Is getting a girlfriend really this straightforward?

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I remember back in college one of my friends told me how he got his girlfriend "We both met at a party and decided we both fancied each other"


So is getting a girlfriend really that straightforward or am I taking what he said to litteraly?

Yes, it happens. Of course, and I apologize if this comes off harsh, "Your Mileage May Vary" Also, there are many other options to find a person who will take a fancy to you, not just parties. Good luck.

It often happens this way, probably more often than any arranged or "gamed" introduction.  My wife and I started our relationship this way: We met (at church), hit it off, hung out and did things together, and made the relationship work.

The trick is to have MUTUAL attraction, and you cannot force someone to be attracted to you.

You also have to have presence of mind to talk to them (without social anxiety) so that you learn about your mutual attraction. Otherwise, the opportunity will pass you by and it won't happen.

If you both fancy each other, then yes it is that easy.
The harder part is finding that person.
Meeting at a party is pretty difficult for those of us who don't do parties.

Sometimes

But not always

It is much harder to meet people if you live in a middle-of-nowhere small town like I do!

Which is part of the reason I am enrolling in Day Program

I want to meet my soulmate!

You can meet a partner anywhere and this could happen, but the attraction has got to be mutual.

So the question is, is it socially acceptable to meet someone at a party at a later stage in life?

You have to "meet" people at a place like meetup.com with common interests. If there aren't any in your local town, try bigger cities, expand the search criteria and area.

People bring their friends(support) along because they are scared of going alone. Have you tried?

Give it time, as people get to know you they might invite you to dinner parties. That is one of many ways. I have made acquaintances through hiking.

It is that straightforward. Unfortunately, finding someone you click with who feels the same towards you is damn hard to do. Easy, yet ridiculously impossible all at the same time. Isn't life weird?

I lived in a house with 5 flats. I fancied the woman upstairs, and she fancied me. We'd pass in the hallways most days and always say 'hi' to each other. Her electricity kept tripping out, and she'd ask me to flip the switch back on ( she couldn't reach it) , she'd knock on my door and ask to borrow things which I always lent her. She knew I had a PlayStation night on Fridays with two mates and kinda invited herself and didn't leave after my mates left. That was 25 years ago and she still hasn't left

Pretty straightforward, although I was oblivious to all her flirting, she had to spell it out for me in the end

I've often wondered how many girls/women have flirted with me and I missed it, and they thought I was a cold bastard

The only step your friend left out is that one of them probably went up to the other and started talking, but aside from that it is typically that simple.

My long term partner saw me at a bus station and started a conversation with me because he thought I looked interesting, at the end of the bus ride we exchanged numbers because we both enjoyed the conversation. We've been living together for 10 years now

The more people you talk to, the more likely you are to find someone who you like and who likes you back

I first met MR in the waiting room at my osteopath. I'd thrown my back out and could barely move. He was just finished his appointment and was chatting to the receptionist about a place I'd been, while he waited for another doctor. It's not like me to pipe up and speak even with people I do know, because I'm usually mute. On that occasion I felt animated by his presence somehow, and I joined their conversation. He could see I could barely move to walk up to the reception desk so he sat down beside me and we continued the chat. Then I went in for my treatment and I thought that was the end of it. When my treatment ended I had to wait for my daughter to pick me up because my back was so bad I couldn't drive. Alas, he came out from his second appointment and we continued chatting. When my daughter arrived, he gave me his number and said I could text him if I was interested in talking again. I didn't give him mine. It was right before Christmas when we met, so I was busy and It took me about five days to get up the nerve to text him. We had our first date on the 31st December 2019, in the daytime.

I agree that it takes courage to talk to people or make that first move. I assume he "made the first move" because he gave me his number. That takes guts. I had to text HIM though, and that was a hard decision to make. I've never texted or contacted a stranger after meeting like that. You could also say that I made the first move, because I'm the one who joined into his conversation with the receptionist, even though I had no intention at all of trying to flirt or get his number.

With Jerry he reached out to me first rather than the other way around

I don't know if I feel truly comfortable taking the initiative of asking a man to date me because I'm scared of rejection

That might be part of the reason it's been so hard for me to find my soulmate and why it has been taking so long!

That's, like, the very same reason why I'm not feeling comfortable asking a girl out, especially when it comes off as out-of-the-blue.

Forgot to mention my friend and the girl he met at the party are both very high functioning autistics.

Unlike me of course there barely on the radar

Good for them