Maybe it isn't Asperger's? Stuck in chilldhood?

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Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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21 Feb 2009, 8:46 pm

I'm 16 and I've always been scared of the dark and I get scared about somebody being in my room, in my cupboard or under my bed so I check and make sure that there empty, I also complety hide underneath my quilt leaving just abit of air so I can breathe,
I think alot about my childhood, what went off, concluding the confusing things, and yeah I did have a very confusing and quite a negative start to life and I was always qutie lonely so I guess that's why I try to analys it
My behaviour is qutie eccentric, but I dont think I have ADHD, becasue I just act like a fool and when I think about my weird times I do see myself as a little kid, not someone with ADHD.

I've read about eccentricity and carrying things into your adulthood if somethings gone wrong in your chilhood and I'm abit scared of that, I do think I have that problem, I mean, alot of people will also be scared of the dark aswel but everything seems to point to my mind not being able to develop in some kind of ways, I feel easier and confident acting a fool, being imamture.

But I am also qutie intelligent, but I think that part of me is ok, but emotionally I'm stuck in the past and it's stopping me from getting on in life, I feel held back and I probably need some kind of counselling to let go of it, the label 'Asperger's' has never thought right to me really, I don't know why but I feel that I've been given a label that's just covering up and excusing how I am and I think it's deeper than that.

I remember when I was about four my Dad and I werei n the living room and two guys came in and started rowing with my Dad and kept headbutting him, I told him to stop and got up out of the chair but his friend sat me bac down and I remember the mirror smashing to the floor, me and my Dad were close and I was very happy but then he suddenly went and it all changed (he went to prison for trying to kill my Mum). I was then living at home with my depressed Mum and my Gran had to look after us all because my Mum had a nervous breakdown and I was stigmatized by my Gran for looking like my father and she would keep me in a cupboard if I was naughty which she did apologize for a few months back. I think that is where it started, the change could've maed me anxious and scared becuase I didn't understand everything, I was then put into foster care for a while and then I was reunited with my Dad and I had to learn about what happened when my Dad tried to kill my Mum (I wasnt there to experience it thankflly). Sorry that I;m not very articulate but I hope you get it upto now, I really think that things would have changed for me if none of that happened, if I had a stable childhood, because I find it odd how I get confidence from acting immature and how I find it hard to commicate and be on the same level as others, but I don't feel as though it is Asperger's, I used to wonder why none of this childhood stuff never seemed to affect me except for being uncnfident, ahh I'm not sure, but when I think about it I do think that having all of the change has made me stuck and I know that this being scared really easil won't just go away.
Can I have feedback please?
:)



Ticker
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21 Feb 2009, 11:29 pm

Nothing you said in your post sounds like Aspergers. Sounds like you have an anxiety disorder.



philosopherBoi
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22 Feb 2009, 4:38 am

I am in agreement with Ticker it sounds like you are suffering form abnormal amounts of anxiety. Oh by the way are you quick to anger especially if you don't feel safe, and/or in control?



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22 Feb 2009, 4:38 am

I am in agreement with Ticker it sounds like you are suffering form abnormal amounts of anxiety. Oh by the way are you quick to anger especially if you don't feel safe, and/or in control?



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22 Feb 2009, 7:03 am

Well, you didn't say anything about other issues. What about all those traits associated with AS? Routines, empathy, social skills, sensory issues and so on?


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2ukenkerl
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22 Feb 2009, 8:08 am

The others are right. That isn't even really an AS symptom, and would be a symptom of NO real thing, considering it's cause. It is like saying you have cushings because you overeat and got fat!



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Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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22 Feb 2009, 9:15 am

The only things I have related to AS is that I don't like soft touch, I have no special obsessions



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22 Feb 2009, 1:13 pm

-x-x-ANONYMOUS-x-x- wrote:
The only things I have related to AS is that I don't like soft touch, I have no special obsessions


Yeah but what about extreme social phobia and anxiety, being overly blunt, taking others words literally? When you were a kid did you line things up in neat rows or stack things? Do you have routines that takes hours before you can go out? Do you stim or handflap? Do you meet the majority of the diagnostic criteria on the DSM IV for Aspergers? If not then you probably don't have AS nor anything on the autistic spectrum.



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22 Feb 2009, 5:49 pm

Actually when I was a kid I did line up all of my toys on my bedroom floor, and I do handflap rather alot, but I also think that it is a mix of both, anxiety plus mild Asperger's, but just AS doesn't sit right with me.



dougn
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24 Feb 2009, 3:00 am

Is there any particular reason it "doesn't sit right with you?"

Obviously you've been through a lot of things that could cause problems even for neurotypical people (probably most people who had one of their parents try to kill the other will not come out totally unscathed) but that doesn't mean you don't have AS.



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24 Feb 2009, 7:18 am

Suggestion: deal with emotional problems; when stable, re-evaluate. It can be very confusing to try to diagnose AS in the presence of co-morbid conditions.


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Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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27 Feb 2009, 1:37 am

Yeah, I think it might be AS but with a large dose of anxiety and maybe some other things, thanks people.