I recently kept telling a girl we didn't have to do stuff if she didn't want to and she said i went a little far, and she got it. And then I reached out the next day (something else happened that made me think to do this) and asked if i pushed her too far, and she was like naw you were one of the most respectful people i had a lot of fun.
Part of why do is I used to be a little pushier, and have also been on the opposing side, in situations where I didn't want to have sex and did (to avoid an argument, or cuz i didn't want to say no to that person - these are stories I don't want to get into).
But I've been like this with this person in other cases, and haven't been dropped yet. But that's not how being neurotic works, I guess.
I've been like this is in other friendships too! Complaining, and overthinking — it's bad anxiety. And I keep doing it, sometimes over things (occasionally even little things) from months or even years ago, and thinking anxiously about them. Getting depressed, getting scared. And venting it to my friends, to the point where friendships have suffered.
I don't know, it seems like we talk less often and there's way less substance to it than before, which is what is causing the anxiety.
Now for some reason I can't stop thinking about this, and its gotten to be more and more and more the case recently. I HATE it. Is anyone else like this?
08 Feb 2019, 12:07 am
