Is 38/39 a little soon for me to have a midlife crisis?

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catpiecakebutter
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14 Feb 2023, 1:21 am

I'm turning 39 in a month and I feel kinda like I'm having a early mid life crisis. I don't have job, and I never graduated high school properly, or went to college or university. I'm sick of my period and pms that happens each month and I get into angry meltdowns sometimes when it happens. I do volunteer work and I've tried looking for a job with no success. I know I will never want to be in a relationship as I have been single for many years since my early 20's and I have only a few friends I see in person but not too many. Is 38/39 a little soon for me to have a midlife crisis in anyone's opinion? I don't have any grey hairs yet but I feel middle aged at times especially since I'm turning 40 in March of 2024.



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14 Feb 2023, 2:05 am

I had a "mid-life crisis" at the age of 32.  I'm more than twice that age now, and I feel pretty good.


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14 Feb 2023, 2:34 am

Depends how long you plan to live.

I'm having my end of life crisis. :lol:



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14 Feb 2023, 3:47 pm

I think I had something similar 13 years ago (age 32). Suddenly I thought I should have a relationship again, so I got the idea that it could be a midlife crisis. While in the past 20 years I wasn't interested in having a relationship at all. And it didn't take long until I figured out it would be stupid idea, because it would end in a mess again.

At that time I also was suddenly dissatisfied with my life, while previously I've been indifferent. Then I figured out I may have a personality disorder. A year later I went to the psychiatrist for the first time (though I basically didn't talk to him). Another few years later I was diagnosed with Asperger syndrome, after talking to another psychiatrist.

I think you shouldn't be negative about your past life. Instead, try to improve your current life in little steps. Find things which improve your life quality. Maybe find some interesting new special interests to fill your life with.



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14 Feb 2023, 8:06 pm

I do a have new goal of losing weight who is sort of a new interest but my self esteem is so bad I don't like it when people compliment me and I had bad self esteem for at least 20 years since I was teenager.



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14 Feb 2023, 9:28 pm

With the stress of being autistic in a neurotypical world, and how often autistics are un or underemployed it is not surprising a period of profound disappointment and questioning of one's life would occur earlier than typical.


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15 Feb 2023, 2:44 am

ASPartOfMe wrote:
With the stress of being autistic in a neurotypical world, and how often autistics are un or underemployed it is not surprising a period of profound disappointment and questioning of one's life would occur earlier than typical.

Agreed



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15 Feb 2023, 3:11 am

you're turning 39 and you have no grey hairs?

I am 33 and have noticed a grey hair here and there in my hair, so idk if you are 39 and haven't gotten them yet your hair is probably doing better than mine.


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15 Feb 2023, 10:33 pm

No, although there's also the so-called quarter life crisis - although that's typically following college.


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15 Feb 2023, 10:36 pm

The quarter life crisis?
Is OP going to live to be 156?

39 is half-life if you live to be 78, so I think it's appropriate.


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15 Feb 2023, 10:39 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
The quarter life crisis?
Is OP going to live to be 156?

39 is half-life if you live to be 78, so I think it's appropriate.


They're not very literal, mid-life crises often happen well after mid-life. It's more the cause of the disillusionment. Did you waste your life and fail to achieve what you wanted, or have you just realized you're about to?


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15 Feb 2023, 10:41 pm

You're right. It doesn't have to be around age 40, but I think that's when it usually hits.
Most people have settled into the "OMG I'm not 20 anymore" mindset by then, plus ennui.


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15 Feb 2023, 10:43 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
You're right. It doesn't have to be around age 40, but I think that's when it usually hits.
Most people have settled into the "OMG I'm not 20 anymore" mindset by then, plus ennui.


I've usually associated them with empty-nesters, but I guess there's the ones that develop before then too.

Not to mention the folks who haven't had kids but still experience them.


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15 Feb 2023, 10:51 pm

lol I'd love to be an empty-nester.


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15 Feb 2023, 10:57 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
lol I'd love to be an empty-nester.


My folks too. :oops:


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15 Feb 2023, 10:59 pm

I'm single and it would still be nice.


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