Is there any other non-binary people here?

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Edna3362
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15 Jul 2017, 9:02 am

I might be... I thought about this even as a child.

I don't fit in with girls, I don't fit with boys either.
Until now, I don't fit in with women, I don't fit in with men either. :| In or out of the spectrum.
I couldn't picture myself as trans either. It doesn't 'ring'.


I'm not particularly feminine nor masculine. I don't even know. :lol: I might as well be just some preadolecent child in an adult's body, or just apathethic about things like this.

All I know is that I'm biologically female, and I don't mind being referred as 'she', I don't mind if people calls me a girl, a lady, or a woman. I won't insist anyone otherwise -- it's no one's business.
And, I don't need to change. If I were born male, I wouldn't mind either. :twisted:


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hundertsieben
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12 Sep 2017, 10:22 am

I'm non-binary! Not so sure if I'm trans male sometimes, but I most of the time I think it's non-binary.
I hated to choose a gender when registering on this page, is there anything I can do about it?



floodwater
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15 Sep 2017, 10:13 pm

i was born with a hormonal condition (i'm intersex) .... never really wanted to play the pink or blue game. now i consider myself nonbinary and go by they/them pronouns and it's the most comfortable i've ever been.

there are as many intersex people as there are redheads. the "sex and gender are the same" mindset is so silly..... why not just let people do whatever they want with their gender? why are transgender and nonbinary people hurting you enough that you have to attack and alienate them?


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JudeFarmer
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16 Oct 2017, 11:23 pm

yes there are non-binary people here. no doubt more than will post to this thread.
I am not a binary person.
and I'm glad to know I'm not alone here. thank you OP :)



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18 Oct 2017, 9:26 am

Hello from another enby! :D


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Tripodologia
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13 Nov 2017, 2:04 pm

NB here as well! I identify as gender-neutral / agender.


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AspieAlphys28
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05 Dec 2017, 11:12 am

Hi! I'm nonbinary :) I'm not "out" to most people in real life mostly because I'm afraid of being called a special snowflake or a faker or something. It's a bummer not having your identity recognized, but there are supportive people in the world.

I don't see why people make such a fuss over being nonbinary, all it means is you're not a boy and you're not a girl. Gender is a construct of society anyways, in nature there's no certain colors or clothing that male/female animals are assigned to, it's all something humans made up.


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Haiku
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07 Dec 2017, 5:48 pm

I'm transmasculine agender/neutrois. Luckily, I live in California, where nonbinary gender is now legally recognized.



green0star
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14 Dec 2017, 8:08 am

Haiku wrote:
I'm transmasculine agender/neutrois. Luckily, I live in California, where nonbinary gender is now legally recognized.


NY acknowledges agender, genderqueer, and non binary as well but mostly if you fill out papers at the urgent care places (;



pandoradawn
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29 Dec 2017, 11:15 pm

I'm non binary. I tend to lean towards the femme side of the spectrum, socially, and for the longest time I thought I was a transwoman because I have suffered from body dysphoria but the more I think about my own gender the less I feel like gender is actually a real tangible thing and the more I feel like it's social construct that was invented by humans. I tend to identify as agender these days. My pronouns are They or She.



Nonsense
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13 Jan 2018, 3:35 pm

I used to think, first maybe I am trans woman, then maybe I am non-binary, and now I think nilistically that there's not really gendered self. It's just a made-up human game where you won't ever be happy so I just reject all gendered meanings and if people want to gender me, I act like it doesn't make sense at all because it really doesn't. So, in this world, sometimes I don't "am" non-binary but I am being made this or that gender, sometimes non-binary too. I have even gone through some physical transition not-mere-aging but it's not like it has made me become anything but instead made my existence easier to cope with.



Onyxaxe
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14 Mar 2018, 9:44 pm

Androgynous female. I've never cared enough to identify as anything else. I come from a science based view on genders and sexes in that everyone is a mixture of both (on a hormonal level that determines the physical state) . Gender norms are societal and I don't care to conform to those, therefore I need no label, even a label that isn't a label. I understand body dysphoria amongst some in the Trans community (or at least I'm trying to) and I could see how the label would help in that regard. I'm trying to understand how someone could place such a matter of importance on their gender (physical, mental etc) and that's where I get stuck in trying to understand the Non-Binary label. Is it ingrained, physiological, societal? Or is it just something that's always been there?

It seems silly for anyone on the spectrum to condemn or poke fun of someone for not being able to "pick a gender". Isn't that why we're all here? Because we're autistic, meaning we can't just force ourselves into the mold? How is Non-Binary so different?

There really don't seem to be a lot of Non-Binary people around even though like someone else mentioned there used to be more. It seemed to be something common to those on the spectrum. Good luck finding some more to talk to :D . I made a non binary friend in person and am working on the gender neutral pronouns myself. Any advice is helpful.

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15 Mar 2018, 6:59 pm

@Nonsense: I also think it(gender) is essentially a made up game. If every male in a society were expected to wear skirts and women were expected to wear pants that would be the norm, and if a man in that society wore pants people would probably have some epithet for it that amounts to "fairy" or "queer" in our society and women in skirts would be similarly ridiculed.

@Onyxaxe: I have essentially given up on labels as well, particularly since labeling myself in conversation still requires an explanation to ensure that the other person hears MY meaning, and not some other meaning for the label I am using, and then they will make assumptions based on my self-label that may distract them from seeing who I really am.... but of course all words are labels of a sort, and it has been very difficult to express that I am actually not queer, non-gendered, traditionally male(I use the terms male and man and he), trans, non-binary or anything like that. I was born a male sexed child. I rejected traditional american male gender roles almost instinctively from the time I was very young on the basis that they seems limiting and no one could explain 'why' men and women have assigned behavior roles adequately. Now I see myself as a man(because I am) but any roles attached to that have been examined and chosen over time based on who I choose to be, rather than out of fear of breaking the mold. Women's clothing seems(on the whole) impractical and fragile and I can barely wash men's clothes without shrinking something... so I wear men's clothing because I prefer it in every way, and I put flowers in my hair when I feel so inclined, and cluck and fuss like a mother when the children in my life act out, or get scraped up. It's difficult to explain to the average american that I fill the male gender role in appearance because I happen to have chosen the clothes I like and the appearance I like and that happens to appear traditionally male, and many people don't know that is very different from wearing men's clothing without ever questioning it.

lol Such a simple thing to make such a fuss about. One thing I do not understand, and am not denouncing either, is surgery to match appearance to gender(or elective cosmetic surgery in general). I have never wanted another body, and even when I feel out of place I have a sense that this body was formed all around me to meet the needs of my spirit. I have never wanted to change it that I can recall, so I do struggle to grasp that desire to transform dramatically and physically. I've settled for just not judging what I do not understand. Also, I have tattoos, and that is a very permanent surgical cosmetic procedure, so maybe I can understand a bit....


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Onyxaxe
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23 Mar 2018, 1:16 pm

shadowself wrote:
@Nonsense: I also think it(gender) is essentially a made up game. If every male in a society were expected to wear skirts and women were expected to wear pants that would be the norm, and if a man in that society wore pants people would probably have some epithet for it that amounts to "fairy" or "queer" in our society and women in skirts would be similarly ridiculed.

@Onyxaxe: I have essentially given up on labels as well, particularly since labeling myself in conversation still requires an explanation to ensure that the other person hears MY meaning, and not some other meaning for the label I am using, and then they will make assumptions based on my self-label that may distract them from seeing who I really am.... but of course all words are labels of a sort, and it has been very difficult to express that I am actually not queer, non-gendered, traditionally male(I use the terms male and man and he), trans, non-binary or anything like that. I was born a male sexed child. I rejected traditional american male gender roles almost instinctively from the time I was very young on the basis that they seems limiting and no one could explain 'why' men and women have assigned behavior roles adequately. Now I see myself as a man(because I am) but any roles attached to that have been examined and chosen over time based on who I choose to be, rather than out of fear of breaking the mold. Women's clothing seems(on the whole) impractical and fragile and I can barely wash men's clothes without shrinking something... so I wear men's clothing because I prefer it in every way, and I put flowers in my hair when I feel so inclined, and cluck and fuss like a mother when the children in my life act out, or get scraped up. It's difficult to explain to the average american that I fill the male gender role in appearance because I happen to have chosen the clothes I like and the appearance I like and that happens to appear traditionally male, and many people don't know that is very different from wearing men's clothing without ever questioning it.

lol Such a simple thing to make such a fuss about. One thing I do not understand, and am not denouncing either, is surgery to match appearance to gender(or elective cosmetic surgery in general). I have never wanted another body, and even when I feel out of place I have a sense that this body was formed all around me to meet the needs of my spirit. I have never wanted to change it that I can recall, so I do struggle to grasp that desire to transform dramatically and physically. I've settled for just not judging what I do not understand. Also, I have tattoos, and that is a very permanent surgical cosmetic procedure, so maybe I can understand a bit....


That last part I totally agree with. It's truly different for everyone though and I've come to realize that I can't understand trans logic because I am not trans, just queer. To each their own and more power to everyone just trying to be happy without hurting anybody else. It is odd how society imposes such strict gender based ideals. Like you I was born to my obvious gender and dress that way because the clothes fit well. Tight T shirts and jeans. No need for dresses even though the tees and jeans are quite feminine looking, my butch ass in them is not lol. JK. Clothes are tools. Hair is just something that grows out of your head but we have these ideals ingrained into all of it. It's weird in this day and age from any origins to follow these ideals.



Goldilocks
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23 Mar 2018, 2:14 pm

Love this thread

I've spoken about this before amongst NTs and was ridiculed for weeks. Sometimes when I dress up 'too femme' I feel like I'm in drag or a caricature of what a woman is meant to be like.

I do feel like Im intersex. Like the native American spiritual belief of being Two-Spirit or something similar.


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