hurtloam wrote:
Closet Genious wrote:
hurtloam wrote:
magz wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
It is a simple question magz: yes or no.
Sorry, the answer is conditional.
Yes if I perceived unemployment as temporary
No if I perceived unemployment as permanent.
I agree the answer is conditional. It's not black and white.
If it's a permenant situation, what is the reason? Is the man seriously ill? Is he a lazy layabout who watches tv all day? Is he not intelligent?
If it's temporary, what is the reason? Has he just been made redundant? Is he too arrogant to do a menial job in the interim whilst he looks for a job he wants? Has he been unemployed for a short time or a long time and why?
I'd expect a man to ask the same questions about me if I was unemployed. Thankfully I've only been unemployed for one day in the past 10 years. As someone who managed to land on their feet a lot and find work I won't have as much sympathy for someone who can't find a job. There's got to be some big reason for him not being able to work? Will that be a liability?
Anyway, my point was, just having a good job isn't enough. Even if one has a good job other factors come into the equation.
And why is it always all or nothing with you guys? Do I want a man with no job or a musician millionaire? Um, neither, I just want someone in the middle like me.
I was only going to an extreme to disprove your theory. That social skills were "the most important" thing.
Ah I misunderstood because I didn't actually say that. So I didn't realise what point you were trying to make.
The thing is there's guys on here who are constantly saying woe is me, my job isn't good enough. Now I understand they have circumstances where what they are doing now is as much as they can do.
I'm trying to phrase this in the most constructive way possible. But even with a good job, there would still be work to do. It's not a magic panacea. I don't think these guys are comparing themselves to famous musicians, just guys with full time jobs, earning a living way and owning a car and having their own apartment. That's the level I'm on.
I don't see the point of finding a target and constantly moaning about that one thing, when it's not that one thing that is the issue.
Although it's probably worse to accept that there is a cluster of problems not just one problem.
No worries. When it comes to being attractive, we are the sum of our parts, but I don't think we have to be good at everything. A socially akward guy, would be better off focusing on his strengths, like maybe putting his intellect to use in whatever way he can.
The john mayer comparison is actually the opposite of whining. It's the circumstances he has created for himself, that gives him the opportunites he has now. All else being equal, if I had his success, and he worked at walmart, I would get alot more female attention than him. Or if he had spent time working on his social skills, instead of playing guitar. So it's not that I'm inherently bad, and he is good, he's just in a much better situation than me in regards to attracting women, but he still has the same weaknesses socially as I do.
This kind of goes back to self improvement. When we see threads on WP like "how do I get a girlfriend", the question should really be "how do I improve myself" instead. because it's actually same question. If I wanted a girlfriend, it's only a matter of changing the variables that will give you most bang for your buck, which I am kind of doing now anyway. That's why even though I sometimes seem a bit angry here, I never whine, because I don't think the world is evil against me, I understand how the world works(pretentious I know). I just get a bit annoyed with how the world works sometimes.
16 Oct 2017, 11:41 am
