn't help.
Would you then let your children run around freely in a store or restaurant?  Good parents teach their children proper behavior when in public before inflicting them on others.


There are all sorts of disabilities and situations which can make “proper” behavior almost impossible.

Parents can be good and not have perfect children.


This is true but it's also a fact that some parents are too lazy and irresponsible to actually educate their children on how to behave in public



Twilightprincess
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23 May 2022, 4:17 pm

AprilR wrote:
Twilightprincess wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Pteranomom wrote:
ToughDiamond wrote:
Babies do make a lot of noise and it takes them a while to learn self-control, so keep them out of the place till they have.
Babies are human beings and cannot help making baby sounds. Age is an inherent trait that people have no control over, just like sex, race, or disability, and babies have as much right to be in public as men and women, black and white people, abled and disabled people. You would not like it if someone said that you should be hidden away because of some trait you couldn't help.
Would you then let your children run around freely in a store or restaurant?  Good parents teach their children proper behavior when in public before inflicting them on others.


There are all sorts of disabilities and situations which can make “proper” behavior almost impossible.

Parents can be good and not have perfect children.


This is true but it's also a fact that some parents are too lazy and irresponsible to actually educate their children on how to behave in public


That’s true, but I prefer a stance of nonjudgment unless I see something reportable because one can’t know the full story from a brief encounter. Parents of difficult children receive enough judgment as it is.


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Fnord
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23 May 2022, 4:22 pm

Twilightprincess wrote:
. . . Parents of difficult children receive enough judgment as it is.
Usually in the form of invoices for goods their children break before the goods are sold.



Twilightprincess
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23 May 2022, 4:27 pm

Fnord wrote:
Twilightprincess wrote:
. . . Parents of difficult children receive enough judgment as it is.
Usually in the form of invoices for goods their children break before the goods are sold.


My son and I never broke anything at a store despite being terrors in stores, actually. As an adult, I accidentally broke a jar of pickled onions and wasn’t charged. I also wasn’t charged for a replacement of a large cup of coffee I spilled a couple of weeks ago.


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Last edited by Twilightprincess on 23 May 2022, 4:28 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Joe90
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23 May 2022, 4:28 pm

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You would not like it if someone said that you should be hidden away because of some trait you couldn't help.


Many autistics have been told that, or at least made to feel that way.

Just because a baby can't help it doesn't mean to say they're not irritating as f**k. As long as I'm not hurting one or telling the parents that they shouldn't be out with their baby.

I can tolerate people with disabilities. Babies are just f*****g EVERYWHERE, everyone and their brother has one when you're trying to do your shopping, and they're always crying really loudly.

Human babies are the LOUDEST babies on the planet.


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Fnord
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23 May 2022, 5:00 pm

And woe be unto the person whom the unruly child runs into.  As certain as the stars shine, the parents will accuse the person of deliberately harming the child, upon which either a fight will ensue or a lawsuit will be filed against the person, the store, the manager, and the owners of the store chain.

Some people should never be parents.



Twilightprincess
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23 May 2022, 5:07 pm

Fnord wrote:
And woe be unto the person whom the unruly child runs into.  As certain as the stars shine, the parents will accuse the person of deliberately harming the child, upon which either a fight will ensue or a lawsuit will be filed against the person, the store, the manager, and the owners of the store chain.

Some people should never be parents.


This will happen “as certain as the stars shine?” In my experience, parents of difficult children know they are difficult because they have to live with them and would understand the situation. Of course, that’s not always the case, but I think we should be realistic.


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Joe90
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23 May 2022, 5:14 pm

Fnord wrote:
And woe be unto the person whom the unruly child runs into.  As certain as the stars shine, the parents will accuse the person of deliberately harming the child, upon which either a fight will ensue or a lawsuit will be filed against the person, the store, the manager, and the owners of the store chain.

Some people should never be parents.


When I was a kid most supermarkets had a rule where children weren't allowed to run around, for those exact reasons. If we did run up and down the aisles, we were told off by staff. And kids listen better when they're being told off by someone other than their parents. It worked on us.
Actually in those days me and my brother would wait outside, even when I was as young as 4, but nowadays children can't wait outside stores any more because of more child abductions that go on. (God knows who'd want to abduct one of those for).


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ToughDiamond
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24 May 2022, 2:32 am

Pteranomom wrote:
Babies are human beings and cannot help making baby sounds. Age is an inherent trait that people have no control over, just like sex, race, or disability, and babies have as much right to be in public as men and women, black and white people, abled and disabled people. You would not like it if someone said that you should be hidden away because of some trait you couldn't help.

I don't think you read what I'd written very carefully. There's a difference between what I suggested and hiding a disabled kid away from the entire world. I said quite clearly that I don't mind a bit of give and take, and object only to the extremes. I also suggested they got a friend or relative to look after their disruptive kids while they got their shopping in. Parents choose to have kids, and to my mind one of the responsibilities that accompanies that choice is that they don't inflict them on other people without so much as a by your leave just to make their own lives easier at other people's expense.



munstead
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24 May 2022, 5:22 am

Those kids are now in their twenties, possibly social media influencers!



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24 May 2022, 3:02 pm

I will take a crying and cooing baby over a kid running around and climbing on things.


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24 May 2022, 3:06 pm

ToughDiamond wrote:
I don't think you read what I'd written very carefully. There's a difference between what I suggested and hiding a disabled kid away from the entire world. I said quite clearly that I don't mind a bit of give and take, and object only to the extremes. I also suggested they got a friend or relative to look after their disruptive kids while they got their shopping in. Parents choose to have kids, and to my mind one of the responsibilities that accompanies that choice is that they don't inflict them on other people without so much as a by your leave just to make their own lives easier at other people's expense.


I agree with this.
Having raised two ND / ADHD toddlers on my own I learned to make outings appropriate to their developmental stage.
If they weren't ready for a shopping trip it means they weren't ready for a shopping trip (likely for sensory reasons).
It was important to start with short trips (5 minutes) to familiar places and build up from there.
There was a time when I had to use a hand-harness whether that's PC or not, but it was for safety and practicality.
It's a major responsibility of parents, not to "control" their children but to teach skills sequentially.



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24 May 2022, 3:16 pm

Twilightprincess wrote:
Fnord wrote:
And woe be unto the person whom the unruly child runs into.  As certain as the stars shine, the parents will accuse the person of deliberately harming the child, upon which either a fight will ensue or a lawsuit will be filed against the person, the store, the manager, and the owners of the store chain.  Some people should never be parents.
This will happen “as certain as the stars shine?” In my experience, parents of difficult children know they are difficult because they have to live with them and would understand the situation. Of course, that’s not always the case, but I think we should be realistic.
I am being realistic.  I know of no parent of an unruly child who would ever let their child be blamed for causing damage, injury, or an accident.  No, it has been my experience that -- according to the parents -- the fault rests solely on the injured party when a child has caused the injury or damage -- blaming their child's victims, as it were.

Example 1: According to the parents, it was not their child's fault for throwing the rock that busted my car's window, but my fault for parking my car in my driveway where a rock thrown by their child could damage my car.

Example 2: According to another set of parents, it was not their child's fault for breaking into my tool shed and stealing my tools, but my fault for not placing a stronger lock on the door of my tool shed to keep their child out.

Example 3: According to still another set of parents, it was not their child's fault for chopping down my rose bushes in my front yard, but my fault for planting my rose bushes where their child could chop them down.

Had I not installed security cameras around my house, and retained a couple of good lawyers, those kids would have gotten away with their crimes, their parents would have not paid for the damages, and I would have had to pay out-of-pocket for the damages those kids caused.



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25 May 2022, 5:14 am

I work at a retail store where customers bring large numbers of children and often allow them to run amok. I think that's one of the reasons our store is always such a mess, making things difficult for us employees. For example, sometimes they pull down the pegs that the shoes hang on and play with them, then leave them on the floor. (Among the massive piles of shoes they tried on.) It's not just the children, either. The store had to lock up the mens' socks and underwear because so many packages were being ripped open and the contents strewn about and/or stolen. Corporate comes in and puts pressure on the employees, judging us by the standards of a "normal" store and deciding it must be our fault everything is such a mess. Then they slash our work hours so there are less employees to clean everything up.



Joe90
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25 May 2022, 6:18 am

Babies and small children are actually the top reason I could never work in retail. Ironically they make supermarkets unbearably noisier than a nursery.


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