how to kindly rebuff on okcupid??

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how do you rebuff someone who you have been talking to for a while?

I know it would be even ruder to just ignore them than people who have just messaged once.

I cant think of a way to get out of it, I have been very 'unsexy' and platonic and keep pointing out incompatibilities but it just makes him more keen and each message he adds a touch of flattery and romanticism.

I'm in the same exact situation with this one guy... He is a really nice, "high-quality" man but I just can't seem to get into him.
I tried to fade out once but he messaged me again saying "I thought I was interesting..." so I caved in and messaged him back.
I didn't want him to get discouraged and become bitter because of me. But I can't keep continue leading him on eighter. ugh

He started sending photos of himself topless and texting me all evening, and pestered me to send him photos (which i didnt) and I couldnt stand it any more so I told him 'I feel overwhelmed and think Im not ready for a relationship' and he replied 'no problem' but the next day he sent me a photo of his gigantic erection which really upset me, I reacted angryly and I told him not to contact me again and he has not.

I wont do online or any dating for now as its made me warey of men and not trust them, I have since ruminated loads over this guy, weather he targeted me as it said I was aspergers fat and old in my profile so he might have thought me an easy target. I would not trust someone liked me and was not just 'grooming' me. The whole incident has made me feel really bad.

I feel sorry for whoever he ends up with, if he does. Don't be warey of men in general, just stay off OKcupid, and don't trust anyone who says something too nice, too soon.

Yuzu, you don't owe that man a thing. You've already said you're not interested, you've done your part.

Most of the time they take your "no thanks" reply as a cue to try and engage in further conversation.

Why bother?

Free websites meant to interact with the opposite gender have plenty of that sort of creeps.

If you report them they can just create a new account since its free to signup .

Same scenario happens on places to exchange: kik/snapchat/whatever

This person probably sent a similar amount of pictures to any female that replied hoping to get them to send some back.


I dont really get it considering the amount of girls willing to put themselves on the internet willingly but my guess is that it has to do with the rush on acconvincing someone to do it