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CarDoge
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Joined: 5 Apr 2016
Age: 26
Gender: Male
Posts: 18
Location: How am I suppose to know

02 May 2016, 11:19 pm

I really hate when I need help with crap like this, but it's been bothering me for a week. So here goes the spew;

I dated a girl for a few months, really cool, incredibly cute, and funny. Said she had a lot of guy friends and said guys left her for it. I didn't think it was a problem, of course I saw the full truth. She didn't tell them to stop (a couple were incredibly creepy and persistent, and was about to knock the lights out of obe until I just interrupted, pulled her away, and talked to her later. She seemed to be perfectly okay with these guys making sexual advances on her so I didn't even break up with her, I just plainly broke all contact like usual with this kind of garbage, she made no effort to communicate back, and that was that. That was a year and a half ago. I went and hung out with the friend that hooked me up with her and got us dating in the first place, she said "oh yeah, she says hi" which I found weird, but not as weird as "she asks about you a lot, basically whenever we hang out" and "she doesn't know why you stopped talking to her" even though I thought I made it pretty clear the idea of her moving in with her three friends who owned a house wanted her to move in was not a thing I was too psyched on. Wouldn't have be a problem seeing two of them were in a relationship and I thought were pretty cool. No, the fact the third person was one of the guys that made a handful of sexual advances toward her lived there too. I think my friend is hinting that I should talk to her and that she really genuinely doesn't know why. Maybe she is 100% blind to this, or is completely aware. Even with all this, I still have a slight belief in second chances. Should I try talking to her again and see what happens or just leave it and not waste the energy? Pretty sure she's the only other girl I've met that actually got to me and understood me which is quite a feat in itself seeing every other one ends up thinking I'm a huge a**hole after a week for hell if I know why (honestly There's a good chance I am I wouldn't be surprised). Any advice and opinions are appreciated.



Chichikov
Veteran
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Joined: 27 Mar 2016
Age: 46
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,151
Location: UK

03 May 2016, 4:16 am

If her behaviour and her relationships with the people in her life bothered you so much you broke all contact, why will a second chance be any different? Why will something no longer bother you that really bothered you in the past?

Seeing only the good in an old relationship and deciding to give it a second chance is very common, hell I've even done it myself. Does it work out second time around? Only if there have been substantial changes, either in you or her.



CarDoge
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

Joined: 5 Apr 2016
Age: 26
Gender: Male
Posts: 18
Location: How am I suppose to know

03 May 2016, 8:29 pm

Yeah that's basically my thought. I don't know, I guess I'm just hoping there was a change. That's probably a lot to hope for though in this case. Hah