Re joined dating websites
I hope you don't take this the wrong way but your messages here can come across as a bit pompous and condescending. I'm sure you don't intend that but I see how someone might think you are talking down to them. It's irrelevant anyway because in general, online dating is a cesspool, particularly the free sites.
Are you talking to me? If so that is really upsetting to be honest :'( :'( :'( :'(
All I want to do is help
Well it is ok to have preferences, still I don't think he woudn't date a woman who drinks a bit or had some boyfriends before.
What makes him look bad is that he seems to look down on people and talks like girls owe him something.
Also sometimes he sounds a bit like he is perfect for them and they are stupid to realize it. If someone doesn't have romantic feelings for him, they just don't, it's not about being perfect (which he doesn't seem to be anyway).
All I want to do is help
No, I've had no issues with you and enjoy your posts. I was referring to EcoMatt.
I'm not trying to be rude at all but I can clearly see how this attitude turns people off. I personally find it rather off putting especially when terms like "roadblocking" and "suppressed" are thrown aroun. Talk about overdramatic! I appreciate you are rather intelligent but there is a different between showing your intelligence and showing off and looking down on other's choices. I've been guilty of this in the past (like my stance on tattoos) so I'm not trying to be personal with my criticism.
As I told people here, I would be considered about the top 10% of OKCupid in my area (it might sound arrogant but I have seen the other profiles), have an athletic build, am taller that 99% of men and I could barely got any attention. I had three first dates and one psychotic relationship. That's it in three years. One flaked after I let it slip I was inexperienced and you know what? (Let someone else) f**k her! She did me a huge favor by getting lost. It almost feels like you are viewing women as objects and that would turn anyone off, male or female.
All I want to do is help
No, I've had no issues with you and enjoy your posts. I was referring to EcoMatt.
I'm not trying to be rude at all but I can clearly see how this attitude turns people off. I personally find it rather off putting especially when terms like "roadblocking" and "suppressed" are thrown aroun. Talk about overdramatic! I appreciate you are rather intelligent but there is a different between showing your intelligence and showing off and looking down on other's choices. I've been guilty of this in the past (like my stance on tattoos) so I'm not trying to be personal with my criticism.
As I told people here, I would be considered about the top 10% of OKCupid in my area (it might sound arrogant but I have seen the other profiles), have an athletic build, am taller that 99% of men and I could barely got any attention. I had three first dates and one psychotic relationship. That's it in three years. One flaked after I let it slip I was inexperienced and you know what? (Let someone else) f**k her! She did me a huge favor by getting lost. It almost feels like you are viewing women as objects and that would turn anyone off, male or female.
Oh I I see sorry for the misunderstanding
Excuse me?
That how people judge me where none of them haven't met me. Taking these words online, or in text are not serious. Its a bloody internet, that took over the world by controlling people's lives. I can sense of tall poppy and narcissistic issue when comes approach to people who struggle coping life. Biggest play in my life, as a young disabled person in Australia is unemployment and never had a relationship. Its because of stigma. This is where and how people judge by its cover of 'different', 'unique', 'diverse' and 'other' kinds of people. 25% of young people in Australia are unemployed (age between 18 and 30). Spain at 57%, UK at 28%..............etc. Its about stigma.
It is a same for someone who have a dating profile online who never had a relationship, and you are older person who is committed for long term relationship. I was giving a go to try find someone online for long term or life long partnership. So what I have observed lots and lots of 'judging by its cover'. Women on dating websites follow guys to fool them, in terms of trick and mistreatment. This is a huge issue in young females who are trying to find themselves out or even trying to find something to do. This happens to be called as rebound relationships where it is inconsistent.
So you saying my attitude is a turn off for all women, hence why I never got a date yet? Well, its because it how I am being seen by them. They kept sticking to wrong guys. My grandparents told me all about it before they died when I was 18. They turn out true and were being honest about this. They said do not use online thing. Again, this was said by my female aspie friend here in my city as well. Avoid online assumptions and judgmental covers.
So I have female friends in reality, like with the Greens party where there are a lot of young demographics. I had a great chat with these kind of people last night, and potentially today and rest of next week. I find more easy to get to have a conversation in reality than making one online or trying to plan to get together via online.
I believe, like what my female aspie friend said, that reading and writing in text especially online is not a true assumption of what we all naturally converse in reality. Humans are designed to speak and listen.
I don't know about that. I have lots of issues with aspie girls. Their attitudes were so incredibly ruder than NT girls to me. Anyhow, majority of them are lesbians in my city.
This happens to that I have lots of NT friends, its because they are more open.
I don't know about that. I have lots of issues with aspie girls. Their attitudes were so incredibly ruder than NT girls to me. Anyhow, majority of them are lesbians in my city.
This happens to that I have lots of NT friends, its because they are more open.
Yes, which is exactly what I claimed. You are trying to get into a relationship with NT-types, and you believe NDs are diagnosed AS or autism.
Also, there is no relation between LGBT and being neurodiverse, so the sample of aspie girls you know is biased. Which, again, is related to which girls you classify as Aspie (diagnosed?) and which you classify as NT. With that kind of definition / "aspie radar", you simply won't be able to find compatible girls. Other than by pure chance.
I believe, like what my female aspie friend said, that reading and writing in text especially online is not a true assumption of what we all naturally converse in reality. Humans are designed to speak and listen.
See, you proved my point.
I never made any such claims, only that your online communication comes across as pompous (as does your reply to me). I wonder if you even read anything I wrote because I make it clear I had far less success than you. I also never said that is the reason for your lack of success but it certainly doesn't help. If you don't want to listen that's your business but I think I can speak with authority: when I joined WP I never even held hands with a female!
Your main problem in my opinion is that you are using free sites to begin with. However, that doesn't take back anything I said about how you continue to come across. Do you have a sample of a message that you have sent? I could be completely wrong and they could be fantastic but I can only judge based on what I see.
After approximately 4 weeks since joining "Plenty of Fish", I have reached the conclusion that, with my circumstances as they are, I am undateable. Realistically I believe my only chance would be with someone else on the spectrum as I am simply too dissimilar to the vast majority of neurotypicals. My disinclination towards drinking certainly doesn't boost my prospects in this regard.
Does anyone know of any GOOD dating sites for those with a spectrum disorder?
_________________
"Every day, once a day, give yourself a present. Don't plan it, don't wait for it, just let it happen. " - Special Agent Dale Cooper, Twin Peaks
I hardly think any exist, or could exist. The ND courtship doesn't work online, primarily because you can only communicate verbally (although it is possible to use it as a complement using monologues or making hints with links and pictures).
Still, to be able to start something IRL, you need a decent "aspie radar".
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