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27 Apr 2013, 9:38 pm

PsychoSarah wrote:
But what if they approve?


What i do is never correct so f**k THEM



PsychoSarah
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27 Apr 2013, 9:40 pm

I suppose it is safe to assume that you crap in a toilet as opposed to the floor, correct? That is at least one action you do that society approves of :D



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27 Apr 2013, 9:42 pm

PsychoSarah wrote:
I suppose it is safe to assume that you crap in a toilet as opposed to the floor, correct? That is at least one action you do that society approves of :D



I'm still hygienic xD



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27 Apr 2013, 9:44 pm

That's good to hear. It would have been shocking, disgusting, and funny if you had said you didn't do that either.



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27 Apr 2013, 10:57 pm

appletheclown, quite a lot to reply to, but who you are is all relative, imo. "Who you are" is subjective. Even doing things as simple as losing weight can drastically affect "who you are." Just look at any weight loss transformation picture. For me, even losing 40-50lbs, when I got my license picture retaken after 3 years, the computer's facial recognition software didn't even recognize me as the same person. I was in essence, no longer the same person. Even though I am still me. So anyway, my philosophical rant is, "who you are" is irrelevant, as it's not static, it's changeable by circumstances and your decisions. Should I hate the girls who hated me while I was fat and ugly and unkempt, even if those same girls think I'm hot now? I think I might make a separate post about this topic, actually.

Also, I was not talking about you (not everything said on this site is personally directed towards you,) I was just saying in general, that was my experience with working out. Yes working out is awesome, no, it's not a panacea for your social problems.

As far as the used car salesman thing, again, not in reference to you (however most girls probably don't want hobos with shotguns for boyfriends or husbands.) What I mean is, just working out alone, improving your looks, etc, will basically only help you that far if nothing else is improved along with it. You can only have superficial short term interactions with girls that way, because longterm, they figure out you're "broken" because you have Aspergers, and most don't want to stay around. With superficial short term interactions, I mean, I guess it seems pretty simple. You pretty much just go "Hey, you're hot, wanna screw?" and I think it's about that easy if you're super hot. You do what is called "hooking up." In this sense, you're basically just a used car salesman selling your cock for casual sex. And no, I've never went to clubs, never really drank, never done drugs, I'm just saying from what I know and what I've been offered.

Anyway, back to dragging down the OP...

One thing, you do see a surprising proportion of the people on this site with relationships. So maybe there's hope. Or maybe not. Even then, once you get into a relationship, it can be a shitstorm anyway, as you probably know from a bunch of various people in your life. So maybe everything just sucks, since we're being pessimistic here. Is it better to be a 40 Year Old Virgin, or 40 year old divorced man with two kids he sees on the weekend, with a good portion of his money going to child support and having occasional conversations with his ex-wife, and going to bars alone looking for other random divorced/cheating women your age?



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27 Apr 2013, 11:00 pm

1000Knives, I think appletheclown left the site a while back. Apparently, I have earned myself an internet stalker, which is weird, most of the time, guys avoid me :?



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28 Apr 2013, 12:14 am

1000Knives wrote:
appletheclown wrote:
Or you could lower your princess leia standards and go out with someone with a more counter-cultural group. Besides how are all the super hot ladies ever going to marry a handsome aspie man if all we do is whine and sit on our arse? You got the power! You got to know that given your age, becoming physically fit will be easier. Try and start an exercise regimine, for example I bike at least a mile a day, ladies love legs of steel! I may be 19, but I still have less time than you. Plus, for starters, your still a teenager, you haven't gained the maturity of the man you will become, or the defining character you are going to be. Please for now, be yourself, stay fit, and start to make the effort now to become skilled socially, it will help you a lot more than waiting like a lot of us did. Your young, stay cool, be respectful, and love ladies for who they are as a whole and not just looks and you will be quite alright.


Working out only helps you superficially. It makes cashiers at the supermarket smile at you instead of looking at you in disgust, but the main problem with Aspergers is our terrible social skills and general suckiness at life. How is this proved? There's plenty of ugly looking dudes with girlfriends, many times hotter girlfriends than them by a large margin. If you work out, the best that alone will get you is hookups with random girls at clubs or something if you're willing to go outside and give girls basically a used car salesman script.


Exactly, achieving a better body and being more attractive isn't a panacea for every social problem, the ability to make friends, to maintain relationships and to have a normal social life is something that will help even more but it is something that we lack. Having a good body can help to attract women but in a superficial and sexual way rather than in a connective or social way.

It is better if you find someone through an emotional connection rather than a sexual connection but the trouble is we either have one or the other, it's difficult to have an emotional connection when you are on the spectrum because as you said girls will recognise you as "broken" once they get close enough.

Working out to me is as vital as eating or showering, I work out for the recreational purposes, the mental and physical benefits I feel.



boywonder
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28 Apr 2013, 12:49 am

Working out and becoming fit is so much more than just having a six pack or looking good
Its much more about feeling good and improving the function of your internal organs, your detoxification pathways, improved blood flow to the gonads....



The_Face_of_Boo
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28 Apr 2013, 3:50 am

mikassyna wrote:
Being an aspie girl has some advantages over being an aspie guy from my perspective. The first one being that NT guys are the ones who will try to pick you up. You won't have to try to put yourself on the line as much initially in that respect. Sorry but yes it is a continuing double standard.

If you can figure out how to doll yourself up adequately, you will get hit on, and that can certainly boost your self-esteem. Girls have a much easier time getting action than guys, because guys are always looking for it.

HOWEVER, we are only talking about sex here. We are not talking about relationships, which are IMO much harder to accomplish. So if you just want to lose your virginity I don't think there will be a lack of dudes willing to take on that job. You just have to make it known that's what you want. They will only decline if they think it will mean you will get all freaky and committed on them if that's not what they want.

I lost my virginity relatively young (for this site). I was on a mission to get it done and over with and it was not under ideal circumstances, but I did manage to do what I set out to do.




And this helps the OP how?? He's a guy.


And I disagree, being an aspie girl makes it easier to accomplish sex AND relationships too, not just sex.

Many members here try hard to equalize the struggles between the genders when it comes to dating, but reality is that things are never equal in dating, even among NTs, no matter how many try to deny this.



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28 Apr 2013, 6:23 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
And this helps the OP how?? He's a guy.


OMG so sorry, my bad. 8O



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28 Apr 2013, 6:31 am

Guys, guys, guys. What did I say that didn't make sense? And psychosarah, if its too much I'll stop hitting on you, did not want to creep you out at all, sorry. But getting back to the point, my outlook is a lot less hopeless, I'm not going after casual sex, and there is no such thing as settling for someone in my book. Sex is not going to be that kind of sex for me, and if I have to look for a serious relationship into my 40's I will, ladies in their 40's are still quite attractive, and the game of used car salesman script is not my game. I am the custom ordered drift racing dealer, that also sells tanks. If I was to have such a bleak outlook on life, and such a low value on exercising and other things, my life would not be nearly as happy or even would I want to do these things at all. Please, exercising doesn't get you just sex, it allows you to obtain more blue collar work, money, when paired with boxing or self defense classes you are better apt to protect yourself, yourself esteem will go up, in some cases alleviate depression caused by staying inside way too long, giving you a healthy body, exercising your heart and lungs, putting a few more years on your life and in general making your life more healthy, that is what exercising can do.

I don't do the used car salesmen thing, and I already said, I can go after women when I need to, like I haven't already. I have the ability, and I was in my first post, helping the op out anyways, not trying to argue with anyone.


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28 Apr 2013, 6:43 am

If you believe you are a broken man, you are a broken man. Believing you can do with what you have the things that NT's do, that is what I think I can do. They will think I am a 'broken man'? Wolfheart, seriously you believe that load of rubbish? Being an aspie just means you will have a harder time with withe these things, it doesn't mean there are not women out there who don't think of you as a normal person. I am in no way broken, and will not waste my time with women who consider asd and autistic people as such, unless they are willing to learn. I am not broken, my no means at all. Aspeger's break me? No I will break it.


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28 Apr 2013, 6:46 am

PsychoSarah wrote:
1000Knives, I think appletheclown left the site a while back. Apparently, I have earned myself an internet stalker, which is weird, most of the time, guys avoid me :?



I'll stop, sorry I creeped you out. :(


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28 Apr 2013, 6:58 am

boywonder wrote:
Working out and becoming fit is so much more than just having a six pack or looking good
Its much more about feeling good and improving the function of your internal organs, your detoxification pathways, improved blood flow to the gonads....


That's very true since a random chick that a guy meets somewhere probably isn't going to see him with his shirt off in the first place. Unless they meet on the beach or something. Tank-tops don't look good at all either in my opinion regardless of how ripped the person wearing one is.



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28 Apr 2013, 6:59 am

1000Knives wrote:
appletheclown, quite a lot to reply to, but who you are is all relative, imo. "Who you are" is subjective. Even doing things as simple as losing weight can drastically affect "who you are." Just look at any weight loss transformation picture. For me, even losing 40-50lbs, when I got my license picture retaken after 3 years, the computer's facial recognition software didn't even recognize me as the same person. I was in essence, no longer the same person. Even though I am still me. So anyway, my philosophical rant is, "who you are" is irrelevant, as it's not static, it's changeable by circumstances and your decisions. Should I hate the girls who hated me while I was fat and ugly and unkempt, even if those same girls think I'm hot now? I think I might make a separate post about this topic, actually.

Also, I was not talking about you (not everything said on this site is personally directed towards you,) I was just saying in general, that was my experience with working out. Yes working out is awesome, no, it's not a panacea for your social problems.

As far as the used car salesman thing, again, not in reference to you (however most girls probably don't want hobos with shotguns for boyfriends or husbands.) What I mean is, just working out alone, improving your looks, etc, will basically only help you that far if nothing else is improved along with it. You can only have superficial short term interactions with girls that way, because longterm, they figure out you're "broken" because you have Aspergers, and most don't want to stay around. With superficial short term interactions, I mean, I guess it seems pretty simple. You pretty much just go "Hey, you're hot, wanna screw?" and I think it's about that easy if you're super hot. You do what is called "hooking up." In this sense, you're basically just a used car salesman selling your cock for casual sex. And no, I've never went to clubs, never really drank, never done drugs, I'm just saying from what I know and what I've been offered.

Anyway, back to dragging down the OP...

One thing, you do see a surprising proportion of the people on this site with relationships. So maybe there's hope. Or maybe not. Even then, once you get into a relationship, it can be a shitstorm anyway, as you probably know from a bunch of various people in your life. So maybe everything just sucks, since we're being pessimistic here. Is it better to be a 40 Year Old Virgin, or 40 year old divorced man with two kids he sees on the weekend, with a good portion of his money going to child support and having occasional conversations with his ex-wife, and going to bars alone looking for other random divorced/cheating women your age?



In general, what you said doesn't apply to me. That is why I said anything at all. I don't look at love philosophically anyways, I make it happen. But other than that, I actually have never been offered sex, but that in no way is going to make me lose confidence. And I am not being pessimistic, more of a an optimist who is brutally honest. I am not going after casual sex because sex doesn't give me some of the best feelings in life, I'm not because I care more about women than that. There is hope, hope is something someone makes for themselves.
I am not going to divorce my wife, no one is taking half or causing my kids to lack fatherly influence, and not seeing mom and dad loving each other like they should.

I'm not a hook, I am more of a hitch. And I am not selling my cock for sex, I am looking for something serious, how many times must I point this out. Aspies don't have to settle for casual sex, stop being so hopeless!


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28 Apr 2013, 7:10 am

Vincent287 wrote:
I am so scared. I see all of these aspies talking about heartbreaks and rejection. VIRGIN AFTER VIRGIN! Sure I am only 15 but seriously! As I get older I will become one of them. Their is no calm way of putting this! Im screwed!

your value is resident within yourself. i am very happy and i do not have any friends or fans that blow their trumpets in a rejoicing way that is relevant to how they see me.

i do not need friends because i am quite happy with who i am, and i can entertain myself eternally with what i think. i do not need external validation from other people because i do not care what they think (much).

my world is filled with only what i can produce, and i am full of indifference because i have no interest in how another persons world may be,

they were born with a different brain than me, so they can not tell me that i am wrong. i am very happy that i like myself because i am one of the few people who do.

if you think that your value is substantiated only by what others think of you, then you have not enough self love.
i really could not care whether i am carried on the shoulders of fans, or whether i have to crawl through the streets alone and uncared for.

if you love being you, then that is a very good reason for other people to check you out.
if they feel insecure, then your automatic happiness with how you are will attract them very much.

whatever.