MrsPeel wrote:
Well, I've just been filling out a divorce application.
I got to 20 years of marriage (total 25 years together), believe it or not, before it all fell apart.
Anyhow, this got me thinking, I've heard terrible statistics about about Aspergers and marriage failures (if we ever get married at all). So this is a poll about marriage and relationships, to get some stats on this from my fellow WPeers.
This is mainly intended for those over about 30 years, who might have a good idea by now whether or not they're likely to enter a long-term relationship. I'm not differentiating between marriage and de-facto relationships, or between hetero and same sex, they all count.
Would love to hear your thoughts on this, and your reasons for voting as you do.
Still married after two decades here. I don't know about statistics. I always tended to find one person and wanted to develop a best friend, and/or life partner. That was my pattern from the beginning, but I had to sort through a lot of people, i.e. failed friendships and failed relationships, to find at last, someone that got along with me O.K., I mean just O.K. When I was young person, I was very immature and did not know what I wanted. I wasted a lot of time. As I got older, I learned what I wanted and was able to narrow my scope.
Mainly I think my husband and I get along because we respect each others spaces and differences, are polite, and are willing to compromise. Half of marriage is just being courteous and considerate, I had to work on that a lot in the beginning and modify my own behavior. He is tons better at social skills than I am, although I'm better off now than as a young person. If I could give one bit of advice, I would just say find someone with some manners. If you lack some manners, their manners might rub off on you. My husband was a good influence on me in the long run. Also, he was pretty geeky and expert in a few skills, just like me, just different skills than mine. I respect people that know something I don't know, it does not put me off or cause me envy or insecurity.