How common are female aspies who haven't dated yet?

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hurtloam
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16 Aug 2018, 4:02 am

There are definitely types of people though. Maybe don't look for "aspies" as they will be hard to find. Just don't try and go for the ultra dolled up girls who want a house full of things from (what's the American equivalent of Next?) And who wants a flash car and money for expensive hair and nails.

There's plenty of more down to earth women who don't care about outward showiness. They are not so "in-your-face" and are harder to spot.

It's like I won't chase after guys who drive BMWs and who are obsessed with soccer and beer. Unless it's artisanal beer ;) there would be no point. They and I are not at all alike or liable to be attracted to each other's personalities.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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16 Aug 2018, 8:09 am

hurtloam wrote:
There are definitely types of people though. Maybe don't look for "aspies" as they will be hard to find. Just don't try and go for the ultra dolled up girls who want a house full of things from (what's the American equivalent of Next?) And who wants a flash car and money for expensive hair and nails.

There's plenty of more down to earth women who don't care about outward showiness. They are not so "in-your-face" and are harder to spot.

It's like I won't chase after guys who drive BMWs and who are obsessed with soccer and beer. Unless it's artisanal beer ;) there would be no point. They and I are not at all alike or liable to be attracted to each other's personalities.


Surely I am not saying that dolled up girls are the only alternative to aspie women.



hurtloam
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16 Aug 2018, 8:31 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
hurtloam wrote:
There are definitely types of people though. Maybe don't look for "aspies" as they will be hard to find. Just don't try and go for the ultra dolled up girls who want a house full of things from (what's the American equivalent of Next?) And who wants a flash car and money for expensive hair and nails.

There's plenty of more down to earth women who don't care about outward showiness. They are not so "in-your-face" and are harder to spot.

It's like I won't chase after guys who drive BMWs and who are obsessed with soccer and beer. Unless it's artisanal beer ;) there would be no point. They and I are not at all alike or liable to be attracted to each other's personalities.


Surely I am not saying that dolled up girls are the only alternative to aspie women.


Uh oh... I think I just did though :oops:

My inferiority complex coming through. I always feel like guys want someone prettier than the likes of me.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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16 Aug 2018, 8:38 am

hurtloam wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
hurtloam wrote:
There are definitely types of people though. Maybe don't look for "aspies" as they will be hard to find. Just don't try and go for the ultra dolled up girls who want a house full of things from (what's the American equivalent of Next?) And who wants a flash car and money for expensive hair and nails.

There's plenty of more down to earth women who don't care about outward showiness. They are not so "in-your-face" and are harder to spot.

It's like I won't chase after guys who drive BMWs and who are obsessed with soccer and beer. Unless it's artisanal beer ;) there would be no point. They and I are not at all alike or liable to be attracted to each other's personalities.


Surely I am not saying that dolled up girls are the only alternative to aspie women.


Uh oh... I think I just did though :oops:

My inferiority complex coming through. I always feel like guys want someone prettier than the likes of me.



What can I do, the whole forum tried to arrange a date between us, they were even trying to do fundraising, we had the chance to become a millionaire couple, we could spend the honeymoon in Bora Bora and breed a lot of little babies, but you rejected me for two hypothetical boyfriends. :| :cry:











:lol:



rdos
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16 Aug 2018, 10:37 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
"You should focus on finding an aspie woman" is the most unrealistic and senseless advice that could be given to guys here, yet I have seen it numerous times.

It's like saying "focus on winning the lottery" instead of focusing to acquire a good career.


It depends on what "aspie" is. If aspie is somebody diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome then it is useless. I've stopped using aspie because some people have decided it actually is AS, even if that was not the original intention.



hurtloam
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16 Aug 2018, 12:38 pm

rdos wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
"You should focus on finding an aspie woman" is the most unrealistic and senseless advice that could be given to guys here, yet I have seen it numerous times.

It's like saying "focus on winning the lottery" instead of focusing to acquire a good career.


It depends on what "aspie" is. If aspie is somebody diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome then it is useless. I've stopped using aspie because some people have decided it actually is AS, even if that was not the original intention.


That's what I was trying to say, but I only ended up stereotyping people :/


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fifasy
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16 Aug 2018, 1:10 pm

hurtloam wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
hurtloam wrote:
There are definitely types of people though. Maybe don't look for "aspies" as they will be hard to find. Just don't try and go for the ultra dolled up girls who want a house full of things from (what's the American equivalent of Next?) And who wants a flash car and money for expensive hair and nails.

There's plenty of more down to earth women who don't care about outward showiness. They are not so "in-your-face" and are harder to spot.

It's like I won't chase after guys who drive BMWs and who are obsessed with soccer and beer. Unless it's artisanal beer ;) there would be no point. They and I are not at all alike or liable to be attracted to each other's personalities.


Surely I am not saying that dolled up girls are the only alternative to aspie women.


Uh oh... I think I just did though :oops:

My inferiority complex coming through. I always feel like guys want someone prettier than the likes of me.


So drink a few shots of rum straight up, no mixer, and be bold. Once it's in your system you won't care anymore. Be seductive. You'll get the guy. Nothing succeeds like excess. If anything, all too often people are TOO polite. What is needed is to really grab someone's attention. You're doing them a favour as much as yourself.



rdos
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16 Aug 2018, 3:30 pm

fifasy wrote:
So drink a few shots of rum straight up, no mixer, and be bold. Once it's in your system you won't care anymore. Be seductive. You'll get the guy. Nothing succeeds like excess. If anything, all too often people are TOO polite. What is needed is to really grab someone's attention. You're doing them a favour as much as yourself.


I think you got it all wrong. It never was the intention that ND guys or girls would get more talkative with boose. Instead, ND guys and girls are not supposed to go up and talk to complete strangers, much less attractive potential partners.



fifasy
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16 Aug 2018, 3:55 pm

rdos wrote:
fifasy wrote:
So drink a few shots of rum straight up, no mixer, and be bold. Once it's in your system you won't care anymore. Be seductive. You'll get the guy. Nothing succeeds like excess. If anything, all too often people are TOO polite. What is needed is to really grab someone's attention. You're doing them a favour as much as yourself.


I think you got it all wrong. It never was the intention that ND guys or girls would get more talkative with boose. Instead, ND guys and girls are not supposed to go up and talk to complete strangers, much less attractive potential partners.


Well, maybe booze doesn't help you. It does help me to get more talkative. I was just saying what works for me really. In my opinion men make more of an effort to find women... than women make an effort to find men. Throughout my life I have seen men drink more alcohol... and take more risks than women. Because they have to! Generally speaking. But maybe Aspie women have to take more risks too. That was my thinking.



hurtloam
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16 Aug 2018, 10:18 pm

rdos wrote:
fifasy wrote:
So drink a few shots of rum straight up, no mixer, and be bold. Once it's in your system you won't care anymore. Be seductive. You'll get the guy. Nothing succeeds like excess. If anything, all too often people are TOO polite. What is needed is to really grab someone's attention. You're doing them a favour as much as yourself.


I think you got it all wrong. It never was the intention that ND guys or girls would get more talkative with boose. Instead, ND guys and girls are not supposed to go up and talk to complete strangers, much less attractive potential partners.


This is how the British do dating rdos. We are a pathetically reserved culture that can only express our feelings when drunk.


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hurtloam
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16 Aug 2018, 10:22 pm

fifasy wrote:

In my opinion men make more of an effort to find women... than women make an effort to find men. Throughout my life I have seen men drink more alcohol... and take more risks than women. Because they have to! Generally speaking. But maybe Aspie women have to take more risks too. That was my thinking.


In my experience men don't make much effort. It's always me doing the asking and inviting. It really gets me down. No one seems to want to put themselves out there to get to know me. It's always down to me to try and organise the next meet up. I'm sick of it. I wish someone would like me enough to want to ask me out not always me asking them, putting myself forward and getting rejected in the long run. It's depressing.


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Sabreclaw
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16 Aug 2018, 11:55 pm

hurtloam wrote:
fifasy wrote:

In my opinion men make more of an effort to find women... than women make an effort to find men. Throughout my life I have seen men drink more alcohol... and take more risks than women. Because they have to! Generally speaking. But maybe Aspie women have to take more risks too. That was my thinking.


In my experience men don't make much effort. It's always me doing the asking and inviting. It really gets me down. No one seems to want to put themselves out there to get to know me. It's always down to me to try and organise the next meet up. I'm sick of it. I wish someone would like me enough to want to ask me out not always me asking them, putting myself forward and getting rejected in the long run. It's depressing.


In my case I don't actively ask out the women I'm interested in because I have low self esteem and know they'll reject me. Then I risk being seen as a creep and would have to abandon the entire social circle. Basically, asking a girl out could cost me everything, so I don't.



The_Face_of_Boo
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17 Aug 2018, 12:04 am

hurtloam wrote:
rdos wrote:
fifasy wrote:
So drink a few shots of rum straight up, no mixer, and be bold. Once it's in your system you won't care anymore. Be seductive. You'll get the guy. Nothing succeeds like excess. If anything, all too often people are TOO polite. What is needed is to really grab someone's attention. You're doing them a favour as much as yourself.


I think you got it all wrong. It never was the intention that ND guys or girls would get more talkative with boose. Instead, ND guys and girls are not supposed to go up and talk to complete strangers, much less attractive potential partners.


This is how the British do dating rdos. We are a pathetically reserved culture that can only express our feelings when drunk.



It is why your football audience are infamously known to go bersker when your team loses.



The_Face_of_Boo
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17 Aug 2018, 12:44 am

Sabreclaw wrote:
hurtloam wrote:
fifasy wrote:

In my opinion men make more of an effort to find women... than women make an effort to find men. Throughout my life I have seen men drink more alcohol... and take more risks than women. Because they have to! Generally speaking. But maybe Aspie women have to take more risks too. That was my thinking.


In my experience men don't make much effort. It's always me doing the asking and inviting. It really gets me down. No one seems to want to put themselves out there to get to know me. It's always down to me to try and organise the next meet up. I'm sick of it. I wish someone would like me enough to want to ask me out not always me asking them, putting myself forward and getting rejected in the long run. It's depressing.


In my case I don't actively ask out the women I'm interested in because I have low self esteem and know they'll reject me. Then I risk being seen as a creep and would have to abandon the entire social circle. Basically, asking a girl out could cost me everything, so I don't.



Generally, if you ever second guess whether a girl likes you or not then it’s 99% chance means she doesn’t.

Usually women are way less subtle in showing interest than us men, even when they think they are not being so obvious.

So yeah, you are doing it right.



sleepingpancake
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17 Aug 2018, 12:47 am

**just a comment passing by, by a female aspie who never ever dated**


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