The manifesto of the lonely aspie

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1814
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24 Aug 2012, 4:17 pm

I am an aspie.

I will probably live the rest of my adult life on my own.

I will never be able to befriend anyone.

No girl will ever find me attractive, no matter how attractive I find them.

I will forever remain a virgin.

I will never marry.

I will never have children.

I will always be the only person in the cinema or restaurant on his own.

I will get strange looks on the street from people at my age for the rest of my life.

Apart from my family and the government, nobody will ever know that I exist.


Am I the only one who feels just like this?



nessa238
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24 Aug 2012, 4:28 pm

I think it's better to have a more positive mindset and start working towards achieving your goals.
Stop giving yourself negative messages as there's no reason at all why you shouldn't achieve whatever you set your mind on if you want it badly enough.



StevieC
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24 Aug 2012, 5:27 pm

i was depressed enough before reading this 8O


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Fiz
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24 Aug 2012, 5:40 pm

1814, if this is what you keep telling yourself then this is what will happen. It is what some would call a self-fulfilling prophecy. I know its difficult as I used to think like this but you need to look at the list you have written on here and replace with more positive statements one at a time.

I used to think that no-one would be attracted to me, want to marry me etc and now I am engaged to be married and we have actually discussed children and are looking to buy a house together. I am also on the autistic spectrum yet my fiance is not.


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nessa238
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24 Aug 2012, 5:43 pm

I strongly recommend this book - 'The Secret' by Rhonda Byrne:-

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Secret-Rhonda-B ... 074356619X



Mike_Garrick
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24 Aug 2012, 5:50 pm

Sounds like me.
Except the kids part, I hate kids and have no wish to pass on my defective genetics to another generation to suffer.



KaminariNoKage
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24 Aug 2012, 6:59 pm

nessa238 wrote:
I strongly recommend this book - 'The Secret' by Rhonda Byrne:-

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Secret-Rhonda-B ... 074356619X


Also a movie. And yes, highly recommend. Plus This Video

I was once told that people like me are the reason why relationships fail and society is going downhill - among other things. If you are ever bored one day, why not set out to prove things like this wrong? You decide who you are. Being an Aspie just means your brain works a little different than "normal" people.



redrobin62
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24 Aug 2012, 7:35 pm

This thread could've been written by me. I don't exactly call myself ugly. It's just that trying to even get into a relationship seems troublesome and probably counter productive. Anyway, I'm not fully suicidal because I'm writing fiction, my revisited special interest.



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24 Aug 2012, 7:38 pm

With such a set of negative beliefs, framing your every interaction, you will probably get just that.


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nessa238
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24 Aug 2012, 7:41 pm

redrobin62 wrote:
This thread could've been written by me. I don't exactly call myself ugly. It's just that trying to even get into a relationship seems troublesome and probably counter productive. Anyway, I'm not fully suicidal because I'm writing fiction, my revisited special interest.


Relationships are troublesome; life is troublesome full stop - anything worth having in life is invariably troublesome ie you often go through a lot of trouble and pain to get to the good stuff but on balance it's worth it for the experiences you gain.



redrobin62
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24 Aug 2012, 8:08 pm

I think sometimes relationships are like jobs - designed to deliver to you, in spades, pain, misery and suffering. Why bother?



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24 Aug 2012, 8:43 pm

That post is not describing loneliness. It's describing pessimism.



Mike_Garrick
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24 Aug 2012, 8:50 pm

Plodder wrote:
That post is not describing loneliness. It's describing pessimism.

Some would say realism.
Kind of unrealistic to think that its not going to be an uphill battle for most of us to have anything resembling what most people take for granted socially and romantically.



Comp_Geek_573
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24 Aug 2012, 9:22 pm

What if you could prove just ONE of those statements wrong? Making a friend (could be someone else with Asperger's or autism!) sounds to me like a good place to start.

Once that's done, you'll have something to be proud of and you can tackle another. And so on. You could eventually prove them all wrong, or else decide it's better for you without kids, or a relationship, or something.

I've at least decided it's better for me if I don't do one-night stands, and wait for true love even if I end up that 40 (or more) year old virgin.


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MacDragard
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24 Aug 2012, 11:54 pm

Obviously what happened was something drove the OP to start this thread, which may have reminded him of every bad thing that has happened to him regarding women and whatnot, and he's looking for sympathy from people and for people to prove what he says about himself wrong. The only way I know this is because I have made similar posts about myself in the past...

To the OP, you know yourself better than anyone else. You are what you tell yourself and others, so if you say you're a loser that will never attract women....well that's true because you have set that frame for yourself by constantly telling yourself that to the point where it becomes canon. How do you expect women to like you if you don't even like yourself? You need to stop the self-defeating negative attitude RIGHT NOW because all it will do is lead you down a path of destruction.



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25 Aug 2012, 7:38 am

Mike_Garrick wrote:
Plodder wrote:
That post is not describing loneliness. It's describing pessimism.

Some would say realism.
Kind of unrealistic to think that its not going to be an uphill battle for most of us to have anything resembling what most people take for granted socially and romantically.


It's almost as though the OP is taking an oath, or prophesying. He utterly believes that those negative statements are going to come true.

I do not think that is realism. It's definitely pessimism, in my opinion. But of course you are free to disagree with someone else's opinion. :)