How Do People Do It?

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I just don't understand how anyone can get married.

My experience of life is that rarely in all my years of living have I had a girlfriend. Someone to share good times with in the hope that one day I will settle down to married life. But somehow, life has not worked out like that? I don't seem to be able to find a lady who can trust me.

So how can a couple do it? I mean... What do they do to stay attracted to each other? Am I missing something? I was always told it was love but somehow there is something else? Some sort of secret ingredient... Secret ingredients... Maybe McDonalds has the answer? They have secret ingredients? (Or do they?) I can ask? Haha! I would not know what to say!

Seemed like a good idea at the time. Both times.

There can be financial incentives. A widow can collect on a spouse's Social Security benefits when they turn 60 in the USA. There can also be significant tax breaks when one earns a lot more than the other.

Me & my girlfriend have been living together over 7 years now & we would be married by now but we're both disabled & it would screw up benefits. We do both love each other but there's other factors too. One factor is that we would both have problems living alone & living with our families would be worse. We are also both loyal to a fault & we would both have problems finding someone else if we broke up. I HATED being single & had a high desire for a serious romantic realtionship. Some of my issues are easier for me to deal with within a romantic relationship. I was VERY LONELY when I was single & I hated sleeping alone. I was single & looking for over 7 years straight between my 1st & 2nd girlfriend.

I am back to happy now as I missread a situation and all is fine...

I think that for me finding love was not easy... I mean... I can easily mess things up butI am learning!

I find it difficult too. I tried to get married a few weeks ago. I had to print out and fill out this form and then submit it with four weeks notice. I didn't know the answer to some of the questions so I put it on the coffee and lost it. If I get married it will probably be at the registry because weddings seem like a huge waste of money to me.

You will be fine MG, some of us ladies have been greatly hurt and trust doesn't come easy, just be yourself

I'm curious what kinds of questions they ask. I thought they would just want very basic information. I would wanna get married at the registry too cuz I have anxiety & don't like the idea of being the 2nd center of attention & i never really been into any kind of celebrations. Plus I only have one friend & no siblings so my girlfriend would have a lot more people for her than I would have for me unless I were to hire people like in the Kevin Hart movie The Wedding Ringer Not that this is anything for me to worry about rite now since we likely wouldn't be able to get married for a long time anyways.

I am on my third marriage.

I cant really recall what led up to the first two (NTs) - I think that I just went along with things and upon reflection was manipulated into it which was then followed by years of having my money surgically removed from my bank account and left with nothing. The money of course was not sufficient to maintain things and I was accused at great length on both occasions of not meeting their emotional needs. Could be right, I really dont know.

Ive never really been any good at approaching women and have been told on a number of occasions that I am quite oblivious to the signs that someone is flirting with me. I met the first two at work - both NHS nurses.

My current wife whilst being NT has an excellent level of insight into how I am. A number of her family have ASD and her previous husband has AS. He still has a lot of contact with the family and I see him on a regular basis. I think that he's OK. Their marriage didnt last due to an almost complete absence of physicality which is understandable.

If for some reason this marriage didnt work out (not that I am anticpating this) then I doubt whether I would bother again.

I am ok because my life does not matter, but I don't like upsetting anyone else...

Yeah, most of it's basic but the question that stumped me was "what is the name of the minister or celebrant who will perform the marriage?" If I'm going to the registry I don't know the name of the guy who's going to be there.

I feel exactly the same way. I get enough anxiety going to other people's weddings, let alone my own.

Now that the virus is on it means all weddings must be registry weddings, with no one but the two who are getting married, the celebrant and two witnesses. I have anxiety that my family will hate me for not inviting them but the virus would be the perfect excuse not to.

I guess they want you to line things up some kind of way before submitting the paperwork.

My uncle got remarried that way(married his 2nd wife). His mom(my grandma) & his daughter(my cousin) were the two witnesses. No one else in the family had a clue they were doing it till my grandma called after & told em. I'm not sure why they got married like that but it sure didn't bother me any.