Ex and Aspies

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Hello everyone.

I am new here and is a bit at a lost. I thought I can post my issue on here as Ive always been the type to never post anything personal online. Help from an AS man or females with past or similar experiences is much needed!

I have been dating an AS man for almost a year now and I have to say, it has been the most stressful relationship I've ever endured. My question is how long does it take for an aspie man to let go of his past. My boyfriend was dating this girl who had a kid by someone else and she was involved at the time. He knew about it but still both were able to keep a long distant emotional affair since they lived in two different states. They have used video chatting/emails/yahoo text and other forms of online mediums to keep the affair afloat-secretly of course! They saw each other a handful of time in the course of several years till the last year of their relationships, he decided to move to her state so they can be together finally. He sacrificed all his savings and assets for the move. After living in the same state for about 10 months, his ex still was living with her long time boyfriend and never got the courage to end her relationship to be with my AS boyfriend. Fast forward 10 month, my boyfriend decided to move back home and broken hearted. He explained to me that his ex was suppose to be faithful to him during the time they lived in the same state but she never was as he found out via spying on her. He was never able to pick up on the lies and deception since he has Asperger's. I've tried to help him forgive but it has been almost 4 years since they have broken up althought they have made several attempt to get back together but the trust was destroyed. She was his first and I feel he is missing out on life not only with me but potential ex and future mate. He is very bitter!

What should I do? and please excuse my grammar as English is a second Language for me.

I have a feeling he thinks there is hope between the two of them it's just because of his ex having a child with her husband. They have tried without my knowledge until some months passed, that they have tried to make each other jealous by using me and her beau pic via social media. It even went as far as her using pics with sexual anuiedos to make each other jealous. I've tried to confront him but denies everything. Please help not sure how to handle this 'curse' let along trying to understand and except his Asperger disorder. Not sure if it's all a illusion and obsession , I think!

Thank you all

Trust me, I've been studying technology for nearly half my entire life; you need to deactivate or delete your Facebook. I know, I know, this is my cookie cutter response, but the people you're writing about are by no means the only ones playing havoc with your mind.

The scale of deception you're thinking about is a drop in an ocean. There's a quiet war going on for control of your entire life, you are experiencing side effects.

NoFakeInternet [link]

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

Interesting. Sounds like either the two are just immature and only care about themselves, or the two are immature and he is the naive one who might care but is playing into her stupid little games. Either way, it sounds like you would benefit by getting away from this person and the situation altogether.

I will say that it can be tough dealing with fallouts from exes for anyone. But I have had the habit of simply cutting a person out of my life after a breakup (initially), especially if I know I cannot trust them. The ones i cannot trust will likely never get close enough to me again. I do know as well that as humans, we often have trouble distinguishing differences between forgiving someone and trusting them.