The man I love is talking about death

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Please help me understand what is going on and what to do. I love a very bright intelligent man who is a wonderful writer. He is a professional man who has spent his life helping adolescents.
He had a short marriage followed by a serious relationship that also failed. My friend, this man I love, is so depressed he has been telling me and a number of other women (all his friends except one are women) that everyone has abandoned him just because he is different. He has always treasured his alone time and when he was 16 entered a program to become a priest (a private Catholic high school). Before he that was finalized, and after 5 years of that type of religious isolation he left the seminary.
But we have not abandoned him! He is not alone. He actually does things to push people away I think unknowingly.
Now he talks of suicide. He has just been diagnosed with Asperger's and in his mind that seems to have justified his belief that no one wants him because there is something 'wrong' with him.
I need help! I need a better picture! Please!

I'm not sure how this is possible. This is a man with a woman who loves him. How can he not feel wanted?

Unfortunately, logic does not apply to depression.

Indeed it doesn't. I've been about as low as you can go at one point. However, during that time, I had no friends to speak of, I couldn't stand my siblings, I was failing school, and my parents didn't have time for me. Luckily, I've rebounded, and I love my life. This only came about because I found people who cared about me.

To the OP; Let this man know that you care. I can almost guarantee that he will push you away, but you must not stop. Hang around. Call often. The last thing a depressed person needs is to feel ignored or forgotten, so do not let him. Doing so may damage your relationship, but it's what must be done.

It's only natural for someone who is lonely to feel depressed about it. Perhaps he can find solace in his religion? It's not up to you to "do something". The best you can do is love, support, and accept him unconditionally.

I think you might want to consider an "intervention" of sorts. Gather his friends, invite him over, have everyone tell him how much they care, and have some referrals for a good therapist or two ready to hand him. He would probably benefit greatly from working with a good therapist right now, and potentially some anti-depressant medication. Good luck.

I also feel like I have not much to live for sometimes.

People don't like me and ignore me all the time, women don't like me and ignore me too, I have no job and I will never be able to drive a car.

Hell if I became roadkill tommorow, I'm sure almost no one will notice and I surely won't be missed.

I'd say just keep trying to get closer to him. Point out when he says things like nobody cares about him... and say that you do. He might keep pushing you away, but repetition can break that in aspies. It could also be some "test" he's contrived in his head: if someone keeps coming back even after you've pushed them away, they must actually care abotu you...

completely agree with this! my BF used to talk a lot about death too, he has periods of depression as a result of a very bad past and he has AS, so it took a long time to get through to him, he too was convinced no one loved him and no one ever could, and i continued to show him i care and love him and i have finally gotten through to him, he is happier now, the talks of death are over and the depression still comes back but he doesn't push me away anymore during these moments, and the biggest difference is now when he is depressed he knows it will pass again and he doesn't let it swallow him.....keep showing you love him, he will get the message!! it took me 6 years....and he pushed me away too and also used it as some sort of "test" and i passed it, i guess......

Show him this website.

http://www.cracked.com/article_15658_th ... guide.html