Anyone here over 40 and single?

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Just wondering if I'm the only one...

No I just celebrated by 53 birthday and I am single. Never was much interested in marriage. When I hear my sisters talk about their husbands, I sometimes wonder why they are not divorced (I know, that is mean of me)

I imagine there are a lot of people on WP who are over 40 and single. I was single until I was 48. Now I'm 58 and in a rather odd kind of aspie-adjusted long-term relationship with an NT, but before that I was single for decades and decades, which was sad.

yeah

I'm over forty, but I am engaged. I didn't get engaged until last year, to another Aspie! Before that I was single for many years...

Welcome to the Singlehood! I'm in my early 50s, never married, never any other romantic relationships, and that's always been fine with me. I don't want to have to deal with other people's issues and problems, and I am not about to deal with their unachievable expectations of me. I don't need the extra stress. My life is stressful enough. I do what I can to minimize it. A romantic relationship would just cause more stress than it's worth to me. Besides, I am an introverted hermit. Hermits don't do romantic relationships.

Are you kidding????? Lots here.

I'm 50 and never a LTR. It sucks, but I'm dealing as best I can.

41 years old here, never married and one non-romantic relationship 12 years ago.

Over 40, never in a relationship

You're not alone in that. I am too.
I'm kind of tired of being a hermit- type. I've gotten too good at it.

I've had 2 short terms, want to marry but would probable settle with a LTR. I'm torn between the idea of the chances of finding anyone that shares my interests and quirks is far beyond Pluto, and would I be able to handle having another 'me' in my life?

I'm 44, divorced for five plus years.

me too

Er, to expand on my previous, brief comment a bit...
Single and never had any relationships and I suspect that that will stay that way. I think my development is too stunted & messed up at this point to be able to manage such a thing, anyway.

It might be possible with some really weird person, but I suspect that such a person would have too many unrealistic and internally inconsistent qualities to actually exist.

But I've had lifelong depression that has been somewhat successfully treated in recent years, and half the time when I wake up I'm glad just to be alive and not feeling like sh**, and so i'm not as worried about the above stuff.

I'm in my 50s and have never had a long term relationship. I get total emotional and sensory overload when I'm close to someone I'm attracted to and just freeze/go mute; the other person assumes my complete unresponsiveness means I'm not interested, of course. I've never had a relationship in the time I've known I have Asperger's, so I couldn't even explain to them why it happens.

All this means I've never managed to negotiate a relationship past the first few weeks/days. I've only ever met about half a dozen people I find attractive anyway, so it's not something that's come up often. I only want a relationship when there's someone in my life I find attractive – I never even think about the issue if there isn't. There hasn't been anyone for the past 15 years or so, so I've had no interest in that time.

I could never live with anyone anyway, so I don't see myself ever having a conventional relationship. Maybe one day I'll find someone who lives 100 miles away, and just visit occasionally – that would do fine for me! But it really wouldn't bother me if I never had another relationship, I'm perfectly happy on my own.

Hi,

I'm a self diagnosed aspie and high functioning: have a few friends, able to hold down a job. I am 47 and still single. I never had a "real" girlfriend (one involving intimate contact). I was finally able to ask a girl out for lunch a few times last summer. She approached me first and seem interested in me. We both started new jobs at the same compamy and we met at a training class. I still have trouble talkiing with a girl I'm interested in that I don't know. The nice ones are always married.

Unfortunately, it didn't work out due we have nothing in common. She was very athletic and was shocked that I didn't know how to skate.

I love alternative and folk music. I asked her who her favorite bands were and she replied "Fleetwood Mack" and "Jefferson Startship". I then asked her who her favorite artist was that still is recording. I brought up the group Coldplay but she never heard of them. Nothing wrong with that but I feel you need someone in common.

I feel better off single without the trouble of marriage or relationship. My sister told me that.

I know it's hard but try not to feel bad. You are not the only one.