06 Mar 2011, 4:09 am
06 Mar 2011, 7:09 am
06 Mar 2011, 8:58 am
06 Mar 2011, 3:21 pm
06 Mar 2011, 3:55 pm
bewarethebob wrote:
Im not sure why you got so angry over this post, or if it was just you standing up to something that doesnt exist. But I am confused by your aggresive reaction. So why get so touchy?
Hi bewarethebob, I don't think Kaybee was being aggressive. I think it's more of a straightforward query. But I'm sure Kaybee can answer for herself. It's just how I read it.
But your original post made me think of this quote from one of the mods here:
"If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you. If you really make them think, they'll hate you" - Don Marquis
But as far as artists and love, I'm still waiting to be Yoko to someone's John.
06 Mar 2011, 4:08 pm
I've been in a relationship with three artists of remarkable and intriquing talent. I didn't find them as opaque and obtuse as yourself Bewarethebob. On the contrary I found them very much open to a level of love and intimacy that I've not found in other people without artistic flair, ability and thought. I think also it was no coincidence that two of those three were also the only two people on the autistic spectrum I have been involved with as well.
Maybe what you have experianced is actually more reflective of the age of people you are dealing with. And if they are "modern" artists then they have zero talent for art to begin with anyway, modern art is glorified con artistry after all 
Moog wrote:
bewarethebob wrote:
People who are like puzzles, which i crack. They dont seem to like it when i solve them, because they feel like they cant hide from me, and are afraid ill see their secrets.
I think people get afraid of me reletivly easily. I dont mean to harm anyone, But i am straightforward with them...
I think people get afraid of me reletivly easily. I dont mean to harm anyone, But i am straightforward with them...
I had this problem too. Thing is, I love to see the real person and not the masks. I find that people are more accepting of being 'cracked' if you are accepting of them, and adopt a benevolent attitude about them.
Having one's inner self showing is a position of vulnerability for most people, you have to be very sensitive about it. You definitely will find people get upset if you use those vulnerabilities against them.
I certainly wish i was not so open with showing my inner self in some respects. As i'm well aware i'm leaving myself open. But on the otherhand that kind of openess and honesty is something that can convey a positive force in other people. On the otherhand I think its also something others can find quite intimidating as they conclude their must be a catch in your motivations for being so upfront and open.
Sometimes, I feel life is too short to wear a mask all the time. I think some people wear a mask so close to their self all the time that it becomes "stuck" to them and it can be quite difficult to seperate what is their fascade and what is their real sense of self. I think its a source of tremendous sickness in modern life
06 Mar 2011, 4:15 pm
Laz wrote:
I've been in a relationship with three artists of remarkable and intriquing talent. I didn't find them as opaque and obtuse as yourself Bewarethebob. On the contrary I found them very much open to a level of love and intimacy that I've not found in other people without artistic flair, ability and thought. I think also it was no coincidence that two of those three were also the only two people on the autistic spectrum I have been involved with as well.
Maybe what you have experianced is actually more reflective of the age of people you are dealing with. And if they are "modern" artists then they have zero talent for art to begin with anyway, modern art is glorified con artistry after all
I had this problem too. Thing is, I love to see the real person and not the masks. I find that people are more accepting of being 'cracked' if you are accepting of them, and adopt a benevolent attitude about them.
Having one's inner self showing is a position of vulnerability for most people, you have to be very sensitive about it. You definitely will find people get upset if you use those vulnerabilities against them.
I certainly wish i was not so open with showing my inner self in some respects. As i'm well aware i'm leaving myself open. But on the otherhand that kind of openess and honesty is something that can convey a positive force in other people. On the otherhand I think its also something others can find quite intimidating as they conclude their must be a catch in your motivations for being so upfront and open.
Sometimes, I feel life is too short to wear a mask all the time. I think some people wear a mask so close to their self all the time that it becomes "stuck" to them and it can be quite difficult to seperate what is their fascade and what is their real sense of self. I think its a source of tremendous sickness in modern life
Maybe what you have experianced is actually more reflective of the age of people you are dealing with. And if they are "modern" artists then they have zero talent for art to begin with anyway, modern art is glorified con artistry after all
Moog wrote:
bewarethebob wrote:
People who are like puzzles, which i crack. They dont seem to like it when i solve them, because they feel like they cant hide from me, and are afraid ill see their secrets.
I think people get afraid of me reletivly easily. I dont mean to harm anyone, But i am straightforward with them...
I think people get afraid of me reletivly easily. I dont mean to harm anyone, But i am straightforward with them...
I had this problem too. Thing is, I love to see the real person and not the masks. I find that people are more accepting of being 'cracked' if you are accepting of them, and adopt a benevolent attitude about them.
Having one's inner self showing is a position of vulnerability for most people, you have to be very sensitive about it. You definitely will find people get upset if you use those vulnerabilities against them.
I certainly wish i was not so open with showing my inner self in some respects. As i'm well aware i'm leaving myself open. But on the otherhand that kind of openess and honesty is something that can convey a positive force in other people. On the otherhand I think its also something others can find quite intimidating as they conclude their must be a catch in your motivations for being so upfront and open.
Sometimes, I feel life is too short to wear a mask all the time. I think some people wear a mask so close to their self all the time that it becomes "stuck" to them and it can be quite difficult to seperate what is their fascade and what is their real sense of self. I think its a source of tremendous sickness in modern life
@laz oh no, im not saying its a bad thing. Quite the opposite. I havent had a girlfriend who wasnt an artist.
See, but from what ive made out of it, a lot of artists are so open, its almost a bad thing for a monogamous relationship. I actually like a lot of artists, I just have taken notice of that small detail.
You have a talent for words Laz, intimidate is exactly what i do. the real question is, how do I not intimidate them?
@esther, that quote is perfect for this convo.
im sure youll find a guy , perhaps i misinterpret but that list seemed unnessicary
06 Mar 2011, 4:16 pm
06 Mar 2011, 4:32 pm
06 Mar 2011, 5:40 pm
Moog wrote:
bewarethebob wrote:
People who are like puzzles, which i crack. They dont seem to like it when i solve them, because they feel like they cant hide from me, and are afraid ill see their secrets.
I think people get afraid of me reletivly easily. I dont mean to harm anyone, But i am straightforward with them...
I think people get afraid of me reletivly easily. I dont mean to harm anyone, But i am straightforward with them...
I had this problem too. Thing is, I love to see the real person and not the masks. I find that people are more accepting of being 'cracked' if you are accepting of them, and adopt a benevolent attitude about them.
Having one's inner self showing is a position of vulnerability for most people, you have to be very sensitive about it. You definitely will find people get upset if you use those vulnerabilities against them.
I also have to comment too though, that if one believes they've gotten inside someones mind and can understand them and is wrong... that can be very damaging for the reputation.
I knew someone who was really good psychologist material, and he believed he was reading my mind (a NT reading an autie's mind
). It really aggravate me when he'd use false accusations as if he knew my mind in arguments. It was to the point where he seemed rather stuck on himself in my eyes. And it didn't matter with me saying what I really thought... because he truly thought he was right.
I would think the best thing to do, is even if you're good at it, don't use it as leverage to intimidate or upset somebody. The only way I can even see the trait as being pleasant would be if the person was good at it for one
... and two used it in a friendly manner among friends or family. I could see it as being an awesome trait in a partner as long as she didn't use it against me 
06 Mar 2011, 6:16 pm
bewarethebob wrote:
Kaybee wrote:
1. This really has nothing to do with either artists or love.
2. You don't explain at all how artists allegedly have a warped view of love.
3.
I agree very much. And not only this, I find people are much more accepting of their own flaws and vulnerabilities which lie beneath the cracks if you have a benevolent attitude toward them. I hope this can allow them to also more accepting of ours in return, but I can't speak for the truth of that part.
2. You don't explain at all how artists allegedly have a warped view of love.
3.
Moog wrote:
Thing is, I love to see the real person and not the masks. I find that people are more accepting of being 'cracked' if you are accepting of them, and adopt a benevolent attitude about them.
Having one's inner self showing is a position of vulnerability for most people, you have to be very sensitive about it. You definitely will find people get upset if you use those vulnerabilities against them.
Having one's inner self showing is a position of vulnerability for most people, you have to be very sensitive about it. You definitely will find people get upset if you use those vulnerabilities against them.
I agree very much. And not only this, I find people are much more accepting of their own flaws and vulnerabilities which lie beneath the cracks if you have a benevolent attitude toward them. I hope this can allow them to also more accepting of ours in return, but I can't speak for the truth of that part.
I dont need to explain. Like i said, this doesnt apply to everyone, but as a sweeping generalization, it is harder to initiate relationships with an artist. This just comes from personal experience. so both 1 and 2 of your complaints are invalid.
. Also even in your newer description... just because you go to a school for art with these artists you describe... that doesn't talk for any majority of artists really. That's about as accurate as if I wen't to Japan and did a poll on how many people were christians there and then used that data as a world wide statistic. You are partially correct... that is a mass generalization.bewarethebob wrote:
Im not sure why you got so angry over this post, or if it was just you standing up to something that doesnt exist. But I am confused by your aggresive reaction.
I have to say that I'm confused on how you found Kaybee's post even remotely aggressive . She was just stating that the point of this thread was never explained in the initial post. So with a thread name of "Artists and Love" and then skipping that topic entirely to talk about mind reading actually does mean you should have explained it.
06 Mar 2011, 7:20 pm
bewarethebob wrote:
Kaybee wrote:
1. This really has nothing to do with either artists or love.
2. You don't explain at all how artists allegedly have a warped view of love.
3.
I agree very much. And not only this, I find people are much more accepting of their own flaws and vulnerabilities which lie beneath the cracks if you have a benevolent attitude toward them. I hope this can allow them to also more accepting of ours in return, but I can't speak for the truth of that part.
2. You don't explain at all how artists allegedly have a warped view of love.
3.
Moog wrote:
Thing is, I love to see the real person and not the masks. I find that people are more accepting of being 'cracked' if you are accepting of them, and adopt a benevolent attitude about them.
Having one's inner self showing is a position of vulnerability for most people, you have to be very sensitive about it. You definitely will find people get upset if you use those vulnerabilities against them.
Having one's inner self showing is a position of vulnerability for most people, you have to be very sensitive about it. You definitely will find people get upset if you use those vulnerabilities against them.
I agree very much. And not only this, I find people are much more accepting of their own flaws and vulnerabilities which lie beneath the cracks if you have a benevolent attitude toward them. I hope this can allow them to also more accepting of ours in return, but I can't speak for the truth of that part.
I dont need to explain. Like i said, this doesnt apply to everyone, but as a sweeping generalization, it is harder to initiate relationships with an artist. This just comes from personal experience. so both 1 and 2 of your complaints are invalid.
Im not sure why you got so angry over this post, or if it was just you standing up to something that doesnt exist. But I am confused by your aggresive reaction.
Moog has valid points, and I dont disagree. So why get so touchy?
I was neither angry, aggressive, nor touchy, merely pointing out the flaws of your post. My points aren't invalid and your saying such and inability/refusal to back your claim up with facts (or even personal anecdotes) is unwarrantedly disrespectful and either illogical or lazy. And what is the purpose of posting a thread when you're not open to discussing what you've written? I suppose you can accurately consider this post mildly aggressive, though, and for exactly the reasons Lace-Bane was talking about: You misread me and proceeded to sling a false accusation, and people don't like when that happens.
Lace-Bane wrote:
I have to say that I'm confused on how you found Kaybee's post even remotely aggressive . She was just stating that the point of this thread was never explained in the initial post. So with a thread name of "Artists and Love" and then skipping that topic entirely to talk about mind reading actually does mean you should have explained it.
. She was just stating that the point of this thread was never explained in the initial post. So with a thread name of "Artists and Love" and then skipping that topic entirely to talk about mind reading actually does mean you should have explained it.Yes, thank you, Lace-Bane. That is entirely correct.
06 Mar 2011, 7:51 pm
06 Mar 2011, 10:02 pm
Kaybee wrote:
bewarethebob wrote:
Kaybee wrote:
1. This really has nothing to do with either artists or love.
2. You don't explain at all how artists allegedly have a warped view of love.
3.
I agree very much. And not only this, I find people are much more accepting of their own flaws and vulnerabilities which lie beneath the cracks if you have a benevolent attitude toward them. I hope this can allow them to also more accepting of ours in return, but I can't speak for the truth of that part.
2. You don't explain at all how artists allegedly have a warped view of love.
3.
Moog wrote:
Thing is, I love to see the real person and not the masks. I find that people are more accepting of being 'cracked' if you are accepting of them, and adopt a benevolent attitude about them.
Having one's inner self showing is a position of vulnerability for most people, you have to be very sensitive about it. You definitely will find people get upset if you use those vulnerabilities against them.
Having one's inner self showing is a position of vulnerability for most people, you have to be very sensitive about it. You definitely will find people get upset if you use those vulnerabilities against them.
I agree very much. And not only this, I find people are much more accepting of their own flaws and vulnerabilities which lie beneath the cracks if you have a benevolent attitude toward them. I hope this can allow them to also more accepting of ours in return, but I can't speak for the truth of that part.
I dont need to explain. Like i said, this doesnt apply to everyone, but as a sweeping generalization, it is harder to initiate relationships with an artist. This just comes from personal experience. so both 1 and 2 of your complaints are invalid.
Im not sure why you got so angry over this post, or if it was just you standing up to something that doesnt exist. But I am confused by your aggresive reaction.
Moog has valid points, and I dont disagree. So why get so touchy?
I was neither angry, aggressive, nor touchy, merely pointing out the flaws of your post. My points aren't invalid and your saying such and inability/refusal to back your claim up with facts (or even personal anecdotes) is unwarrantedly disrespectful and either illogical or lazy. And what is the purpose of posting a thread when you're not open to discussing what you've written? I suppose you can accurately consider this post mildly aggressive, though, and for exactly the reasons Lace-Bane was talking about: You misread me and proceeded to sling a false accusation, and people don't like when that happens.
Lace-Bane wrote:
I have to say that I'm confused on how you found Kaybee's post even remotely aggressive . She was just stating that the point of this thread was never explained in the initial post. So with a thread name of "Artists and Love" and then skipping that topic entirely to talk about mind reading actually does mean you should have explained it.
. She was just stating that the point of this thread was never explained in the initial post. So with a thread name of "Artists and Love" and then skipping that topic entirely to talk about mind reading actually does mean you should have explained it.Yes, thank you, Lace-Bane. That is entirely correct.
thats the thing. I wasnt slining false accusations. I was confused because i read the post as aggresive when it wasnt meant as such.
if you will look back, I replied to esther with a comment that i may indeed have misinterpreted you.
but it isnt about specifics, its about how artists think [sweeping generalization] that some perfect person will come and fix everything.
But then again, also let them go and do whatever they want, with whomever they want, if you catch my tounge in cheekness :p
I had misinterpreted it as aggresive due to the list as to why my topic wasnt up to standard, when in my mind, i thought it was.
Do you understand why i took it the way i did?
07 Mar 2011, 2:10 am
07 Mar 2011, 8:17 am
bewarethebob wrote:
thats the thing. I wasnt slining false accusations. I was confused because i read the post as aggresive when it wasnt meant as such.
That's what made the accusation false.
Quote:
I had misinterpreted it as aggresive due to the list as to why my topic wasnt up to standard, when in my mind, i thought it was.
Do you understand why i took it the way i did?
Do you understand why i took it the way i did?
I understand why you took it that way, but lists aren't always aggressive. I wasn't being aggressive with point three, was I? Anyway, I never thought there was anything wrong with the topic--just that the title doesn't match the topic (and it still doesn't seem to), and that's fine, though it will make it less likely that people who are interested in the topic of "cracking" people will find this thread.
| Similar Topics | |
|---|---|
| What Do You Love to Play? |
02 Jul 2025, 11:12 am |
| Fed up about my love life |
14 Jul 2025, 4:01 pm |
| All's Fair In Love And War |
15 Jul 2025, 12:22 pm |
| God I Fudging Love This Website |
05 May 2025, 12:00 pm |
