I'm so sick of this whole aspie women have it easier crap

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According to which sources?

Whilst I'm sure there are plenty of aspie women looking for loving relationships, I haven't seen anything that says this is a rule of how they are and that they would all collectively say no to a good time (with the right person) just on principle.

I also contend that being approached by men means their only option is sex.

On the contrary, men don't "just want sex" as the stereotype goes - there are plenty of men out there looking for committed relationships.

What sort of thing do you mean. We can't change our attitude if we don't know what we're doing wrong.

Not even sure what you're on about here. I never said anything like that.

I never said that either. I said that Asperguys would more likely be happier with just sex than most Aspergirls would. I'd like to reiterate my point on reading comprehension. Don't feel too bad: Us autistics are notorious for having low verbal IQs.

Call me crazy, but I am noticing lately a trend of guys (of different ages) being demotivated or maybe not giving a damn to make first moves; and they prefer to stay single than doing it, are you seeing this in your areas?

If yes, then for those bastard guys in the world I tell them.:




Keep up the good work!!

Apart from "that is not reality", you haven't made a counter argument here, so I feel the real burden of proof and credibility lies with you.

Articles on the internet that are usually just self-perpetuated nonsense do not prove my credibility, any more than having a degree in psychology proves yours (especially as I can't and won't ask you to confirm that). I can however, quote directly from books. So there's no confusion, in the above post I did not mean men are all knocking on a womans door in a literal sense.

From Venus The Dark Side (chapter 5):

"Girls who just want to have fun, are often quite easy-going about dating men. If they want to drink too much, they will. If they want casual sex, they will get it. In fact, single women call most if not all the shots in their lives. A single guy may hope he gets laid when he's getting ready to go out for a night. But a woman already knows. If she decides to, she is far more likely to succeed than a man. A man is often portrayed as having all the power. It's a myth."

From Body Language - What you need to know by David Cohen (chapter 9):

"In Psychology Today, Monica Moore (1995) reported what is known as a meta analysis of studies of flirting. Looking at a mass of research, Moore found that women use 52 different non-verbal courtship behaviours. These included glancing, gazing, primping, preening, smiling, lip-licking, pouting, giggling, laughing and nodding. Her research slammed the myth that is always men who start the dance; often girls take the first step."

If we look at that again:

Her research slammed the myth that is always men who start the dance; often girls take the first step.

The fact is, it is a widespread myth and even expectation that men will make the first move. In reality women decide the partners, but myths and attitude relics will remain.

Bear in mind, the books in question have nothing at all to say about autism or aspergers, this is about NT behaviour, and only NT behaviour.

In a world full of NT's and NT 'rules', I don't see it as being realistic to project my expectations on anyone. The only constructive thing to do, is to live with the reality of things. When I've had dates it's not because women are doing all this work for me - approaching me, chatting me up, asking for my number, etc, it's because I put the majority of the work in for them (as most men are doing) that they were willing to put a little work back in, but this extra work and assumed responsibility will inescapably be hard for male aspies as it would if female aspies had these expectations were hanging over their heads.

It is also 'well known' that women are more promiscuous, but it's not difficult to see why that might be when every man out there has the larger portion of expectation on him to 'get the girl' (in other words, desirable women are 'surrounded' by men) or if he prefers to twiddle his thumbs, and not learn how to do every one of these things he will just get nothing. Does that sound easy?

Though as I said above, it's still besides the point even if there could possibly be indisputable 'proof' that I'm wrong. The point is many aspie women here claim those problems just don't exist for aspie men.

Yeah, I guess girls are the ones who really often do the first move through their gestures, body language, excessive flirting...etc

She selects through these ways and wait.... the "guy asking her out" part is just a final test for his confidence.

Maybe that's where some of the aspie women here fail?

Sadly, most guys have very low selection criteria , so they would try to take any opportunity they can get.

I must admit, the only girls I've ever dared to ask them out where very friendly, flirty and smiling to me.

That reminds me of girl whom I found very attractive at first but for some reason something about her made me lose interest to pursue her further, she very rarely smiles, her face is always totally expressionless, when I talked to her she was responsive but like a robot. With the absence of any sign of interest, I got discouraged and never tried to know her further. Then a female friend told me that she is likely likes me (I dunno why she told me so but maybe she knows something) but still I forgot about it.

I guess Cafeaulait, hurtloam and Hale_bopp have this problem.

I've only read this page but I just remembered this video from another thread http://www.wrongplanet.net/postp4731650 ... t=#4731650

"Courtship is almost always a matter of female choice. And in a bar it's the woman who makes the first move. She does this by producing an approach tell..."

OMG I has it so much easier being a female.....if you mean its easier to get laid by someone who will just abandon you.

OMG I has it so much easier being a female.....if you mean its easier to get laid by someone who will just abandon you.

Same here, they have to respond well, I consider her being willing to show that she can say yes to me (to a date but not to her bed) without much of a fuss, as being part of what she should she do. That's partly because I feel women see a date as too much of a big deal, but being relaxed in your company I think shows she's interested and may perhaps be more open to putting in some of the effort. I just can't be dealing with women who are 'interested but not that interested' or just act that way, and thus let me make all the moves.



I suppose clamming up may be a sign of being nervous around you. Not every girl is confident the same way not every guy is confident. Not smiling or being expressive must be an issue, I have in fact had a woman approach me in a nightclub and just insist that I smile, and when I bemusedly complied she told me "that's much better", then when I passed her again she insisted again that I smile. Result - I was nagged into smiling for the rest of the night.

OMG I has it so much easier being a female.....if you mean its easier to get laid by someone who will just abandon you.