Would you date someone you didn't want to marry?

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Would you date someone you didn't want to marry?
Yes 66%  66%  [ 33 ]
No 34%  34%  [ 17 ]
Total votes : 50

Non_Passerine
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24 Jan 2016, 6:19 pm

Would you?



Fnord
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24 Jan 2016, 6:22 pm

I have dated women specifically to determine if I wanted to marry them or not. After a few dates, it became apparent that they were not the kind of women that I wanted to be married to. Then I dated the woman who is now my wife.

For me, dating was a selection process. Sort of like interviewing job candidates until one of them stands out from the rest.


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yellowtamarin
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24 Jan 2016, 6:51 pm

Well that's everybody, so, yeah :D

But would I date somebody I knew I couldn't be in a long-term relationship with? No, not at this stage of my life. In my early 20s, sure, as I didn't really think about the future so much, or know what I wanted/needed in a partner.



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24 Jan 2016, 7:04 pm

If I knew I didn't want to marry them, then I would only date them if they felt the same way I did (i.e. they didn't want to marry me, had the same feelings and outlook for/about our relationship).


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TheSpectrum
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24 Jan 2016, 7:15 pm

Depends how I'm feeling at that point in time.


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24 Jan 2016, 7:54 pm

I voted 'yes'. I think in part it's a process of discovery - I would obviously be interested in them, but would want to see what they were like, how well we worked together.

It also helps in finding things out about oneself.

That said, I'm not entirely sure what 'dating' is - in my mind it can cover quite a range of seriousness. I don't know when it turns from 'dating' into a more serious thing. I don't know if I've ever 'dated', but rather just found myself in a relationship.


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24 Jan 2016, 10:02 pm

Yes, why do you think people rent movies they have not seen before deciding to buy them?


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25 Jan 2016, 1:26 am

Yes I would. I believed that I would fall in love with most anyone if we both tried to make a relationship work with each other. I would grow to love them


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25 Jan 2016, 1:44 am

Dating someone you don't want to marry - or even a number of someones you don't want to marry, over time - is a pretty practical way to find out exactly what kind of person you *do* want to marry.


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25 Jan 2016, 1:53 am

I don't know. I'd have to know what kind of person I'd want to date first and who would even date me.



Adam_K93
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25 Jan 2016, 9:47 am

To hell with getting married. So, no. I don't want to date anyone.


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Zaye
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25 Jan 2016, 12:25 pm

I tried dating a few times, usually I let it go for a month or two until I can figure out if I feel as though I'd want to be more serious with the person.

I am thrown off by the concept of dating though. People know it is a date so they sometimes try too hard to be someone who wants to impress you. This makes it harder to see the person's true colors. I always liked being friends, and am bothered by people who fret over the concept of friend zone. Sometimes people may not feel a certain way until after knowing someone for a long time.

I can usually tell after a month or two though if the person is right for me long-term.

Marriage for me is a gray area. Not because I don't believe you can find someone who you love enough to marry, but because I dislike the legality behind it. Way to make you resent someone you loved so much when money is an important equation. -_-


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25 Jan 2016, 2:29 pm

I would date someone up and until the point I saw no future in the relationship. To let it continue past that point would be setting either party up for disappointment/hurt. I imagine a fling would be different, but I've never had one, and I'm not sure it would be right for me anyways.



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25 Jan 2016, 5:17 pm

Yup, when I was younger. Like, under 25. I was looking for a good time because I was still in college.



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26 Jan 2016, 3:01 pm

Well, it depends. If there was something about them that i knew I would never be able to live with then I would not go out with them.

But if I was asked out of the blue by someone I hadn't considered before and there were no red flags I'd say yes to get to know them better. If it we didn't work together I'd just be honest and tell them and discontinue the relationship. But you never know, they might be lovely and we get on like a house on fire.

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26 Jan 2016, 3:18 pm

Nope. Now it they had something that I was attracted to such as a great personality or the same beliefs, then I would because I might end up falling in love with them and then want to marry them. If I knew there just was no way I would ever want to marry them, then NO, I wouldn't keep dating them. It would be wasting both of our times. I might remain friends if they wanted that and do fun things together, but nothing more.


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