does anyone else have a sibling like this?

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Deinonychus
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10 Apr 2009, 11:03 am

When i was younger, i would say that was my sister. Nowadays its more my brother.

my sis and i are closer now for some reason. i can identify with her more i guess.

that being said, i think i am like that sometimes without even noticing it.



PrisonerSix
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10 Apr 2009, 11:59 am

-x-x-ANONYMOUS-x-x- wrote:
Does anyone else's sister/borther delibaratley go out of there way to be as obnoxious, spiteful and confidence crushing towards you? Humiliates you and is manipulative aswell?

She's 18 and I'm 16 by the way.


My sister was like this when I was growing up and it really hurt. She basically thought she should rule over me and everything should be her way. Unfortunately, my parents often backed her against me, or never did anything about it, but came down on me when I would try to fight back.

Come to think of it, my mother was like this too.

I don't have much contact with either of them anymore and am better because of it.


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pensieve
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11 Apr 2009, 1:24 am

My sister was very bossy when we were growing up. We were only a year apart so we had to share things, like bedrooms and meals when we went out.
She would always try to bring me down. She was successful too because I'm a very sensitive person. She would be the primary cause of my meltdowns, and of course my mum yelled at me because I was the one being violent.

I don't live with her anymore, so she's not as bad. She's still as arrogant as ever though. I don't like the adult she's become though; very opinionated and her way has to be the right way, and everyone else is wrong.



desmonami
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11 Apr 2009, 4:05 am

Yep. She likes to get a rise out of me. I am just glad she has effed of to uni! and i only have to tolerate her like once every 6 months at most now.



mechanima
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11 Apr 2009, 6:49 am

SoulcakeDuck wrote:
mechanima wrote:
I have got a brother like that...and he is more Aspie than I am...but in deep denial, and totally into himself...


Guess we know his special obsession. :wink:

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Vanity, it's a Motherf***er...


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Psygirl6
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11 Apr 2009, 7:43 am

My sister, who is 2 years younger than me, always reminds me that I am disabled and even gets Asperger's confused with classic autism. Because I was a child in the 80's, they did not have Asperger's in the states, so I get diagnosed with Autism. I do not even qualify for even high functioning autism, but in the 80's where I lived, All kinds of autism(high functioning included) was considered classic autism. So when my sister was told about my disability when she was 10 in 1988, that is the only thing my parents told her. Ironically, she was the learning disabled one, who just got diagnosed with ADHD in 2008, and had to have "special" resource classes for math, and most of her subjects from 2nd grade til she graduated high school. I was the one who was in the honors classes in high school(only special ed til 2nd grade) and I was the one who was the "golden" child who made her parents proud.
She did not like this, so she got jealous and to this day tries to kill my self-confidence, and tries to get me to be proud that I am disabled and is mad that I am living normal and thinks that I am "faking" being smart. My mom tells me that she is a negative person, and me and mom agree that she grew up thinking that Autistics are supposed to be worse than her, who can not take care of themselves.
Plus to make it worse, In my adult life, I had an emotional breakdown at 20, and was diagnosed with Asperger's, but because it was considered that same as autism, I ended up with inappropriate services, for the autistic mentally retarded, even though I am highly intelligent and more independent than anyone I know. She loved this because she now had even more against me and she is the one who loves to see me fail.
I see if it was when we were kids this could happen, but as adults, this is crazy. I am 30 and she is 28, but because she is immature as she is and still has issues with the fact that I was great in school and that her version of someone with aspergers is an incompetent dummy, who needs to be treated I am brain dead, rather than treated like I am the intelligent person I am.
So this is how my sister gets to me. She not only puts me down, but because I have a disability she thinks I should be treated like I am incompetent and should not live a normal life and is upset that I am leaving the group home to live on my own and that I am going to school to have a successful career. The sad thing is she feels and thinks that way, not because she is worried(and no one should be, even my mom has more confidence in me than she does in her), but because she does not like that someone who she thinks is more disabled than her should not have any success and/or independence, especially having a more successful life than her.



gina-ghettoprincess
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11 Apr 2009, 8:02 am

My brother is younger than me, and he acts like he's the responsible one all the time, when he isn't, he's just a smarmy little kiss-ass who specialises in getting adults to like him by going out of his way to appear helpful and polite. He's a wolf in sheep's clothing, and I'm the only one who sees his true colours.

Once I had to get up for an appointment, and Mum was going to work so I had to be trusted to get up on time for when my dad arrived to take me to the appointment, and I heard my brother offer to tell me when to get up. I flipped out, I was like, "Mum, you tell him that if he DARES come into my room acting like he has jurisdiction over me, I'll tear him a new arsehole!!" She was like, "He was only being helpful," and I'm like, "No he effing wasn't, he was being a condescending little prick! Tell him he's my little brother, not my babysitter!" It made me SO ANGRY, cos he is younger than me, and I hate being bossed around by 11-year-olds, even more than I hate being bossed around by anyone else. :evil:

It sucks being the eldest, because I HAVE to be better than him at EVERYTHING in every way, otherwise he gets all big-headed and arrogant. But if I'm better than him at stuff, it's only to be expected cos I'm older than him. It's so immature and extremely NT, but I have to play the game cos if I don't he develops a superiority complex, and I have to live with that!

Yesterday he was laughing at me cos I didn't know what cupboard the ketchup bottle was in. (I have never needed to know.) Big talk for a kid who thinks the Bolsheviks were a crisp company and Guantanamo Bay is a holiday resort. :roll:

I hate him so much. And I hate my parents for even having another kid. Mum says it's so we learn to share. Welcome to Communist Russia. :roll:


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11 Apr 2009, 8:09 am

pensieve wrote:
My sister was very bossy when we were growing up. We were only a year apart so we had to share things, like bedrooms and meals when we went out.
She would always try to bring me down. She was successful too because I'm a very sensitive person. She would be the primary cause of my meltdowns, and of course my mum yelled at me because I was the one being violent.

I don't live with her anymore, so she's not as bad. She's still as arrogant as ever though. I don't like the adult she's become though; very opinionated and her way has to be the right way, and everyone else is wrong.


You gave a very accurate description of my relationship with my sister, and they way our parents treated us. She was on a pedestal, I was in the garbage. I always thought one day my parents would pay for what they did to me, and they have.

They spent a lot of money on my sister, like 2 new cars, 6 years of college tuition, medical school(which she dropped out of), mental hospitals, psychiatrists, all of whom she told how terrible our parents were to her, which made little sense to me, since she always got her way with everyone thanks to them. In school, my parents got her out of stuff she didn't want to do and one time when she didn't get the grades she wanted, they went to their friends on the school board and her C's got changed to A's, since according to my parents, "She doesn't get C's." She should have gotten punished for her C's like I did, but since they didn't believe in punishing girls, they couldn't do that.

They also pretty much gave her 4 of my summer breaks from school by allowing her to deny me my activities and cram swimming down my throat. She used to say to me and her friends that she owned me and she was going to own me for the rest of my life so I better get used to it because nothing I did meant anything, I was always wrong, she was always right, I was always at fault, since nothing can ever be a girl's fault.

Today, even though she has a decent job, she's a biker, covered in tattoos, and riding motorcycles, something my parents do not approve of. Of course, they threw out their approval of me when I got married, but that's another story.

They were truly hurt by her behavior and I feel absolutely no sympathy for them at all.


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Hovis
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11 Apr 2009, 1:15 pm

My father is like this.

His general rule seems to be that he can be as arrogant and obnoxious towards me as he likes, but if I dare present anything but a smiling, welcoming face to him 24/7, all hell breaks loose. In addition, if I tell him I found what he said painful, I've then committed a double crime and 'hurt his feelings' by accusing him of doing what anyone can plainly see that he is doing.



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12 Apr 2009, 12:03 am

I'm the bossy-manipulative older sister :twisted:

I'm 22, and my siblings are 12 years old.



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13 Apr 2009, 11:45 pm

Thanks for your posts, I guess I'm not the only one putting up with this!
My plan is to have contact with her as less as possible and hopefully she will be gone for good when I go to uni.

:)



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13 Apr 2009, 11:56 pm

-x-x-ANONYMOUS-x-x- wrote:
Thanks for your posts, I guess I'm not the only one putting up with this!
My plan is to have contact with her as less as possible and hopefully she will be gone for good when I go to uni.

:)

These last couple of days with my sister have been hell, and my mum is still taking her side. So I am going to have to have very little contact with her too.



richardbenson
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14 Apr 2009, 2:07 pm

no not really. one of my sisters that lives in case grande can get bitchy. her new favorite line is this, "hating is a disease and b***h your infected" :lol: my other sister is mellow, and my halfsister is a newage punk rocker. my half brother is the outdoorsman and thats about it dudes always hunting or fishing



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16 Apr 2009, 2:03 pm

My siblings aren't deliberately rude to me, but they don't always respect my feelings, either.