Are most men struggling to get healthy weight women?

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At times like these for autistic men and women, I just can't fathom how bad it must sting when karma bites. If anything that makes me upset is constantly being told live and learn by my own peers, family, and friends, and all I ever wanted was to actually make them smile and laugh, and learn something new and unique, but instead garbage infests my life and the people who gave garbage to my peers, family, and friends is what I'm irritated the most about.

I don't wish for the most beautiful girlfriend on the planet, but rather someone who just is an honest girlfriend, and the milennials like myself made honesty something to be frowned upon.

You should stop talking about "healthy weight". The bottom of the mortality curve is a BMI over 25. Weight isn't a big predictor until you get into the morbid ranges, 35+, and even then it's highly dependent on the individual.

If you're selecting for long term mortality, would you reject a woman if she had a history of breast cancer in the family? That's probably more significant than any BMI under 40.

Why not be rational and self-aware and say it like it is? You're picky and not attracted to a lot of women. Most men prioritize physical appearance and prefer thin women and it's not symmetrical statistically. (I.e. being slim and fit vs slightly overweight doesn't matter much for adult men.) It sounds like you're attracted to a subset of women who get attention from men more desirable to them than we are. And you're not attracted to the subset who don't get much attention from men. I have the same issue.

I'm having a similar issue trying to find men to date who aren't at either end of the 'spectrum' (i.e. either overweight OR muscled gym bunnies). I just want a lean, healthy guy who has a similar lifestyle to me. I can't stand junk food or sugar in the house and I like to stay active, so I don't think it's too weird to find guys who appear to follow that sort of routine more attractive. I have dated overweight guys and I've dated very muscley guys and couldn't force myself to be attracted to either. What you like it what you like. So I don't understand the shaming that some guys get when they say they want a slim girlfriend/wife. It's pretty natural to want a healthy mate. Yes, some people go for specific types outside of what the mainstream considers 'attractive' and that's totally fine. Men who say they love 'BBWs' or 'extra curvy' women generally get praised, whereas there is a clear double standard these days for men who say they prefer slim/toned women. I find it very odd.

And yeah, as some people have pointed out, two thirds of the population (if not more) in western countries like the USA or UK are now either overweight or obese. So those of us who stay a healthy weight are slowly becoming unicorns in society and our preferences seem to be considered increasingly socially taboo.

I don't know about neurotypicals but it sounds like most aspies are struggling to find a healthy weight partner.

My current girlfriend & my 2nd are pretty big but weight was not a factor for me when trying to find a girlfriend. I mostly just wanted someone who would give me a real chance & actually try to make a relationship work with me. I have alot of physical & mental disabilities & was single & looking for a long time so I wasn't too picky with what I wanted in a partner. I was about a normal wight when I got in all 3 relationships but I'm fat now because I started eating 3 meals a day due to the meds & supplements I'm on & I also binge eat. I used to eat one meal a day & pig out but now I eat 3 meals a day & pig out for at least one of em & also pig out on snacks. It also doesn't help that my girlfriend snacks because of depression which makes me want to snack too & I cant control myself when I start. The binging could be related to side-effects of meds I'm on but I'm not sure. I really need to start exercising again but I'm not binging quite as much now.