Paranoia is honestly getting out of control

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I haven't left the house in 2 days. I'm in constant fear. I feel like I'm being followed, watched, judged, talked about when I go out. I know on a level it's not real but they're persistent.


Also sometimes my surroundings change but subtle and it makes me feel afraid. Then other people are just acting normally but I'm afraid. I try to remind myself that I'm in the same place as other people but I can't seem to understand it. It looks the same but feels different for me.


Sometimes I think I get a different version of books because I don't fit in and it's a trick. Then I read someone else's copy of the book and it's the same as mine. Yet it still doesnt soothe me.


I'm just a little bit embarrassed, scared, and frustrated. People just try to comfort me. It's not helpful because I don't just have an off switch. I'm aware but I'm not. that's what doesn't make sense to. Then there's the what if's. What if that stuff is real and I'm making up that I'm paranoid just to feel safe. Maybe I really am out of place. I even feel that way around people I could relate to.

*hug*

Have you been taking your meds recently?

Thanks. I just realized I've been forgetting. I think that's why my psychiatrist dropped me. I'm terrible at sticking to them. it's a weird cycle. Like I take them and then I stop and the longer I stop, the more I don't want to. Honestly I'm stressed out now because other things I just realized. Oof. I keep having "epiphanies" and writing them down.

You should take them again, the paranoia will probably subside.

Yeah, medications that can treat paranoia symptoms such as those seen on the schizo' spectrum are usually rather effective.

Do you have one of those pill organizers for each day of the week? Maybe you need someone to remind you and supervise you whilst you take the meds to make sure that you do?

From personal experience, the medications can help, but having a competent psychiatrist and therapist is more important.

For me personally, it turned out to be very different from what they thought and doing a lot of work focused on evaluating what was going on in my perception of reality things did get better. But, there was also years of taking medication for it.

I'd definitely use a planner and alarms to help remember. Those weekly organizers are what I used to use.