does anyone sometimes feel awkward around people

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ive felt very awkward around certain people like my dad sometimes i find it hard just to mellow out sometimes if i have a conversation with someone i get agitated so i smoke my fag really fast or like tap my hand on a table or something stupid like that can anyone help

I feel awkward all the time around people and it SUCKS! This is my #1 problem! I'm aware of the problem even as it plays out, but to hell if I could do something about it.

At any given time in my life there are usually just a few "handlers" around whom I feel comfortable. My tendency to stick with these handlers and only work through them has made me seem clingy and has probably cost me networking opportunities.

This awkwardness is a major strike against me as far as dating goes, because potential partners expect nothing less than perfection, delivered in the style of James Bond, Crocodile Dundee and the like. That is not going to happen with me.

People have recently called me "ret*d" because of body language issues and said "you couldn't be getting a Ph.D." because I'm not that quick in conversation especially around strangers. Well, OK, so I'm a ret*d with a Ph.D.

I take a long time to warm up to people, even family members. My need to retreat makes me unable to be chatty for extended periods (oxytocin lacking?). I sometimes am unresponsive even to people I care about a lot when in a setting in which I am not accustomed to seeing them (family and friends at my thesis defense). I have failed to recognize people I know well in unfamiliar settings (a friend's mom at the gas station).

i am always drawn to "awks" so i always go in an "awkward" direction.

i know what your mean i sometimes just turn my back on people just becuase i know how the conversations gonna go im going to somehow kill the coversation like i allways do

Like you, I'm very "pick 'n' stick", and the number of people I've been able to connect with would actually be a single digit. Even most people around here who "seem friendly" just come across as glad-handers guarding a sanitised atmosphere of "have a nice day" sycophancy from being challenged by anyone or anything. Recently I've pulled up the drawbridge, so to speak. Just my fiancée and a couple of friends to talk to on a regular basis, and a few others (landlord, boss) that I only deal with on "strictly business" terms. I have no desire to get out-and-about in the quasi-city I live in (essentially a country town with a popuation of 1 million). I only leave my room to go to work, or the supermarket. End of story. Yeah, you bet I feel awkward around other people!

Absolutely, and I know that this fuels stigma problems with us and "normals". I try to defy that awkwardness. With some people, if I think they can handle it, I come right out and tell them that my body language and facial expressions are not accurate and that I have autism. I have had very good luck with this approach, expcept that then they just want to talk about autism, and while I am an advocate and want people to learn, I don't always feel like talking about it.

No one should ever call you a ret*d because of your body language. It's a medical condition that has nothing to do with intellect. I get fairly defensive on that one.

Simply put, we cannot deny ourselves or just conform to what other people want any more than a diabetic can suddenly just start absorbing mass sugar safely. With rising numbers in our community (more than any other) I think that people need to learn more about us and understand that we are not the same old thing they are used to. It may be weird for them, but it's not a cake walk for us either.

Thanks for posting this, it's a good question.

feel awkward standing at a cocktail party where people are talking in two's and three's and i am alone by myself looking around, looking like i am confused and lonely

Is that what that is? It sometimes takes a while to get comfortable around people. I wish you luck.

Ocassionally



Lol just kidding. Only like everyone save... oh... two people?

Yep. To echo the sentiments of others I've only 'bonded' to one person as well; my partner and I have lived fairly isolated from people most of my adult life so far.

Even in a crowd of them their presence makes me incredibly uncomfortable and I start moving jerkily, the sheer number can cause sensory overload and yet I don't understand or can empathise with a single one of them.

Yes. All the time.