Crystal1414 wrote:
I use drugs recreationally.But weed is my favorite and it helps me sometimes. My family is ok with me smoking it because it helps me sleep. However other people in my life tell me to not smoke it because of my mental illness and Autism. They think I'm not mature enough.
Then there are people who dont think I should drink. I like getting drunk sometimes. It's fun. However some people think I am like a child, I guess. They dont seem to understand Autism very well. They think I'm more like a 12 year old than a 20 year old. I dont believe in the mental age stuff. I'm an adult and I can make my own decisions.
I look up harm reduction every time I try a drug. I only didn't look it up once. People seem to think I'm reckless or stupid.
People in my family such as my cousins don't like sharing weed with me because they are scared it will send me into psychosis or that I'm not mature enough. I have a higher tolerance for it than them. I enjoy getting super high. My psychiatrist says I should cut down though because of paranoid thoughts and religious delusions. Weed helps me feel more connected to my spiritual side though and it takes my paranoia away.
I do get psychosis when I drink sometimes though. The last time that happened was because I drank a few glasses of vodka mixed with Iced tea. I got wasted and started talking about Jesus and Satan to my 16 year old cousin. Hes a bit scared of me now and has been distant since. He encouraged me to drink more though. I was having a weird night.
Then there are the people who tell me to quit vaping. That would be hard for me because it helps me a lot. It helps with the anxiety I experience daily. It also helps with racing thoughts. I know I will quit eventually though. My grandparents help me out with my vape needs. I struggle with communication and sometimes I need assistance with ordering.
Anyways, I'm just sick and tired of people who tell me that I shouldnt do things just because I'm Autistic and have Schizophrenia
Even if you have autism and schizophrenia you are still an adult and should be able to do adult things. Nothing wrong with smoking weed or drinking, it is good to recognize how it effects you though and try and use some moderation. But yeah not sure if your psychiatrist just has the old-school view that weed causes/worsens schizophrenia or if he has specifically observed it making things like that worse for you specifically. I just figure may be worth considering their advice even if you don't choose to follow it. Idk I feel weed helps me a lot, but for sure I have certainly gotten too high on it before or sometimes I feel I want to be more sober than high. So like maybe I will smoke a smaller amount or split an edible in half to get the calming effects but not so much the high, just enough to help my anxiety and things like that.
But also if you drink hard liquor you'll get drunk more quickly so may be a good idea to sort of limit the amount of that. Just because also drinking hard liquor can also lead to an overdose more easily than like just having a few beers so just good to be aware of that and try not to go past your limit. An alcohol overdose can be deadly wheras if you get too high on weed it might be unpleasant but you can't die from it. So though it is a good idea not to smoke too much weed at least that isn't as risky as if you drink way too much alcohol.
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We won't go back.
18 Oct 2021, 8:39 pm
