advice please!

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Hm i have the same problem, only i am the guy with asperger and she's the normal girl who is being hurt by me behaving odd by holding her off.

The main reason i'm doing it is coz i think she deserves better than me. Afterall what future can i offer her since i got no job and have little money? So i really let the relationship die slowly, but she keeps hanging on.

I too don't like making telephone calls and prefer to write messages by sms or email. We used to chat a lot but recently i started sending her offline messages so i got more time to think what i wanna tell her. I told her i don't like her calling me all the time but she does it anyway. Most of the times i don't answer her calls coz i don't like lenghty conversations, especially when she wants to talk about feelings and stuff.

You say you guys live in different countries, i used to think that's the best way for an aspie coz then he don't have to be with his gf all the time. But on the other side it's kinda expensive to keep travelling up and down. We live in different countries as well. I only went to visit my gf one time and never went back.

I know she suffers by all this but i can't change who i am. I'm really surprised a girl like her is willing to love me and all but i'm just not ready for this. It feels bad to break someones heart like this though.

hello there! ill go with letter A. i think having AS got something to do with all his actions. i think his intentions are good and i think he loves you but he is very uncomfortable in doing things that WE (people who doesnt have AS) expect them to do.

i have a bf with AS. but mine is more complicated than yours-since he's divorced and got 2 kids.but all went well for the next couple of months we've been together. he proved to me that he really loved me by overcoming his anxiety going on a trip alone just to visit me and he even managed to introduce me to her mum and kids. until just recently he became very confused with lots of things. he starts ignoring me and wants a time off. i am caught off guard by all these and it made me very hurt by everything. i tried giving up on him but then later on, i realized that i do really love him inspite of what he got.

right now, we're still communicating. i still consider him my bf though he doesnt..i still say that i love him every single chance i have. i register on this site because i want to get some insights about people with AS. i want to understand why he do this and that. and luckily, i am learning...

what i have in mind is this..if the person we love cant come into our world, then we should be the one to come to their world....and thats what im doing..

you can widen your horizons to understand him...

hon wrote:

That is a great quote.

Impressive indeed.

You two are so sweet. It made me smile and cry to read that.

Both a and b. I dont like to talk about myself either or call people by phone. but i see your problem. Try asking him if you could meet hes parents or some of hes friends. and if he would call you some time.
My problem with calling is i dont like to call people in a bad time. but i have learned to overcome some of it (still hate calling people i dont know)