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Have you experienced similar? (only answer if you are male)
yes 13%  13%  [ 8 ]
no 88%  88%  [ 56 ]
Total votes : 64

The_Face_of_Boo
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05 Feb 2014, 5:19 am

cavernio wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
Ann2011 wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
I don't consider it an act of bravery, more of a stupid thing to say. He really should have kept this personal and taken it to a psychologist rather than subject himself to every man and women on the planet with the internet. Just my personal opinion, it makes me cringe when I see this sort of thing on the internet.

I disagree. The OP never acted on these thoughts. There is a big difference between thinking something and doing it.

I think Love and Dating was the wrong forum, though. This topic couldn't have less to do with love and dating.


That isn't the point. The point is the high concentration of "creepiness" of aspies in society is brought on by threads like this.


What is this I don't even...

People are very aware of being able to not stereotype. If you feel that you're going to be thought of as a rapist because one aspie posted that he's thought about raping someone in real situation, then perhaps you should check how you perceive others yourself, as you seem unclear as how to distinguish a person from a group, thinking that everyone else will do the same to you. What you should be upset about is stereotyping...

You have NO RIGHT to get upset at someone for talking about themselves because you feel that is misrepresents you. How self-centered are you??

I too find it more towards the brave side that the OP posted about this. I don't know why people are aghast, we KNOW rape happens, rapists exist. That's why I'm not like 'omg, horror!' Perhaps the OP's post is going to help some poor young guy who's feeling something similar to go find a prostitute instead now. Anyways, I'm not sure how having a discussion about such a topic is a bad thing. Unless you think people are going to feel like it's suddenly more acceptable to rape people or something.

Rape's wrong, it shouldn't happen, but people have violent and criminal thoughts and sometimes actions too. Not talking about it doesn't change that.


lol



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05 Feb 2014, 5:51 am

leafplant wrote:
Well being of other humans is not best served by people having these kinds of attitudes and thinking that's acceptable. Thanks for pointing out how much you disrespect Eastern European students. I hope when your trial comes around that you find yourself facing a judge who was that student once.


What trial? He hasn't committed any crime. The OP mentions having disturbing thoughts but he never acted on them.



salamandaqwerty
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05 Feb 2014, 6:41 am

^

Nordmann wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
I don't consider it an act of bravery, more of a stupid thing to say. He really should have kept this personal and taken it to a psychologist rather than subject himself to every man and women on the planet with the internet. Just my personal opinion, it makes me cringe when I see this sort of thing on the internet.

Did you see that other "rapist" thread? Well threads like this online encourage the stereotype that aspie like people are rapists in the media.


In my country we had a case with a supposed aspie (according to court psych experts) going into a home and raping a woman in front of her 3-5y daughter. And for years there have been loads of news about the notorious trusemannen\the panty man who harass young girls.

You really think this thread have any impact whatsoever compared to all the bad press in real medias planet over? On a now long disclosed Norwegian forum an aspie girl complained about the aspies in news stories where too ugly too unstylish and where losers, she wanted only attractive successful aspies to be featured in order to make asperger look better.

I have not gone to a psych since I got this diagnosis 10y ago, and I have no interest in wasting money on nothing, infact what I would have to pay for a shrink I can f**k a ok looking student for in eastern Europe. I started this thread out of curiosity and I am not into pretending I am any more sympathetic than I am (yes I am stupid). I don`t think this is just personal either, rape is a common thing, while assault rape is not that common most places, here like everywhere in the west quite a few boys rape sleep drunk girls at parties and nachspiels I don`t think that is usually a power thing but a way to get p**** easy there and then and without that much risk depending on situation, and I would guess most who have done it and where not too drunk themselves did a calculation before putting it in.

8 yes, a bit unclear about what they account as similar though
35 no
But yeah it`s just me halebopp


leafplant is referring to this.
Nordmann's thoughts are just chilling and disturbing in my opinion


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Last edited by salamandaqwerty on 05 Feb 2014, 2:13 pm, edited 2 times in total.

The_Face_of_Boo
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05 Feb 2014, 6:45 am

Jono wrote:
leafplant wrote:
Well being of other humans is not best served by people having these kinds of attitudes and thinking that's acceptable. Thanks for pointing out how much you disrespect Eastern European students. I hope when your trial comes around that you find yourself facing a judge who was that student once.


What trial? He hasn't committed any crime. The OP mentions having disturbing thoughts but he never acted on them.


True that, but I think she believes, based on his tone and attitude, that he will commit something bad some time in the future.



cavernio
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05 Feb 2014, 8:42 am

Ummm, prostitutes exist, that's what nordmann's comment was about. Using a prostitute. I'm guessing prices vary drastically depending on where you are. It didn't seem like a racially biased or hateful comment to me at all. No wait, it was a hateful comment about psychiatrists. And as medical professionals who are probably just as subject to the whims of big pharma as other doctors, which affects everything from their studies to what they prescribe, I concur.

But it doesn't surprise me that the same people who are horrified that someone bring up their own dark thoughts about something that, to the OP, is a non-issue now (that's why they even could manage to bring it up in the first place I gather), would then get upset at the much more healthy way the person deals with their sexual urges as that too being too horrifying also.

Face it nordmann, nothing you can say will change their minds now, you're an evil person, any sexual thoughts or urges you have are evil, the way you have sex with hookers is evil and your opinions about disliking rape yourself will be ignored.


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Ann2011
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05 Feb 2014, 8:46 am

cavernio wrote:
Ummm, prostitutes exist, that's what nordmann's comment was about. Using a prostitute. I'm guessing prices vary drastically depending on where you are. It didn't seem like a racially biased or hateful comment to me at all. No wait, it was a hateful comment about psychiatrists. And as medical professionals who are probably just as subject to the whims of big pharma as other doctors, which affects everything from their studies to what they prescribe, I concur.

But it doesn't surprise me that the same people who are horrified that someone bring up their own dark thoughts about something that, to the OP, is a non-issue now (that's why they even could manage to bring it up in the first place I gather), would then get upset at the much more healthy way the person deals with their sexual urges as that too being too horrifying also.

Face it nordmann, nothing you can say will change their minds now, you're an evil person, any sexual thoughts or urges you have are evil, the way you have sex with hookers is evil and your opinions about disliking rape yourself will be ignored.


Seconded. If people were prosecuted for their thoughts we'd all be in jail.

And with regard to this being brought up and sullying the "public space;" this is a support forum. I can't think of a better place. (Although I still think L&D is the wrong subforum.)


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The_Face_of_Boo
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05 Feb 2014, 9:12 am

Fine, thing is, that I personally find it very offensive to imply that men get rape ideas due to lack of sex; there was once a female user said (I think it was you Ann) that men with no sex life have lower self-control and lower sense of what's wrong and right, I found this pretty offensive too.

I dunno where you get all those correlations, either you can read minds or I am not that sexual after all.



Ann2011
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05 Feb 2014, 9:24 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Fine, thing is, that I personally find it very offensive to imply that men get rape ideas due to lack of sex; there was once a female user said (I think it was you Ann) that men with no sex life have lower self-control and lower sense of what's wrong and right, I found this pretty offensive too.

Can you provide the reference for that. I'd like to know for sure.

I don't necessarily think that lack of sex will lead to rape thoughts, and don't think that plenty of sex leads to their absence.


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05 Feb 2014, 9:47 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Fine, thing is, that I personally find it very offensive to imply that men get rape ideas due to lack of sex; there was once a female user said (I think it was you Ann) that men with no sex life have lower self-control and lower sense of what's wrong and right, I found this pretty offensive too.

I dunno where you get all those correlations, either you can read minds or I am not that sexual after all.

There's an entire online movement built around this premise:
http://www.involuntarycelibacy.com/

One of the fundemental caviats is that sexual frustration and rejection by women is the root cause for most male violence (including rape and killing sprees.) I've even read stuff seriously arguing that the Sandy Hook and Colombine shootings would have been prevented if the popular pretty girls would have had sex with these creepers in highschool. Ironically enough, despite their claims being just about the most misandrist thing ever (men are just animals who can't control themselves around a skirt and cleavage) they are big in the men's rights movement.



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05 Feb 2014, 10:39 am

Jono wrote:
leafplant wrote:
Well being of other humans is not best served by people having these kinds of attitudes and thinking that's acceptable. Thanks for pointing out how much you disrespect Eastern European students. I hope when your trial comes around that you find yourself facing a judge who was that student once.


What trial? He hasn't committed any crime. The OP mentions having disturbing thoughts but he never acted on them.


Read his post on page 6.


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Jono
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05 Feb 2014, 3:03 pm

Geekonychus wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Fine, thing is, that I personally find it very offensive to imply that men get rape ideas due to lack of sex; there was once a female user said (I think it was you Ann) that men with no sex life have lower self-control and lower sense of what's wrong and right, I found this pretty offensive too.

I dunno where you get all those correlations, either you can read minds or I am not that sexual after all.

There's an entire online movement built around this premise:
http://www.involuntarycelibacy.com/

One of the fundemental caviats is that sexual frustration and rejection by women is the root cause for most male violence (including rape and killing sprees.) I've even read stuff seriously arguing that the Sandy Hook and Colombine shootings would have been prevented if the popular pretty girls would have had sex with these creepers in highschool. Ironically enough, despite their claims being just about the most misandrist thing ever (men are just animals who can't control themselves around a skirt and cleavage) they are big in the men's rights movement.


I don't understand. I didn't read anything in your link that says that involuntary celibacy leads to male violence. In any case, the term was actually coined by an actual professor of sociology and it doesn't necessarily have the connotations that you're applying to it. It simply means anyone who has not engaged in sexual intercourse for reasons other than choice, that does not necessarily mean that men who are involuntarily celibate would be prone to thinking about rape. Also, the professor who coined the term, applied it to both genders, so women can be involuntary celibate too:

http://abchannel.lima-city.de/artikel/16-involuntary-celibacy-1.html



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05 Feb 2014, 5:48 pm

The OP never said that lack of sex leads to rape. The OP just said ever since he had sex, he has not had those episodes. He also said he prefers prostitutes that act as a girlfriend. He still isn't asking for rape stories as if they excite them.

All of these points lead me to believe he either had the beginnings of OCD, or that he had a possibility to become a predator but didn't.

God forbid people with OCD tell their thoughts here. I've had thoughts of brutally murdering someone. I've had thoughts about rape, raping people, molesting children, and others. Yet, I find these things horrible, similarly to how the OP finds rape horrible. Now, I've never calculated the risks of doing such a crime as the OP did, true. However, I DO know of people with OCD who were terrified of killing someone. These would be people they loved. I even knew a person with OCD who had obsessive thoughts about grabbing the knife, how they could do it, if they would get caught, etc. Naturally, this person was scared of themselves. They eventually never left their room for years until they received help.

Would this person have killed someone? Do rapists/murderers usually admit that they find the act disgusting? Even the rapists who rape using tools such as alcohol (which are a huge majority) seem to get excited when they talk about their acts.

It's far better to talk about these issues than to sweep them under the rug. True, love and dating isn't the best spot to discuss this. There are also rape victims here, and the OP was insensitive to both them* and possibly eastern asian students*. However, we have a person who not only thinks rape is horrible, but wanted to know if anyone else ever had this reaction. Like other abusers, rapists are usually manipulative and artificially charming so they aren't detected. This person has not acted like that. While we can speculate what his true intentions are, his words are reflecting that of a person who does not want to rape.

*I can see how some victims of rape would be offended by this post. How you word some things kind of implies lack of sex=men wanting to rape. However, I think it was more you didn't elaborate on that. I'm not offended here, I just can see how others would be. At the same time, you probably feel (because you were) verbally attacked and are trying to defend yourself.

*OP, people may have been freaking out about the eastern asian student thing because they thought you meant you would rape them. When you say student, a lot of very young female children are abused in these countries. They are raped and by sex tourists, and it goes unreported. If you mean university student and/or someone who is 16, you didn't specify, so people might assume younger and/or unwilling. I do admit, if you did mean any younger than 16 and/or forced, I would consider both of those rape. However, until I know what you meant, I will assume you meant legally of age and consenting because you said you prefer the girlfriend treatment type prostitution.



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05 Feb 2014, 8:25 pm

Rape scenes are fairly common in the BDSM scene, but they are negotiated by both parties first and limits are set and a safeword is used. Some people take it pretty far, even where the girl is fighting back and kicks and hits the guy. I knew a guy who was into BDSM and he was particularly fond of rape scenes and he liked them pretty heavy like that. However, he wouldn't ever actually rape anybody and never wanted to ACTUALLY rape a girl, he just liked having really rough sex where he held her down. He was an EMT and a fireman and had been on calls where somebody was actually raped and he said that the difference between real rape and a SM scene are night and day. In fact, in a rape scene, the girl can put a stop to it at any second just by saying the safe word.

About the original post though, urges to actually rape somebody aren't normal. I'd seriously get some help about that.


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05 Feb 2014, 9:58 pm

OliveOilMom wrote:
Rape scenes are fairly common in the BDSM scene, but they are negotiated by both parties first and limits are set and a safeword is used. Some people take it pretty far, even where the girl is fighting back and kicks and hits the guy. I knew a guy who was into BDSM and he was particularly fond of rape scenes and he liked them pretty heavy like that. However, he wouldn't ever actually rape anybody and never wanted to ACTUALLY rape a girl, he just liked having really rough sex where he held her down. He was an EMT and a fireman and had been on calls where somebody was actually raped and he said that the difference between real rape and a SM scene are night and day. In fact, in a rape scene, the girl can put a stop to it at any second just by saying the safe word.

About the original post though, urges to actually rape somebody aren't normal. I'd seriously get some help about that.


The girls go berserk often when smacked in the face during a SM rape scene because the dude broke the deal. It's always fun to watch, especially when the girl can fight, there are a few porn actresses who can really mess a guy up.

Night and day indeed. Porn is fictitious stuff where as you said there are plenty of signs and rules to abort mission. Real rape is real, scratch marks, broken nails, drawing blood, real tears.

I enjoy rough stuff as well, but just as porn we both know what's up.


Real life rape is for the very unstable and sad. Even if a semi disturbed individual would commit rape it would damage him as well after the act I believe.
You must be hyper cold and super damaged to rape and feel cool about it.


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05 Feb 2014, 10:53 pm

SoulcakeDuck wrote:
OliveOilMom wrote:
Rape scenes are fairly common in the BDSM scene, but they are negotiated by both parties first and limits are set and a safeword is used. Some people take it pretty far, even where the girl is fighting back and kicks and hits the guy. I knew a guy who was into BDSM and he was particularly fond of rape scenes and he liked them pretty heavy like that. However, he wouldn't ever actually rape anybody and never wanted to ACTUALLY rape a girl, he just liked having really rough sex where he held her down. He was an EMT and a fireman and had been on calls where somebody was actually raped and he said that the difference between real rape and a SM scene are night and day. In fact, in a rape scene, the girl can put a stop to it at any second just by saying the safe word.

About the original post though, urges to actually rape somebody aren't normal. I'd seriously get some help about that.


The girls go berserk often when smacked in the face during a SM rape scene because the dude broke the deal. It's always fun to watch, especially when the girl can fight, there are a few porn actresses who can really mess a guy up.

Night and day indeed. Porn is fictitious stuff where as you said there are plenty of signs and rules to abort mission. Real rape is real, scratch marks, broken nails, drawing blood, real tears.

I enjoy rough stuff as well, but just as porn we both know what's up.


Real life rape is for the very unstable and sad. Even if a semi disturbed individual would commit rape it would damage him as well after the act I believe.
You must be hyper cold and super damaged to rape and feel cool about it.


Yeah, you negotiate everything before you start when you do the BDSM scene. Some girls are ok with being slapped in the face and expect to be able to hit the guy like that too. If both parties are ok with that, then it's all good but most of the time from what I know, in real life, when two average people are just doing a rape scene and it's not on camera or porn or anything, people tend to forget some of the more important points they should have brought up before it started. Saying "tackle me, throw me down and rape me please but I'm going to fight back" rarely goes off that smoothly. Somebody is going to hit somebody else too hard then there will be hurt feelings and all that and I actually did hear of one time there was a messup about a safeword and that girl did go to the cops about it. Not good for either person.


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