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Pepperfire
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30 Mar 2008, 4:56 pm

LeKiwi wrote:
Pepperfire, I think I'm kinda going through something similar at the moment. I'm 21, and finally sort of coming to terms with my AS. But the more I come to terms with it, the more memories come back and the more anachronisms I thought I'd buried seem to pop up - or maybe I just recognise them as what they are, I don't know - and the more obvious it seems to become. Maybe through acceptance I'm just not suppressing things through denial so much; it's hard to tell. But I do wonder if there's anything really that could help. Maybe even just talking about it with people (in real life, not just on here, though this does help) would give me some kind of validation that this IS who I am, and at last I can be proud of it and not so scared and ashamed, and that it isn't necessarily a bad thing or anything, and I can deal with it... etc.

Does that make sense?

I really think just talking, or explaining my experiences so as to possibly help other 4 or 14 year olds going through this, may help.

As background, I was diagnosed unofficially at 14 - my parents work with autistics/AS all day, and it was them who first recognised it in me, when they first got into the field. Suddenly all my frustrations and 'weird' behaviours made sense, and they were going to seminar after seminar finally figuring out their strange little daughter at last. They conferred with our doctor, who agreed with them, and eventually told me some time later. I guess I went into a kind of denial at that point, and it's only been in the last year that I've started to accept it as a part of me without shame.

Love is a funny thing - like you, I met a couple of years ago a man who has made me realise that all the love poems and stories and whatnot can be real and true and you can have that deep, incredible, spritual kind of connection with someone. And when I told him and he didn't flip, he just smiled and gave me a hug and talked about it, and wanted to know more - "I don't think you're a fruitcake or Rain Man, but I want to learn more about it so I can understand you better and help you, because clearly it's something that affects you deeply and if I can help you deal with it better than I should know how" were his words. Him being the first person to know beyond my family, and to just accept it so happily and openly, has also made me accept it in myself too and perhaps seek that validation about it. But then I have to remember not all 'normals' are as accepting or as kind and open as he is, and that I can't really go shouting it from the rooftops and telling everyone I meet, because we all know about prejudice and the misunderstandings that come from 'suffering' a 'disorder' (which I neither do nor have, in my opinion).

And that's sort of why now I'm thinking about perhaps finding out about treatment, or talking to someone about it, or getting help. I don't know if an official 'paper' diagnosis would be required for that and to access those sorts of support programmes, and if so that's just something I may have to explore as part of this process, but yeah..




Don't quite know what the point of this post is, other than to say I may be half your age but I think I'm going through something quite similar at the moment and know where you're coming from, and it's one of the reasons I love these boards so much... that ability to talk to people who understand where you're coming from and have those shared experiences with this thing.

Do let us know how you get on and keep us updated; it's never an easy process but it's always an interesting one I suppose! Good luck. :)


Thanks LeKiwi. I will.



Pepperfire
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Joined: 10 Feb 2008
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31 Mar 2008, 1:34 pm

Prof_Pretorius wrote:
Treatments ???

I take a daily dose of Irish Whiskey, does that count???


I prefer dark rum. But, alas, I was referring to treatments of the more "medical" kind. :)



LeKiwi
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01 Apr 2008, 12:50 pm

Does Bailey's count as Irish Whiskey...?? If so, count me in! ;)


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