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Adam917
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29 Jun 2011, 10:38 pm

Anyone ever heard of this term when referring to people who are one type of orientation but are really infatuated with another group? I'm a mostly straight guy that's perhaps a bit too interested in lesbiana (or whatever lesbian subculture is called). It's like I really admire lesbians or something - to the point where seeing a lesbian couple enjoying themselves (like when I'm out on the town) makes me happy whereas my depression flares big-time when seeing the more common straight couple my age. Does anyone feel that way? Any straight women feel that way with gay men?



Jory
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29 Jun 2011, 11:05 pm

Straight men who like lesbians? Straight women who like gay men? This is madness! Next you'll be telling me that bananas are yellow.



nick007
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29 Jun 2011, 11:10 pm

I sometimes use the phrase lesbian in a man's body. I'm a guy who does NOT have a masculine personality at all. I'm attracted to women but I do not want to be the man in the relationship. My views about romance & relationships are more like a woman's than a man's. Straight women are NOT attracted to me because thy see me as one of their girl friends instead of boyfriend materiel. I am attracted to lesbians sometimes before I know they are gay but I naturally do not have a chance with em because I'm a guy psychically even thou my personality is NOT a guy. The only people who like me are horny gay guys but the idea of having sex with a guy really freaks me out.


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rabidmonkey4262
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30 Jun 2011, 12:12 am

Jory wrote:
Straight men who like lesbians? Straight women who like gay men? This is madness! Next you'll be telling me that bananas are yellow.

^This

Straight men are turned on by lesbians all the time. This just means you're a normal guy.


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Iloveshoujoai
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30 Jun 2011, 12:17 am

my mother has called me a male lesbian. I am obsessed with lesbian romance novels, and I can relate very well to women in the love stories I have read but when I read from a man's point of view it can actually become difficult to relate to. I do not really act like a girl most of the time or consider myself feminine. I'm not even that aroused by watching lesbians in the act (much prefer straight sex if it's without love.)

Romantic relationships are not something men really focus on a lot in books and movies anyway. I cannot stop thinking about relationships and about falling in love, and since I am also attracted to women I naturally gravitate towards lesbians and their romance novels because the readers are meant to fall in love with the women in those books where as the women in straight romances are created for the sole purpose of everyday women relating to them. It also helps that I like the more tomboyish, assertive, princely types of women.



nick007
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30 Jun 2011, 1:27 am

rabidmonkey4262 wrote:
Jory wrote:
Straight men who like lesbians? Straight women who like gay men? This is madness! Next you'll be telling me that bananas are yellow.

^This

Straight men are turned on by lesbians all the time. This just means you're a normal guy.

It's NOT sexual attraction for me. I feel I relate to lesbians better except for the fact that I'm a guy physically. I feel like I should of been the opposite gender or like I should have the opposite sexual orientation because of my personality


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kittylover
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30 Jun 2011, 11:03 am

I have "male lesbian" feelings so strongly that I'm taking hormones so I can be a woman someday.

I've always been attracted to women, but when they've hit on me, they've always wanted someone who'd be the man in the relationship. I could never fulfill that role, because I don't feel like a man at all. I want to be the woman in the relationship, with my girlfriend holding and protecting me. This never happens because I'm a "guy", so I've never dated anyone.

I guess I'm a lipstick lesbian.



Ysone
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01 Jul 2011, 3:34 pm

I think I am a boy trapped in a lesbian's body sometimes. Sometimes I feel really pressured to be more "feminine" when I talk to other lesbian or read lesbian novels, which i think is funny. Haven't I gone through that when I was a little tomboyish girl in the hetero-dominant society already? Good to know that they are more people like that out there.



ceres
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23 Jul 2011, 3:43 pm

As a lesbian, I refer to guys like you as "lesbros". (Although the word "lesbro" is used in a few different contexts.) I've never actually seen the L Word, but as I understand it there was someone who identified as a male lesbian, played by the dude who was the geeky neighbor boy in My So-Called Life.

I would definitely shy away from the term "guydyke," if I were you.



quietbird
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23 Jul 2011, 11:59 pm

rabidmonkey4262 wrote:
Jory wrote:
Straight men who like lesbians? Straight women who like gay men? This is madness! Next you'll be telling me that bananas are yellow.

^This

Straight men are turned on by lesbians all the time. This just means you're a normal guy.


There is a HUGE difference between the attraction to lesbians that straight men exhibit and what the OP is talking.

With straight men it's, I think because I'm not one of those guys, like a 2 for 1 thing. They just think it's 'hot' and 'sexy' because it's 2 women. Often, they're not even attracted to 2 lesbians but 2 straight ultra-femme airbrushed types pretending to be lesbian.

Anyhow, I can relate to the other sort of attraction. It had nothing at all to do with attraction or sexual feelings towards a lesbian couple or the lesbian culture, just a sincere desire to have been born female and date other women.

I've recently confronted and accepted the fact that I'm actually transgender, and hope to start the process of transitioning to be female (but not quite all the way, I'm genderqueer and want to be seen as androgynous). Although I don't have any plans to date anyone who identifies as lesbian (although I have in the past which did a lot of legitimize to me that my feelings were correct and I wasn't just fetishizing) it's nice to know that I will more easily be able to slip into their ranks when I'm feeling in the mood.

That's just my take, what do I know?



HenryHall
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25 Jul 2011, 9:57 pm

rabidmonkey4262 wrote:
Jory wrote:
Straight men who like lesbians? Straight women who like gay men? This is madness! Next you'll be telling me that bananas are yellow.

^This Straight men are turned on by lesbians all the time. ...

True. Very true.

But there is all the difference in the world between a teenage boy who is filled with lust when he gazes at a shapely bikini clad young woman;
and one who gazes at her with envy.

The bystander might not understand that there is a difference. Unless perhaps there are tears rolling down the cheeks.



IdahoRose
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19 Aug 2011, 1:07 am

I feel like a gay man trapped in a woman's body sometimes. Ever since I was a young teenager, I have been enamored with gay culture and have longed to be a part of it even though I am sure that I'm straight. I am very attracted to super-effeminate guys. I would love more than anything to date one and be the "man" in the relationship. I love slash and yaoi fanart and fanfiction, but I don't like it if the guys aren't feminine enough. Examples of guys/characters I have been very attracted to include Prince Poppycock (contestant on America's Got Talent last year), Johnny Depp's portrayal of Willy Wonka, Count D from the anime/manga Petshop of Horrors, Soji Okita from the anime/manga Peacemaker Kurogane, and Nathan Seymour AKA Fire Emblem from the anime Tiger & Bunny.



BatofZion
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22 Aug 2011, 10:43 pm

I understand where the OP is coming from. On one hand, I do find lesbian sex arousing, though I can feel that way about gay sex as well. I just feel like I relate more to lesbians, not only for their love of women, but for their emotional spectrum. When I do finally have sex, I doubt that I'll be much of a man in the sack; I'll probably be more doting on her needs than my own. I just imagine men typically don't know how their orgasms work, but women may.

Anyway, I'm rambling. My point is that I do write lesbian fiction, and I feel like a man who may be somewhat a woman. It's complicated.



Mxzysptlik
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12 May 2012, 11:06 am

This is exactly how I feel. I don't want to be a woman, I like being a man and I like the way my body feels and looks. But I do feel very feminine at some points. I'm attracted to sensual sex when looking at porn. Actually sensual gay sex really attracts me, and I have always had this thing for chick flicks and love stories. I messed around with both guys and girls and I BY FAR enjoy messing around with women more. I feel like inside I was a straight, masculine woman in a man's body that figured out she actually liked girls and then turned gay.



biostructure
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31 May 2012, 12:42 am

I think I kind of get it. I do feel that lesbian relationships have some advantages over straight ones, in that the roles are more determined by who wants to give or receive touch in what way, and don't carry as many expectations about who is more beautiful, sensual, etc. I'm in many ways very male-typical-minded and also very toppy in that I want to be in control, but at the same time I'm very sensual and not nearly as penetration-focused as many guys are, as well as not being protective at all. I don't really care that I have a penis rather than a vagina--without knowing how both feel I can't say for sure which would be better. I just know my partner should have female parts.

I really think it's a matter of me being very boyish, and it seems that youthful cuteness and butchness go together more often in desirable lesbian women than desirable men. Plus, women seem to have this fear of men that they don't of other women, so the lead-up to the sex is more casual without the sex itself needing to be meaningless (and in fact, there seem to be more gradations of meaning in homosexual relationships, or at least there is more ground to arrive at a mutually agreed upon meaning other than a random f**k or love).

All in all though, while I would like to be treated by many women no differently than they would treat a tomboyish woman, I don't dislike my male anatomy enough to say I AM a lesbian.



oxjox
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04 Jun 2012, 9:34 pm

I first heard about this kind of thing when reading about Eddie Izzard.

I understand the feeling of being envious of lesbians. Sexuality is pretty confusing in general though, to me. Maybe I'm demisexual...?
Changing gender seems like a drastic move - if only there was a way to "try before you buy"?