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Cafeaulait
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26 Nov 2014, 6:57 am

sly279 wrote:
ReticentJaeger wrote:
sly279 wrote:
Cafeaulait wrote:
Agreed with Boo. One of the most intelligent posts so far. Didn't know Boo had that much intellectual capacities.
And it has nothing to do with 'natural'. I don't have a preference and there is nothing 'unnatural' about that.


um you have said a few times you have a preference for intellectual/intelligent attractive men.
same as others preferences so sit on your imaginary high horse.

if you can't bring yourself to date someone you don't find attractive why should others have to do it?

I don't get how you condemn other's preferences while having your own. or is it cause you consider yourself a different ethnicity than them. and don't feel good that some people would chose to not date you based on that. well it hurts seeing you wouldn't date people like me cause you consider us non intellectual.

I am open and accepting that people think and feel differently and find themselves attractive to different types of people so unless they are like man that woman is hot and attractive as hell, too bad shes ____ I don't date them. then its not racist.

reality is most everyone has preferences of some kind. either they are all wrong or all are ok. you can't pick the ones that bother you and keep your own. same reason why women who find me ugly shouldn't have to date me.


I'll probably get rocks thrown at me for this*, but I like some of the things Sly said here.

Image

And I don't think all preferences are conscious. All I know is that I've only been seriously attracted to dorky (adorkable) guys of a certain race. Maybe that will change. I used to be absolutely obsessed with blue eyes, and I thought that was my main preference. That all disappeared when I met [insert crush's name here].

And I've never looked at a guy and thought, "He's [insert any race], so I'm not attracted to him."

*I needed an opportunity to use this picture again.


what bothers me is not that she disagrees with people's preferences but that she chooses to attack them by calling them stuff or saying they are just full of s**t and lying. until she can become then she won't ever be able to understand how their mind works. so she thinks I don't think that way so everyone else doesn't either.

preferences are preferences unless you turn to hatred towards a group of people. not being attracted to certain race isn't racism. it isn't wrong and people shouldn't be called names or made to fell like s**t any more then one should insult someone in a wheel chair for not walking.


And I disagree with that. Your assumptions are also way off charts ("she thinks... yadayadayada"). I don't think the way you do about this issue. I don't feel like convincing anyone (why would I want that), but I will give my opnion on this topic. Simple as that :)



The_Face_of_Boo
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26 Nov 2014, 8:41 am

AngelRho wrote:
Boo: A lot of black men are single, too, though. There's a whole history behind why that is, and it's more or less directly tied to the history of our welfare system. It's not about discrimination but rather an "unintended consequence" of how discrimination was poorly handled.

Housing projects were started during the Great Depression to handle the influx of homeless people. Back then there were probably more whites than blacks living there. Between FDR's alphabet soup programs and WWII, most whites got jobs and started moving out the suburbs--and "white flight" continues to be a constant headache for underprivileged school districts, I might add. For various reasons, partially due to civil rights problems, blacks were left behind in these urban projects.

Eligibility for cheap projects and welfare benefits required that the occupants be single mothers. For a while, black families stayed together. What happened was social workers would start making the rounds, and if they found a man living there they'd kick the whole family out. So they had to watch out for social workers and the man would either have to hide or head out the fire escape. Over time, they went from the husband having to make other sleeping arrangements to the husband being absent entirely. Eventually they just stopped bothering with even getting married.

Fast forward a few decades.

A subset of the black population has become enslaved to a system that was never meant to be a permanent solution. There are women who grow up thinking their job is to have babies, and they are taught at an early age and are either encouraged to become sexually active early or they are victims of sexual abuse. It's a public secret…a lot of times the fathers are uncles or cousins. Nobody talks about it because they don't want family getting arrested. They are also taught that if they go to college and focus on career ahead of having more babies for an aunt or grandmother to take care of that they are traitors, and it's not uncommon for their families to disown them for that.

It has created a unique sub-culture, the worst examples of which are glorified in the media. Just watch the Maury show. He always starts his show with something that starts out mildly scandalous but relatively innocuous, like "I'm 19 married to a 47 year old." This quickly gets derailed when he does a "reveal" and shows her husband is not the father of their baby. That's usually the opening white trailer trash segment, and it just disintegrates from there. The rest of the show is a bunch of black women screaming at each other. Seriously, you could make a drinking game out of "she got his nose! He de daddy!" when they show photos of the baby. Double-shots every time he's NOT the daddy.

Granted, most of this is just acting for the camera. I get that. I'm aware they're picking the worst of the worst for the show and probably even coach them a little bit ahead of time. But I'm also aware that for a lot of these drama-mamas this is every-day life. I've witnessed it first hand. When I was still teaching in public school I once had a teen mom AND her baby-daddy take my music appreciation class. They got in a fight, dropped a few f-bombs, and the rest of the class started chanting "Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!" (i.e. Jerry Springer Show). I mean, complete with her saying "You ain't no daddy, you just a sperm donor."

You want to know why so many black women are single? Look "how dey ack" and it won't take long for you to figure it out.



They should bring to the show a toddler screaming "Not the momma!" :lol:



CynicalWaffle
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26 Nov 2014, 10:44 am

AngelRho wrote:
Boo: A lot of black men are single, too, though. There's a whole history behind why that is, and it's more or less directly tied to the history of our welfare system. It's not about discrimination but rather an "unintended consequence" of how discrimination was poorly handled.

Housing projects were started during the Great Depression to handle the influx of homeless people. Back then there were probably more whites than blacks living there. Between FDR's alphabet soup programs and WWII, most whites got jobs and started moving out the suburbs--and "white flight" continues to be a constant headache for underprivileged school districts, I might add. For various reasons, partially due to civil rights problems, blacks were left behind in these urban projects.

Eligibility for cheap projects and welfare benefits required that the occupants be single mothers. For a while, black families stayed together. What happened was social workers would start making the rounds, and if they found a man living there they'd kick the whole family out. So they had to watch out for social workers and the man would either have to hide or head out the fire escape. Over time, they went from the husband having to make other sleeping arrangements to the husband being absent entirely. Eventually they just stopped bothering with even getting married.

Fast forward a few decades.

A subset of the black population has become enslaved to a system that was never meant to be a permanent solution. There are women who grow up thinking their job is to have babies, and they are taught at an early age and are either encouraged to become sexually active early or they are victims of sexual abuse. It's a public secret…a lot of times the fathers are uncles or cousins. Nobody talks about it because they don't want family getting arrested. They are also taught that if they go to college and focus on career ahead of having more babies for an aunt or grandmother to take care of that they are traitors, and it's not uncommon for their families to disown them for that.

It has created a unique sub-culture, the worst examples of which are glorified in the media. Just watch the Maury show. He always starts his show with something that starts out mildly scandalous but relatively innocuous, like "I'm 19 married to a 47 year old." This quickly gets derailed when he does a "reveal" and shows her husband is not the father of their baby. That's usually the opening white trailer trash segment, and it just disintegrates from there. The rest of the show is a bunch of black women screaming at each other. Seriously, you could make a drinking game out of "she got his nose! He de daddy!" when they show photos of the baby. Double-shots every time he's NOT the daddy.

Granted, most of this is just acting for the camera. I get that. I'm aware they're picking the worst of the worst for the show and probably even coach them a little bit ahead of time. But I'm also aware that for a lot of these drama-mamas this is every-day life. I've witnessed it first hand. When I was still teaching in public school I once had a teen mom AND her baby-daddy take my music appreciation class. They got in a fight, dropped a few f-bombs, and the rest of the class started chanting "Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!" (i.e. Jerry Springer Show). I mean, complete with her saying "You ain't no daddy, you just a sperm donor."

You want to know why so many black women are single? Look "how dey ack" and it won't take long for you to figure it out.


Yeah, I hate to say it, but AngelRho is right in this particular case.

And a lot of black men are single, too, especially if they don't act out the stereotypes associated with being black. Black women won't touch non-thug black men with a 10-foot pole, and most black men feel the same about black women. That's just how it is.



kraftiekortie
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26 Nov 2014, 11:19 am

I'm an exception to this rule.

My wife is a black Trinidadian. I'm pretty much a Caucasian nerd.



Booyakasha
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26 Nov 2014, 4:06 pm

sly279 wrote:
Cafeaulait wrote:
sly279 wrote:
Cafeaulait wrote:
Agreed with Boo. One of the most intelligent posts so far. Didn't know Boo had that much intellectual capacities.
And it has nothing to do with 'natural'. I don't have a preference and there is nothing 'unnatural' about that.


um you have said a few times you have a preference for intellectual/intelligent attractive men.
same as others preferences so sit on your imaginary high horse.

if you can't bring yourself to date someone you don't find attractive why should others have to do it?

I don't get how you condemn other's preferences while having your own. or is it cause you consider yourself a different ethnicity than them. and don't feel good that some people would chose to not date you based on that. well it hurts seeing you wouldn't date people like me cause you consider us non intellectual.

I am open and accepting that people think and feel differently and find themselves attractive to different types of people so unless they are like man that woman is hot and attractive as hell, too bad shes ____ I don't date them. then its not racist.

reality is most everyone has preferences of some kind. either they are all wrong or all are ok. you can't pick the ones that bother you and keep your own. same reason why women who find me ugly shouldn't have to date me.


This post is filled with assumptions that you label as facts. I Do Not agree with you. I even find your line of reasoning so simplistic and on surface that it takes away my energy to analytically respond to your 'arguments'. I would type way to much as a response to something of very little intellectual value (to me, at least). Same as with other users here. Also your repeated one-liners which come down to 'why can't people date who they are attracted to' make no impression with me. To me it has nothing to do with 'not being allowed'. People can do what they want, and they will.

Goodbye, Sly.


whatever be a hypocrite like many others just leave me and others alone.
thanks for saying talking to me is very little intellectual value. it seems you aren't the person I thought you were in which case don't want to take to someone who is so judgemental

its so funny that those people who complain about people being judgmental are often themselves judgmental.
why can't you just be like thats not my preference but live in let live. instead you call them dumb or liars or whatever mean thing you want.

I don't smoke, but I don't hate on smokers, i don't get abortions but i support others doing it. I don't like xbox but I don't troll xbox owners. I'd rather be kind and open minded than what you consider intelligent.


Could we tone it down a bit please?



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27 Nov 2014, 12:24 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Let me ask a question: If a perfect match in personality/interest/culturally-wise and even physically attractive to you in almost everywhere (shape-wise, face wtv..etc) asks you out, but turns out she's of a non-favorite race for you - would you reject her just because she's of that race?


You seem to be missing the point there, everyone here who's expressed a racial preference has couched it explicitly in aesthetic terms, making your hypothetical contradictory. Really, the question is 'would you date someone who is otherwise perfect for you but not attractive to you', people are just making a big deal out of it because it's a race thing.


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sly279
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27 Nov 2014, 3:15 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
sly279 wrote:
geometrictunneling wrote:
Acknowledging the idea of race in any context is racism.

So let's just stop talking


so when theres a gentical increase chance of a disorder/health risk and the doctor brings it up they are racist?
what about the stats where it shows crime is higher for some races?
is the employment discrimination act racist?

"prejudice, discrimination, or antagonism directed against someone of a different race based on the belief that one's own race is superior."

so it's only if you think you are better then them based on their race.
so I don't see how not being attracted to a race based on experience(ie looking at them) is racism. and its not directed at them either as its just about who the person dates or doesn't date and not attacking the rejectee


The higher crime rate in certain groups is often caused by a disadvantageous social/economical history (which is often caused by a history of racism) for that group.


Let me ask a question: If a perfect match in personality/interest/culturally-wise and even physically attractive to you in almost everywhere (shape-wise, face wtv..etc) asks you out, but turns out she's of a non-favorite race for you - would you reject her just because she's of that race?


As I stated I am not attracted to most ____ but if I was attracted then it wouldn't be a problem. I don't get why it has to be turned into a (your racist) seems everything is turned into racism now a days. >.> that or sexism.



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27 Nov 2014, 3:19 am

Cafeaulait wrote:
sly279 wrote:
ReticentJaeger wrote:
sly279 wrote:
Cafeaulait wrote:
Agreed with Boo. One of the most intelligent posts so far. Didn't know Boo had that much intellectual capacities.
And it has nothing to do with 'natural'. I don't have a preference and there is nothing 'unnatural' about that.


um you have said a few times you have a preference for intellectual/intelligent attractive men.
same as others preferences so sit on your imaginary high horse.

if you can't bring yourself to date someone you don't find attractive why should others have to do it?

I don't get how you condemn other's preferences while having your own. or is it cause you consider yourself a different ethnicity than them. and don't feel good that some people would chose to not date you based on that. well it hurts seeing you wouldn't date people like me cause you consider us non intellectual.

I am open and accepting that people think and feel differently and find themselves attractive to different types of people so unless they are like man that woman is hot and attractive as hell, too bad shes ____ I don't date them. then its not racist.

reality is most everyone has preferences of some kind. either they are all wrong or all are ok. you can't pick the ones that bother you and keep your own. same reason why women who find me ugly shouldn't have to date me.


I'll probably get rocks thrown at me for this*, but I like some of the things Sly said here.

Image

And I don't think all preferences are conscious. All I know is that I've only been seriously attracted to dorky (adorkable) guys of a certain race. Maybe that will change. I used to be absolutely obsessed with blue eyes, and I thought that was my main preference. That all disappeared when I met [insert crush's name here].

And I've never looked at a guy and thought, "He's [insert any race], so I'm not attracted to him."

*I needed an opportunity to use this picture again.


what bothers me is not that she disagrees with people's preferences but that she chooses to attack them by calling them stuff or saying they are just full of s**t and lying. until she can become then she won't ever be able to understand how their mind works. so she thinks I don't think that way so everyone else doesn't either.

preferences are preferences unless you turn to hatred towards a group of people. not being attracted to certain race isn't racism. it isn't wrong and people shouldn't be called names or made to fell like s**t any more then one should insult someone in a wheel chair for not walking.


And I disagree with that. Your assumptions are also way off charts ("she thinks... yadayadayada"). I don't think the way you do about this issue. I don't feel like convincing anyone (why would I want that), but I will give my opnion on this topic. Simple as that :)


I've seen you post about how you prefer men who are on the same intellectual level of you and can be reflective in the past.

you could have said "I disagree" instead you called liars and said our opinion is BS.
one way is respectfully disagreeing other is insulting people for having a different view.



sly279
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27 Nov 2014, 3:20 am

Booyakasha wrote:
sly279 wrote:
Cafeaulait wrote:
sly279 wrote:
Cafeaulait wrote:
Agreed with Boo. One of the most intelligent posts so far. Didn't know Boo had that much intellectual capacities.
And it has nothing to do with 'natural'. I don't have a preference and there is nothing 'unnatural' about that.


um you have said a few times you have a preference for intellectual/intelligent attractive men.
same as others preferences so sit on your imaginary high horse.

if you can't bring yourself to date someone you don't find attractive why should others have to do it?

I don't get how you condemn other's preferences while having your own. or is it cause you consider yourself a different ethnicity than them. and don't feel good that some people would chose to not date you based on that. well it hurts seeing you wouldn't date people like me cause you consider us non intellectual.

I am open and accepting that people think and feel differently and find themselves attractive to different types of people so unless they are like man that woman is hot and attractive as hell, too bad shes ____ I don't date them. then its not racist.

reality is most everyone has preferences of some kind. either they are all wrong or all are ok. you can't pick the ones that bother you and keep your own. same reason why women who find me ugly shouldn't have to date me.


This post is filled with assumptions that you label as facts. I Do Not agree with you. I even find your line of reasoning so simplistic and on surface that it takes away my energy to analytically respond to your 'arguments'. I would type way to much as a response to something of very little intellectual value (to me, at least). Same as with other users here. Also your repeated one-liners which come down to 'why can't people date who they are attracted to' make no impression with me. To me it has nothing to do with 'not being allowed'. People can do what they want, and they will.

Goodbye, Sly.


whatever be a hypocrite like many others just leave me and others alone.
thanks for saying talking to me is very little intellectual value. it seems you aren't the person I thought you were in which case don't want to take to someone who is so judgemental

its so funny that those people who complain about people being judgmental are often themselves judgmental.
why can't you just be like thats not my preference but live in let live. instead you call them dumb or liars or whatever mean thing you want.

I don't smoke, but I don't hate on smokers, i don't get abortions but i support others doing it. I don't like xbox but I don't troll xbox owners. I'd rather be kind and open minded than what you consider intelligent.


Could we tone it down a bit please?


shes's got me upset I don't like being called a liar, who's unchangeable way of attraction is bulshit or leaning towards racism. :'(



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27 Nov 2014, 3:44 am

No problem, now let's please return to the subject of the thread.



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28 Nov 2014, 9:56 am

What’s the point in condemning people with racial preferences for dating anyway? Even if you could shame or threaten them all into silence, which you can’t, they’d just keep choosing their dates the same way, without ever mentioning race is a factor. Or are they going to be forced to date someone of a different race?


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