The Dino-Aspie Cafe (for Those 40+... or feeling creaky)

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Joined: 27 Jan 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,324

12 May 2007, 3:22 am

Colleen's (better known as Mescaline's) boyfriend, who made mescaline in the room on the floor below mine, is the same guy who loaded a joint with Angel Dust and gave it to my friend, Sue Rataisky. He thought she was taking it to a party. She and I smoked it instead. That was the end of my attempts to smoke pot. Very weird stuff. I remember looking in the mirror and seeing a demon staring back at me. I just wanted to blow my hair dry. Then we tried to watch TV, but that didn't work (even though it was bland stuff like the Love Boat and Fantasy Island LOL). Finally she looked at me and said, "You're scary." I looked at her and she looked like a skull. That was it, we went off to the room across the hall to be with people who weren't on that stuff. The next day we found out what he had done.

About a week later, I found out Mescaline didn't even have a winter coat in Michigan and I gave her one of mine. I felt bad for her.

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People say I'm crazy
doing what I'm doing,
Well they give me all kinds of warnings
to save me from ruin

postpaleo
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12 May 2007, 4:23 am

ZanneMarie wrote:

That kind of creep is not in my nice people book. I've seen that kind before. I could give you more ammo for your story with my thought about him.

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SeaBright
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12 May 2007, 8:09 am

YowlingCat wrote:

This thread is for those of us who are in the 40+ age range, (or folks who feel comfortable in the company of old coots), probably having not been diagnosed for most of our lives. We can share our unique experiences and problems and whatever else we Dino-Aspies do. Welcome!

I am YowlingCat, 54 years old, and diagnosed last year. I have an orange cat named Sagan, who is a sweet butthead. Love science and music and reading. Eighteen years of school, neuropsychology, theatre technology, but no degrees.

Well, that's a start. And you?

I'm SeaBright-feeling creaky and though 36 have always communicated better with the 20+ years over me field of gaffers. I'm adopted from the former soviet union. My credentials read 4 years younger than my body so I could fit into a believable biological family sequence. :evil:

I was clinically diagnosed last year and recieving treatment when I can afford it. However, I know myself to be more HFA than Aspergers if there is a dicernable disparity.

The name comes from my near consuming and sometimes dangerous facination with water. (as well as fire, lightning, wind, dirt, bugs, yadda yadda).

I live alone with my nearing 17 year old son. My apartments do not allow pets or I'd be the local rescue lady guarded by a massive shepard and a rotweiler.

It took me 6 years unemployed to stumble through 2 justice associate degrees from the local community college. My time is spent attempting to live a 'normal' life after a childhood riddled with extreme abuse; as well as researching my roots and the laws that bar me from getting back to them.

My interests are too many to define, but boil down to the pursuit of knowledge itself.

Hi all! :wink:

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"I'm sorry Katya, my dear, but where we come from, your what's known as a pet; a not quite human novelty. It's why we brought you.... It's nothing to be ashamed of, my dear, but here you are and here you'll sit."

sinsboldly
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12 May 2007, 8:33 am

Hello SeaBright!
Welcome to our little corner of the world. I was born into a family of abusers and I have never understood why someone would go t o all the trouble of adopting some one, and from out of country, too, to abuse. (shakes head) and I don't think I WANT to know. sheesh.

I love the sparkle of the sun on the water too, and even better, is when you are in an indoor pool that has the blue green colors flashing up on the walls and ceiling from the lights under the pool. . I could be there for DAYS!
As for pets, I would be the old cat lady if I could have more than one.

we move pretty fast in this thread when it gets going, so hold on and read fast! :lol:

what do you do for work?

Merle

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Alis volat propriis
State Motto of Oregon

Chuck
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12 May 2007, 10:07 am

sinsboldly wrote:

I love the sparkle of the sun on the water too, and even better, is when you are in an indoor pool that has the blue green colors flashing up on the walls and ceiling from the lights under the pool. . I could be there for DAYS!

I do this watching the reflections of water wave patterns moving on the underside of bridges.
Welcome Seabright!

Chuck
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12 May 2007, 10:13 am

Postie: wishing you well with your PTSD progress!

Merle: No more of your boring stories as a tupperware representative, please!! ! Criminy!

Zanne: You too.

sinsboldly
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12 May 2007, 11:08 am

Chuck wrote:

sinsboldly wrote:

I do this watching the reflections of water wave patterns moving on the underside of bridges.
Welcome Seabright!

You could be my silver spring
Blue-green colors flashing
I would be your only dream
Your shining over ocean crashing

-Snip-

Time cast a spell on you
But you won't forget me
I know I could have loved you
But you would not let me

You could be my silver spring
Blue-green colors flashing
I would be your only dream
Your shining over ocean crashing

ooooohhhhh. . .. it just washes over you!

Merle

ZanneMarie
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12 May 2007, 2:13 pm

Chuck wrote:

Postie: wishing you well with your PTSD progress!

Merle: No more of your boring stories as a tupperware representative, please!! !

Criminy!

Zanne: You too.

OMG Tupperware! I remember some well meaning relative of mine gave us tupperware and dh immediately threw it in the trash. Plastic is porous and never gets clean so it's full of carcinogens. I used to laugh, but now that's pretty commonly known. Too funny. His paranoid OCD self was right. Tupperware is verboten!! !!

_________________
People say I'm crazy
doing what I'm doing,
Well they give me all kinds of warnings
to save me from ruin

blessedmom
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12 May 2007, 5:55 pm

Is the Tupperware gone? I can't handle anymore mundane, house-wifey, soccer mom stuff for today! Coffee Dude, Apple Vanilla White Tea, please! Nice to see everyone. Excuse me while I slip into my WP persona!! :wink:

krex
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12 May 2007, 7:29 pm

Postie....I will never understand how an aspie can survive the military,even in non war times....it is my worst nightmare,I have some major meltdowns over catch22 situations and authority with a "because I told you to do it,thats why"...I have to question everything and cant seem to function in illogical environments.....jobs are enough of a challenge with this,and at least you know you have the "option" of quiting them,even if it means you will end up homeless.

I hope you find useful help at the V.A.,it sounds like you like and respect some of the people working there,and that is great.

Hi,Seabright,hadnt seen you around much,glad you are back.

And now for the mundane......my life.

Those that already know my work and insurence situation,I need the wise advice of anyone who can read..."legaleese".

My manager gave me a fax and needs my answer in 24 hours.....it reads as follows,

It is important for Dnise to understand the impact that this correction could have on her benefits.(the correction is that my manager never changed my status from part time to full time and I didnt know why I hadnt received my medical benefits)
If her status is changed back to 2/5/7(when it should have been done)She will be responsible for paying benefit premiums back to the 91st of her employment(which would be 5/2/07)for whatever coverage she selects.This could be anywhere from $200 to over $500.Or,we can make her status change effective 5/7/7 for coverage effective 6/1/07 and back pay premiums will not be an issue.

What does this mean?A co-worker said she pays $15. week for her medical,dental,vission plan and that it is good.Where are they coming up with the $200-500?I have been paying perscriptions out of pocket for past three months and need refills in 5 days(128.00)and need a cavatie filled......even if I elect to pay...."whatever" for back premiums,I still wont have a card for a couple of weeks,so will have to pay out of pocket for now.....will they have to reimburse me if I back pay?

I am not even sure that they HAVE to pay for my meds,as my depression in a "pre-existing condition" for over 5 years and I have been having "bleeding problems" for several years but was only "diagnosed" with a tumor,4 months ago....which date would they consider for "pre-existing".....when I began having problems(2000),or when I actually had the advice to get an untra-sound(about a year ago......I sure can procrastinate)or the date I actually did....4 months.

If I agree to have the start date June 1st,which at least gives them time to actually mail out papaerwork and get my card from them......I will have to pay for meds now and for sure wont be reembersed.

Anyone who understands this stuff.....I would appriciate any advice.I cant seem to get over my anger of feeling "punished" fr something that was beyond my control(My manager not getting my status change in 3 months ago,if she had,I would already have a piece of plastic in my hand and not have to be worrying about this....cripes,I hate this stuff)

Thanks in advance for any input.(and sorry for being such a boring drag)

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blessedmom
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12 May 2007, 8:23 pm

krex wrote:

My manager gave me a fax and needs my answer in 24 hours.....it reads as follows,

It is important for Dnise to understand the impact that this correction could have on her benefits.(the correction is that my manager never changed my status from part time to full time and I didnt know why I hadnt received my medical benefits)
If her status is changed back to 2/5/7(when it should have been done)She will be responsible for paying benefit premiums back to the 91st of her employment(which would be 5/2/07)for whatever coverage she selects.This could be anywhere from $200 to over $500.Or,we can make her status change effective 5/7/7 for coverage effective 6/1/07 and back pay premiums will not be an issue.

What does this mean?A co-worker said she pays $15. week for her medical,dental,vission plan and that it is good.Where are they coming up with the $200-500?I have been paying perscriptions out of pocket for past three months and need refills in 5 days(128.00)and need a cavatie filled......even if I elect to pay...."whatever" for back premiums,I still wont have a card for a couple of weeks,so will have to pay out of pocket for now.....will they have to reimburse me if I back pay?

I am not even sure that they HAVE to pay for my meds,as my depression in a "pre-existing condition" for over 5 years and I have been having "bleeding problems" for several years but was only "diagnosed" with a tumor,4 months ago....which date would they consider for "pre-existing".....when I began having problems(2000),or when I actually had the advice to get an untra-sound(about a year ago......I sure can procrastinate)or the date I actually did....4 months.

If I agree to have the start date June 1st,which at least gives them time to actually mail out papaerwork and get my card from them......I will have to pay for meds now and for sure wont be reembersed.

Anyone who understands this stuff.....I would appriciate any advice.I cant seem to get over my anger of feeling "punished" fr something that was beyond my control(My manager not getting my status change in 3 months ago,if she had,I would already have a piece of plastic in my hand and not have to be worrying about this....cripes,I hate this stuff)

Thanks in advance for any input.(and sorry for being such a boring drag)

Starting the coverage on June 1 would be the best idea, I think. That is only 2 weeks away and you will only be paying the $128.00 for your med. The reason for the back pay is that each week from the 91st day to now, the company would have taken an amount of your pay cheque as your portion for the benefits. They would pay the majority but you still pay a small portion. For example, on my husbands plan they take $35.00 of the first paycheque of each month. That is our payable portion. If they make the coverage retroactive you will have to pay them your portion for those months, even though you haven't been able to use the benefits. It would be a waste of your money.

Did this manager apologize to you at all?

This is a major screw-up that she has made. I'm sure Zanne has more to say than I do, but I hope I've been a little helpful

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ZanneMarie
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12 May 2007, 8:52 pm

krex wrote:

Okay, here's what you need to do. Call whoever wrote this and tell them about the $15 for your co-worker and make them explain. Did you fill out the paperwork to sign up for benefits? It sounds like they have multiple plans with different premiums that come out of your paycheck. Yes, you do have to pay the back premiums if you want coverage to be retroactive to the date you were eligible. The reason they are warning you is because it will probably be taken out in one lump sum in your next paycheck instead of a little at a time as it would have been normally. Since that will be a larger amount, they must warn you so you are not surprised by that (most people have bills they have to pay and depend on their paycheck being the same). So calm down and call the person who sent this fax and have them go through it with you. If you haven't made your selections for insurance, do that first, then call this person and have her (or him) walk you through what that total premium amount will actually be if you are insured from the time you should have been.

Next, you can get your insurance to pay for what you already paid out. Most have an option where you can file a claim for things you spent out of pocket. Your benefits person at work should know about this so ask. You can get that back coverage.

Most employer offered insurance exempts you from pre-existing conditions as long as you sign up when you are eligible or pick it up in mass enrollments. Your benefits person should know for sure, but this is generally how it works. You should verify. Ask when you call. I would be surprised if you weren't covered. It's possible, but not probable.

Last if you go to the doctor or a pharmacy before you get the card, simply have them call the customer service number for your insurance to verify you have it. Ask your benefits person for your insurance companies customer service number and your group ID. They should be able to handle it from there.

If you have any other problems, let me know and I'll try to help you sort it out. I'm pretty good at sifting through policy legalese and I'm happy to help you out.

_________________
People say I'm crazy
doing what I'm doing,
Well they give me all kinds of warnings
to save me from ruin

blessedmom
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12 May 2007, 8:59 pm

I'm glad Zanne could help you. It is so much different in Canada than the U.S.. Our medical coverage always covers pre-existing medical conditions. There is never a question. I have Crohn's colitis and was diagnosed in 1986. When I was thinking of moving to Alabama I looked into all of that and realized I can never leave Canada with my health problems.
krex, I hope you get it all straightened out soon!

blessedmom
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12 May 2007, 9:14 pm

Chuck wrote:

:)
blessedmom, I have no doubt you did a good job with your young'ns.

I got's to go to sleep now - I finally wore myself out.
G'night/G'day all!
Postie! Haven't seen you in a while - hope you are well.
Get yourself a clothespin - what with Leek Festival coming up and all.

It has been bugging me that you may have thought I was mad because anyone was doubting my parenting. It wasn't that. I was angry because there are parents on the forum that criticize new parents who are only seeking understanding. It is terrible. What they think of my parenting is neither here nor there. I watch Monty Python and Eddie Murphy comedy sketches with them for heaven's sake!

I wonder what they would think of that over there! I would be burned at the stake!! :twisted:

blessedmom
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12 May 2007, 9:16 pm

sinsboldly wrote:

blessedmom wrote:

AAHHH! My favorite time of day. Coffee Dude, time to air out the place. I'll put on the morning tea and water the fake plant while I listen to the echoes of last nights conversation. Oh, so peaceful!!

it's an Aspiedistra. . .

What is an Aspiedistra?

ZanneMarie
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12 May 2007, 9:30 pm

blessedmom wrote:

You have so much faith in me! LOL I used to get tons of questions from my staff about benefits. It's confusing here. Too much too choose from and too many rules. No wonder people want to scream.

I just handled State Farm and a contracting company for my sister-in-law yesterday. They tried to intimidate her. uh huh We had a little Come to Jesus Meeting and they saw the light. Now they are fixing everything exactly like it was because they understand that policies are contracts and contract law applies. They just needed a gentle reminder. Translation - they flipped my mother switch and met my mother full on. They don't ever want to see her again. I turned back into Zanne before they left. I think it confused them. Dh just laughed at them.

I even went outside and yelled at the workers and told them they would not talk, they would not even look at me, they would just listen. Then I told them if they wanted to act like they were five, they would be treated accordingly. If they fought with each other or tried to intimidate my sister-in-law again, I would throw them out and they could stay out until they grew up. No further issues. They came to Jesus. :wink:

_________________
People say I'm crazy
doing what I'm doing,
Well they give me all kinds of warnings
to save me from ruin

Last edited by ZanneMarie on 12 May 2007, 9:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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