Why wouldn't you date the user above you?

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A wayfaring stranger - nothing is as suspicious as one of those people who can't settle down...

Because...

I am a straight female in a relationship, and I don't care for long-distance relationships.

Might poo in my house plants.

Doesn't believe in organic fertilizers.

because I'd rather date a caveman than a dinosaur

Her serrated teeth aren't sharp enough. Besides, you basically would be dating a caveman, because I just had one for dinner. I could probably produce some largely intact parts of him!

I wouldn't date the above user because I'm concerned that they might have a fetish for serrated sharp teeth, and that I could become treated like a sex object rather than being valued for my personality.

Because if she doesn't want to be treated like a sex object, she shouldn't flaunt those teeth of hers like that!

Doesn't realize that the tentacles are far and away the best part. Maybe he should have looked twice.

Likes tentacles and evo psych - nuff' said.

because that sounds like a japaneese magazine

Because I'm way cooler than any Japanese magazine. And Chinese are sexier

Because Japanese magazines are awesome, and I can't speak Chinese.

Because she looks angry, and I very much would like a laid-back relationship

Fair enough. Very wise.
When I get nervous, I sometimes devour my dates with whirling serrated teeth.... and I would feel bad about devouring somebody that cute and chirpy.

smells fishy to me