Pook wrote:
I can't remember the times people have looked at me like "I thought you were more intelligent then that." or the few times it has outright been stated. It is so demeaning to have people devalue the other abilities I have simply, because I don't fit into the standard mold.
Anyone else come across this condescending NT attitude?
I would say YESSS. But I also know that I often misread people and substitute a negative meaning for something I noticed them do (such as turn away or pause for too long or change the topic, etc).
Exception for my father. He has expressed in no uncertain terms that he's disappointed/disbelieving that I'm not as intelligent as he thought I should have been (because he thought he was highly intelligent and therefore if he was my father that I should be too). He's also the one who point-blank refuses that I have any autism at all and that I'm foolish for labelling myself or seeing a psychiatrist (he's a psychology graduate). (He thinks psychiatrists are stupid.)
I remember many times throughout my life when I tried to do laundry (or something) and failed, and he would get frustrated with me and say the Cantonese equivalent of "foolish." He never tried to make it easier for me - maybe because he has always believed in "if it's not working, you have to do more of it." (eg he's allergic to pollen so he believes he has to immerse himself in pollen to "get over it.") He applied this philosophy to every situation I failed in, as if this was a form of structured punishment that would help me improve, and that the self-deprecating/self-loathing i had would go away when I finally listened to him and got better as a result.
I suspect that's my dad's attitude rather than people's attitudes to me generally (although I really don't know sometimes - see above)... and besides, I don't know if he's really all that NT, lol.
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- Liresse
Last edited by Liresse on 27 Feb 2009, 5:01 pm, edited 2 times in total.