What Song Are You *Feeling* Right Now?

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I have no idea why I like this song so much. It's so romantic and beautiful!

https://youtu.be/YipXUgLxqgw


Red: Death of Me

[Verse 1]
I should've seen all the signs all around me
But I was comfortable inside these wounds
So go ahead and take another piece of me now
While we all bow down to you

[Chorus]
You tear me down and then you pick me up
You take it all and still it's not enough
You try to tell me you can heal me
But I'm still bleeding and you will be the death of me

[Verse 2]
How can you help my affliction
If you're the sickness and not the cure
Too long I've faked this addiction
Another sacrifice to make us pure

[Chorus]
You tear me down and then you pick me up
You take it all and still it's not enough
You try to tell me you can heal me
But I'm still bleeding and you will be the death of me

[Chorus]
You tear me down and then you pick me up (Oooh, ooooh)
You take it all but still it's not enough
You try to tell me you can heal me (Oooh, ooooh)
But I'm still bleeding and you will be the death of me

[Bridge]
I won't forget, I cannot forget this
I won't forget, I'll never forget this
I won't forget, I cannot forget this
I won't forget, I'll never forget
I won't forget, I cannot forget this
I won't forget, I'll never forget this
I won't forget, I cannot forget this
I won't forget, I'll never forget

I know I can never prove this illusion
You aren't the one that I thought you were
So I learn to embrace this delusion
The line that separates us starts to blur

[Chorus]
You tear me down and then you pick me up
You take it all but still it's not enough
You try to tell me you can heal me
But I'm still bleeding and you will be the death of me

[Outro]
(Oooh, ooooh)
And you will be the death of me
I won't forget, I cannot forget this! (Oooh, ooooh)
And you will be the death of me
(Oooh, ooooh)
(Oooh, ooooh)
(Oooh, ooooh)

You're Somebody Else by Flora Cash.

It reminds me of past instances where I read people wrongly, but then eventually understood that they were taking advantage of me and why. (I also like the music video, as it's a symbolic animation about peeling back the layers of an identity.) When I'm in a reflective mood, then I usually feel this song a lot.

I interpret it like this:
Manipulators are playing a social game. Seeing through their manipulation is metaphorically winning this game--"I held the better cards"--but I feel fortunate to have been able to have seen through manipulation at some points in my life. I feel that this is also reflected in the lyrics, "every stroke of luck."
Since I did eventually realize, and they were winning for a while, they "held the balance of the time/that only blindly I could read you."
Yet, eventually realizing that someone isn't who they seemed still hurts. It's a sort of death, because the person who was thought to be there is gone forever, despite never really being there to begin with. They look like themselves, but they're somebody else.
And I feel like the first and last lines, "I saw the part of you that only when you're older/ You will see too, you will see too" is in reference to how manipulators feel superior and justify deception. One day, when old, then they will have moments alone, where they will reflect on the sum of their lives. I think that ego is harder to maintain in those moments, and that the pain caused to others becomes harder to justify. At that point, then they likely can't be in full denial anymore, and will also see that ugly part--even if they don't want to. They probably won't change, probably will still try denial, but they'll know truth deep down.
So, I'm not going to bold parts of the lyrics, because I have feelings on all the words.

Lyrics:

For several days ths has been stuck in my mind.

https://youtu.be/LPLIyeaWxEE

NF:
Remember This

Yeah, they say when we grow up
You'll understand when you're older
Guess I'm still a kid, I don't know it
If I'll ever let go of this (yeah)
Say goodbye to the old me
We ain't friends anymore, you don't know me (real music)
I know I could die any moment
If I do just remember this
Yeah, handouts create lazy people I'm not impressed with
You want something in life, then why don't you go and get it?
Actions speak louder than words do, it's pretty quiet, isn't it?
Look at the world we live in, defined by comment sections
Surround yourself with people that challenge how you think
Not people that nod their head and act like they agree
Those people will cut you open just to watch you bleed
Always be yourself, not the person that you pretend to be, no!
These people gon' tell you that you will never make it
Then when you do, they gon' say they knew you were goin' places
That's just how it works, next thing you know you'll be overrated
Hearing people say they miss the "old you, " it's crazy, ain't it?
And perfect people don't exist, so don't pretend to be one
I don't need pats on the back from people for my achievements
When I die I wanna know that I lived for a reason
Anyone can take your life, but not what you believe in, no
Yeah, they say when we grow up
You'll understand when you're older
Guess I'm still a kid, I don't know it
If I'll ever let go of this
Say goodbye to the old me
We ain't friends anymore, you don't know me
I know I could die any moment
If I do just remember this
Yeah, don't take opinions from people that won't listen to yours
If money's where you find happiness, you'll always be poor
If you don't like the job you have, then what do you do it for?
The cure to pain isn't something you buy at liquor stores, nah
The real you is not defined by the size of your office
The real you is who you are when ain't nobody watchin'
You spend your whole life worried about what's in your wallet
For what? That money won't show up in your coffin, woo!
Yeah, anger's a liar, he ain't got no respect
I fell in love with my pain and I slept with my regrets
Happiness saw it happen, maybe that's why she up and left
Joy called me a cheater, said she ain't coming back
I've always had a problem with relationships
But that's what happens when you see the world through a broken lens
Mistakes can make you grow, that doesn't mean you're friends
Who you are is up to you, don't leave it up to them, no
Yeah, they say when we grow up
You'll understand when you're older
Guess I'm still a kid, I don't know it
If I'll ever let go of this
Say goodbye to the old me
We ain't friends anymore, you don't know me
I know I could die any moment
If I do just remember this
Yeah, they say you got into music, you signed up to be hated
That's kinda weird cause I don't remember signing my name up
Coming from people that give advice but never take none
I like my privacy, but, lately, I feel it's invaded
I heard that life's too short, don't let it pass you by
We waste a lot of time crying over wasted time
It's not about what people think, it's how you feel inside
My biggest failures in life are knowing I never tried, woo!
I look at the world from a different angle
People change, even Satan used to be an angel
Think twice before you're bitin' on the hand that made you
Don't believe what you believe just 'cause that's how they raised you
Think your own thoughts, don't let them do it for you
Say you want a drink, don't wait for people to pour it on you
Cut out the lies, stay close to the people you know are loyal
Grab your own glass and fill it, don't let your fear destroy you, woo!

"Back to Black," Amy Winehouse

Try by Simple Plan

Police State by Special Duties




We're all living in a Police State
Forget about justice, we're patrolling the night
Driving in the back, the cops didn't say
The guys in the black, you're back in the final...
Police State (x4)

We're lving in a Police State
Out with justice, get out of sight

I don't care what you say
The guys in the black, you're back in the final...
Police State (x4)

YOU'RE living in a Police State
Out with justice, the men of the night
I don't care what you say
The guys in the black, you're back in the final...
Police State (x4)

https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=KGCMI ... ture=share

Time too precious and my patience thin
My mind and my soul is the weapon
And every failure was a lesson
It's time to stop blocking these blessings
See, I just wanna grow into my greatness
I wish I had the time that you takin'
'Cause I got needs
Yeah, I got needs
I want war, but I need peace

When things are going to s**t around me I am usually very content and excited to be a passive participant - it's the only time I feel truly attached. For the short term I love it when things are chaotic, it stimulates my brain.
Don't let the words scare you - I'm nonviolent. I just love Eminem's precision with words!

Police Truck by The Dead Kennedys





Tonight's the night that we got the truck
We're going downtown, gonna beat up drunks
Your turn to drive, I'll bring the beer
It's an easy shift, no one to fear

Let's ride, ride how we ride
Let's ride, low ride

It's roundup time where the good whores meet
We're gonna drag one screaming off the street

Let's ride, ride how we ride

Got a black uniform and a silver badge
Playing cops for real, playing cops for pay

Let's ride, low ride

Pull down your dress, here's a kick in the ass
Let's beat you blue, 'till you s**t your pants
Don't move child, I gotta big black stick
There's six of us babe, so suck on my dick

Ride, ride how we ride
Ride, low ride

The left newspapers might whine a bit
But the guys at the station, they don't give a s**t
Dispatch calls, "Are ya doin' somethin' wicked?"
"No siree, Jack, we're just givin' tickets!"

Let's ride, ride how we ride
Let's ride, ride how we ride
Let's ride, ride how we ride
Let's ride, low ride

I know it's over.