Do girls find it extra hot when big guys bully small guys?

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Nonperson
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25 May 2013, 1:14 pm

Ratae wrote:
In college, around age 17-20, I used to get bigger guys bully me all the time. I noticed all these guys were very popular with the ladies. They were the sterotypical 'jocks'. They all had girlfriends but still felt the need to pick on and dominate me even though i had 0 girlfriends. I'm sure their bullying ways were not unnoticed by such ladies.

You're "pretty sure"? Why? Were they standing there cheering them on? Maybe those guys just did it to get the dopamine rush from "winning".

Ratae wrote:
So, ladies, do you like this kind of macho, dominant behaviour in males? I mean, women are attracted to dominance right? And many ladies love the stronger-built looking chaps that can protect them from other males. So why SHOULD they not be attracted to male bullies that have a physical authority over smaller, weaker men.? I mean that's the order of things in animal kingdom - the larger males dominate and bully the smaller males, so why shouldn't it be that way with humans?


Somehow I have the feeling I'm about to be told I don't know what I like, but for what it's worth, no, I don't. I like guys who are kind and helpful to weaker guys (weaker in whatever way, possibly less intelligent guys). In fact one of the first things that attracted me to my husband was seeing him patiently help out a guy who was less intelligent and knowledgeable than he was. From an evolutionary standpoint, why would I choose a guy who makes enemies for himself when I could have one with leadership qualities?



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25 May 2013, 1:18 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I don't think bullies' gfs are often aware of the bullying practice their bfs are doing, high school guys often have gfs from other class or even from other school.

Or they often fail to realize that what's happening is bullying and think it's just "tough guys' playing" instead. Bullies usually don't go "full violent bullying" mode on their victims in the presence of girls


This, also.



jlsvc92
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25 May 2013, 2:04 pm

Hmmm I don't think it's directly connected...

I've been bullied physically once when I was 14 a 16 year old guy hit me for no reason with no word exchange and since I was the big fat strong kid it ended with me without a single scratch except the small wounds in my knuckles and him beated until he was knocked out and for some reason he became extra popular for a short period of time with girls and it was like "ohhhh poor you" (until his face recovered normal color), I don't really know why when everyone knew that he was the one who started the fight.

If it was connected I would have been the popular one.

Good decission BTW, got a huge load of respect after that and nobody ever messed up with me again.



jkrane
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24 May 2016, 4:46 pm

Ratae wrote:
I used to be a small, weak-looking, timid guy from my middle teens to early 20's and hated it. 5ft7 to 5ft9 and ranging from 110lbs to 130lbs from ages 17-21.

In college, around age 17-20, I used to get bigger guys bully me all the time. I noticed all these guys were very popular with the ladies. They were the sterotypical 'jocks'. They all had girlfriends but still felt the need to pick on and dominate me even though i had 0 girlfriends. I'm sure their bullying ways were not unnoticed by such ladies.

So, ladies, do you like this kind of macho, dominant behaviour in males? I mean, women are attracted to dominance right? And many ladies love the stronger-built looking chaps that can protect them from other males. So why SHOULD they not be attracted to male bullies that have a physical authority over smaller, weaker men.? I mean that's the order of things in animal kingdom - the larger males dominate and bully the smaller males, so why shouldn't it be that way with humans?


They generally don't bully in front of women, unless the women initiate the bullying, then the jock will back them up. It's actually pretty pathetic for a big guy to pick on someone much smaller than them. Women see that as a man beating up a child, and it's kind of a turn off for them.

Women are more aroused by a fair fight between two evenly matched opponents, than one big guy picking on a small guy. It just looks pathetic.

It also depends on the woman, too.



seaweed
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24 May 2016, 8:05 pm

you're right, people are generally assholes. assholes are attracted to other assholes.
my advice is, don't try to attract assholes if you're not an as*hole.
women who aren't assholes will find it hot if you're not an as*hole.



kraftiekortie
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24 May 2016, 8:34 pm

How do people come up with this crap idea for a thread?

I actually don't believe most people are assholes.



Xenosparadox
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26 May 2016, 2:01 pm

seaweed wrote:
you're right, people are generally assholes. assholes are attracted to other assholes.
my advice is, don't try to attract assholes if you're not an as*hole.
women who aren't assholes will find it hot if you're not an as*hole.


Unfortunately, this is not universally true and often untrue. Let's put it this way: insecure women who aren't assholes often are attracted to as*hole men. Do not make the naive assumption that people are rational when it comes to dating, relationships, and sex.

So if you are a guy who is not an as*hole, then avoid women who are insecure and/or have baggage+dramatic tendencies. Your temperament will leave them feeling unsatisfied and bored. And this is particularly true when it comes to women with personality and anxiety disorders, like borderline and PTSD(though the latter isn't always true-but women who had an abusive male father or father figure growing up will unconsciously seek out men like him because that is what feels normal to them).



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27 May 2016, 8:17 pm

Watch any animal mating documentaries and you'll see it's always two males fighting with the females always going for the victors. Human women are no different. Subconsciously they like seeing dominance too.


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28 May 2016, 8:11 am

DarkRain wrote:
Ratae wrote:
DarkRain wrote:
No. That kind of behavior is disgusting and a complete turn-off. There's no excuse for bullying of any sort.


Females of all species get aroused by seeing the 'alpha males' AMOG/dominate the lesser males. Why should humans be any different?

Don't tell me you still believe in the Disney Movie version of life sold to you by your parents and the mainstream media.

All through my youth all i saw was the cutest girls dating the as*hole bullies and I got nothing. Why is there no truth in it. I'm sure not all these girls were wrong in what they liked. A small, skinny guy that can't fight other men and win just doesn't appeal to them.


I don't get aroused by "alpha males," believe it or not. They might have muscles, but a lot of them don't have brains, thus making them complete idiots. Idiots do not turn me on. And no, I was not sold any Disney movie version of life. I know what it's like to be bullied; do you honestly think I want to date guys who bully others? I think not.

You do realize there are muscular men who are intelligent, right?



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28 May 2016, 8:20 am

Ratae wrote:
I used to be a small, weak-looking, timid guy from my middle teens to early 20's and hated it. 5ft7 to 5ft9 and ranging from 110lbs to 130lbs from ages 17-21.

In college, around age 17-20, I used to get bigger guys bully me all the time. I noticed all these guys were very popular with the ladies. They were the sterotypical 'jocks'. They all had girlfriends but still felt the need to pick on and dominate me even though i had 0 girlfriends. I'm sure their bullying ways were not unnoticed by such ladies.

So, ladies, do you like this kind of macho, dominant behaviour in males? I mean, women are attracted to dominance right? And many ladies love the stronger-built looking chaps that can protect them from other males. So why SHOULD they not be attracted to male bullies that have a physical authority over smaller, weaker men.? I mean that's the order of things in animal kingdom - the larger males dominate and bully the smaller males, so why shouldn't it be that way with humans?


The problem that inevitably comes up in this types of discussions is that a male complains about not getting the female attention they want, discusses how confused they are about this, and then proceeds to recognize categories of or individuality in males while addressing females as a whole. Has anyone in history ever said, "Label me, you wild animal!" in the throes of passion? One reason you may not be attracting people is because you aren't seeing them as people.

Also, the guys who bullied you were popular with the women they were popular with, not all women. Your complaint also strangely implies that you must be one of the males these bullies are protecting those women from.


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28 May 2016, 8:34 am

Teenagers are the dumbest people on the planet. Don't worry about it.



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28 May 2016, 12:05 pm

Bullying is a complete turn off in what ever form. Someone who protects other weaker people is far more attractive to women as it displays the protector attitude that women seek when looking for a mate.

It's not the dominance itself that is attractive biologically but the ability of a man to be a protector for a women and her future offspring.



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28 May 2016, 12:13 pm

Whats so macho and powerful about a guy picking on someone who is smaller and less mean than they are? Someone who can't even fight back and defend themselves? That's about as unattractive as it gets IMO.

If some guy kicked a puppy, people would find that horrible and he'd probably get arrested. So why is it "okay" when it's a human? What a stupid world. :x



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28 May 2016, 12:24 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
Whats so macho and powerful about a guy picking on someone who is smaller and less mean than they are? Someone who can't even fight back and defend themselves? That's about as unattractive as it gets IMO.

If some guy kicked a puppy, people would find that horrible and he'd probably get arrested. So why is it "okay" when it's a human? What a stupid world. :x


The bully probably isn't afraid the woman will want to have sex with the dog :)

Sorry, couldn't resist...I agree with you, otherwise.


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28 May 2016, 12:25 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
Whats so macho and powerful about a guy picking on someone who is smaller and less mean than they are? Someone who can't even fight back and defend themselves? That's about as unattractive as it gets IMO


This. I think if a guy goes around constantly looking for ways to assert his dominance, that shows some real insecurity on his part. Yeah some women will find that attractive, but I'd hardly say it's the norm.