Just broke up with BF

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OK, I did it. I just broke up with BF. I just came to the full realization that the relationship is no good for me. Now, I am freaking out about being in a completely new place with no one to hang out with or nothing to do, after 8 mos of living here. I only moved across the country to be closer to him, after all!

Besides, the music in my head is still driving me crazy. It's gone on 6 days now. Repetitive, loud music over and over, like a record skipping. My psychiatrist told me I need to see my GP to be referred to a neurologist. So, I am seeing her in the morning. Since I have never had this happen before, I started wondering if the stress of this relationship was causing this extreme OCD thing to trigger.

Oh dear, I am very sorry for this whitetiger. ^^ I do hope you shall be happy son however *Blesses*. I believe in the past, when I have become blessed with agitation, magical thoughts enjoy repeating myselves within my head on a particular matter. However, I am very sorry as this has not occurred for me for as long as this time I believe. I am very sorry for being of little help.

It took you long enough!
Ha! This from someone who can take years to finally get around to doing what has been decided.
My husband found that taking ginkgo helped with his tintinnitis. Me, I just ignore the tintinnitis and sometimes don't pick up the phone or notice the instrument pinging because I think it is part of my constant auditory hallucinations. But a song, an ear worm, that is truly annoying.

I just don't have anymore to give. It's sad, really. I wish I could give him another chance, but I just can't. I'm worried about being so alone with him out of my life, though. Still, I feel this is the best thing. What helped is for my psychiatrist to say today that this just isn't a healthy relationship.

Sorry about your situation whitetiger.

Nothing in life is easy especially splitting from someone whom you had feelings and devotions for.

My only concern is that you aren't dependent upon relationships for ultimate happiness. Not accusing of that.....but I see so many people who are content with themselves alone and then I see people who are unhappy with their partners because they're afraid they'll be alone for the rest of their life. Just remember that being single isn't the end of the world and keep an open mind about your future.

Just know that it isn't the end and treat your time as a learning experience rather than an omen. Now is the time that you learn more about yourself for a change.

Thanks MissConstrue,

Because I'm autistic, I tend to enjoy time alone and fill it with hobbies and interests. My problem though is that I don't work, don't have other friends, and spend 24/7 alone. It gets to me. I get crazy and lonely. Add to that the fact that my neuro-system is going nuts now, with obnoxious music playing constantly for days on end in my head.

ihh :/ the music things sounds... icky. you should definitely have that checked, maybe its all the stress
i remember you had troubles w this relationship before

consider it freedom, as best as you can. try to relax? :/
idunno. im wishing for the best :]

Oh no. While I do think you made a wise decision given several of the issues you've talked about in the past, that doesn't mean it's easy to deal with the reality of what has taken place, and the changes it puts in your immediate future. Oh the changes. I can relate to all of it, having separated from my husband in June. There are times when the fear of what now and what if are paralyzing. But the reality for me was that the stress was giving me so many triggers, I had to be heavily medicated just to be in the same room as him. I have found that it took me a full month and a half for it to fully hit me. And now I've got all sorts of crazy emotions coursing through my body. I hate the out of control feeling. It's exhausting.

And the music!! !! I get that too!! ! It consumes me. I've never met anyone else who has had it before.

gyah, the music playback -.- At least mine is pretty good, and mostly only comes from video games where there's no lyrics . It is awfully repetitive most of the time though.

For the two hours I've been awake in the night, the music sounds like Muzak. Over and over, it goes, "duh-duh-duh-duh-duh duh." I'm worried I'm going to end up in a psych ward. I can't tell you how worried I am about this.

I feel like such a fool to be taken in by BF's lies and covering up of his problems. I just can't go on, even though I'd like to. I don't have the energy or any confidence left. I have like no emotions, other than agitation and irritation over the music in my head.

Look Tiger, if the music is such a problem, you need to go out and take a walk, generally without much sounds, like a forest. And breathe in the silence of the moment... Or at the very least listen to some more "natural" noises. (At least that does it for me)

Thanks, but my GP is talking to my psychiatrist now about possible hospitalization for me over this. It's gotten very serious.

“To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be happy, one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness.” - Woody Allen.

I have bad tinnitus, ringing in the ears. It takes different forms. I hear police sirens in the middle of the countryside where there's nobody around. A few days ago I was driving down the freeway and kept hearing a train bell, the ding-ding-ding that an Amtrak train makes when pulling into the station. I have to have a fan on full blast next to me while I sleep to drown it out. I went to a doctor and there was nothing he could do. If you're having auditory hallucinations, then I don't know what to say. If this is like voices inside your head type of thing, then maybe you need medication usually used for schizophrenics.

I hope you can get some relief from this, Whitetiger. Neurological issues are no fun, I know this. When are you going to see the neurologist? Hopefully they would have heard of the phenomenon and know how to treat it. I have read about other people who have had it. it is unusual though... I wonder what causes it. Maybe your mind is very sensitive to sound so you are sort of getting reverberating flashbacks of sound you have already heard? It may not be those exact sounds but the brain weaves it into something different.

on edit just found an article on it.

http://bps-research-digest.blogspot.com ... there.html